what if you don't know how to accept him as a father, what if that whole concept is completely out of your reach because of your own afther?
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how do I let go?
- Thread starter luv4godremains
- Start date
lj4jc
Have you loved someone today? (1 Cor. 13)
I know this concept is hard if you didn't have good parents. I always felt God was up there ready to punish me and wanted me to live a rotten life. I grew in my faith and tho, I still feel that from time to time, I am slowly beginning to realize that is not the God I serve. I kept in the word and kept going to church and praying that God would show himself to me, and I slowly began to realize that God is a God of love and he is forgiving- not ready to zap you the minute you do something wrong. 
I hope this helps.
I hope this helps.
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Gracie710
Active Member
God led me to do many things to repair my emotional image of God as Father, so I would like to share them and you can take it as you may . . .
First, I found a Christian counselor who was a man, and who felt safe to me, and who was quite a bit older. Whenever I have that "mean dad" image of God in my mind, I remind myself that God is like the sweet Jesus-like counselor man, not my earthly dad. That helps.
Then I married a man who is loving, stable and kind. Now we have a daughter and I watch his love, adoration, patience, and kindness with her -- and his pure OBSESSION with protecting her, watching over her, how he gazes raptly at everything she does -- and I remind myself, my Daddy in heaven loves me MORE than that (sigh).
Then I watched every movie I could with a loving relationship between a dad and a daughter.
Then, when I feel really sad, I imagine myself crawling into my heavenly Father's lap and just being there with Him.
It's still tough sometimes (my earthly dad was very harsh, distant, unloving) but I've healed a bunch this way.
First, I found a Christian counselor who was a man, and who felt safe to me, and who was quite a bit older. Whenever I have that "mean dad" image of God in my mind, I remind myself that God is like the sweet Jesus-like counselor man, not my earthly dad. That helps.
Then I married a man who is loving, stable and kind. Now we have a daughter and I watch his love, adoration, patience, and kindness with her -- and his pure OBSESSION with protecting her, watching over her, how he gazes raptly at everything she does -- and I remind myself, my Daddy in heaven loves me MORE than that (sigh).
Then I watched every movie I could with a loving relationship between a dad and a daughter.
Then, when I feel really sad, I imagine myself crawling into my heavenly Father's lap and just being there with Him.
It's still tough sometimes (my earthly dad was very harsh, distant, unloving) but I've healed a bunch this way.
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- Oct 12, 2003
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Gracie710,
you da balm!
That post is rockin'!
what you do to get over your dad...I do to live next to my husband. Ain't that somethin'!
I COLLECT CDs, books, and DVDs that portray love in their lyrics and plots. Not just any lind of love, the kind that takes your breath away; the kind that when you've heard or seen it, you have been all amazed that they were acting or that anyone could have written such a script or such a lyric; the kind that you watch over and over...or listen to over and over and over. Then I turn my home into a garden of Eden kind of landscaping and paint and write and listen to music all the time like that...wear clothes that make me feel loveable and...all that stuff....
That's all the love there is sometimes...the kind I 'pipe in.' But it WORKS, most of the time. And my husband has no clue that I am healing him all the while...well, I guess he does really...but not that I know I am heeheehee.
I only have friends and relationships that are GOOD for me...reciprocal lovers; except for family, they can be broken. But, I don't let anyone harsh get into or stay in my world. I just shut them out, BOUNDARY!
My dad WAS a great man, but he died 10 years ago...he's never been replaced. My husband and son have his qualities in many ways...less develpoed and less demonstrative. The more they hang out with me, though, the less they can ignore Jesus. So, He IS transforming them both at their own pace. It is very HARD to wait for them...so there's always poetry, Shakespeare, Johnny Depp movies and JonBonJovi CDS....and Steven Tyler, Seether, Incubus, Evanescence, Howie Day, Pillar, Creed and Day of Fire....endless, soooo many other artists to drown in.....
...and, I can't wait to get to Heaven...sit on a hill and watch people loving, as long as I can see and hear them....it will heal all of me.
huh? Go figure. there ARE ways to survive your background and your environment.
you da balm!
That post is rockin'!
what you do to get over your dad...I do to live next to my husband. Ain't that somethin'!
I COLLECT CDs, books, and DVDs that portray love in their lyrics and plots. Not just any lind of love, the kind that takes your breath away; the kind that when you've heard or seen it, you have been all amazed that they were acting or that anyone could have written such a script or such a lyric; the kind that you watch over and over...or listen to over and over and over. Then I turn my home into a garden of Eden kind of landscaping and paint and write and listen to music all the time like that...wear clothes that make me feel loveable and...all that stuff....
That's all the love there is sometimes...the kind I 'pipe in.' But it WORKS, most of the time. And my husband has no clue that I am healing him all the while...well, I guess he does really...but not that I know I am heeheehee.
I only have friends and relationships that are GOOD for me...reciprocal lovers; except for family, they can be broken. But, I don't let anyone harsh get into or stay in my world. I just shut them out, BOUNDARY!
My dad WAS a great man, but he died 10 years ago...he's never been replaced. My husband and son have his qualities in many ways...less develpoed and less demonstrative. The more they hang out with me, though, the less they can ignore Jesus. So, He IS transforming them both at their own pace. It is very HARD to wait for them...so there's always poetry, Shakespeare, Johnny Depp movies and JonBonJovi CDS....and Steven Tyler, Seether, Incubus, Evanescence, Howie Day, Pillar, Creed and Day of Fire....endless, soooo many other artists to drown in.....
...and, I can't wait to get to Heaven...sit on a hill and watch people loving, as long as I can see and hear them....it will heal all of me.
huh? Go figure. there ARE ways to survive your background and your environment.
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wow, those posts have really opened my eyes, I thought that I could never be o after remembering all that happened, even though there are people who have been through soo much worse!
And, God's starting to break down some of my barriers i think, I just met a guy I really like, he's only a year older than me, and is really caring, would never do anything to hurt me, the catch though, he lives in South Africa, but it gives me hope that maybe someday, I can find another guy just like that, who will love me truely, and not want to ever hurt me, or abuse me, or anything bad like that!
It's given me hope also that maybe there is someone out there for me, that I can love and helpt hrough life, that I can help God heal, and know that just knowing him and having him in my life will help heal the wounds my past has given me!
And, God's starting to break down some of my barriers i think, I just met a guy I really like, he's only a year older than me, and is really caring, would never do anything to hurt me, the catch though, he lives in South Africa, but it gives me hope that maybe someday, I can find another guy just like that, who will love me truely, and not want to ever hurt me, or abuse me, or anything bad like that!
It's given me hope also that maybe there is someone out there for me, that I can love and helpt hrough life, that I can help God heal, and know that just knowing him and having him in my life will help heal the wounds my past has given me!
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- Oct 12, 2003
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luv4godremains,
What ever happened with that girl who prayed for you at church who you shared about your abuse with? Anything?
What ever happened with that girl who prayed for you at church who you shared about your abuse with? Anything?
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ljorem, he is, God has someone in mind for you, he doesn't want you to be lonely! I know it's hard to believe, but it's true!
Sha, I don't know what's happenning with that, no one has spoken to me about it since, thankfully, but I know that the person I told is praying for me, and that's really great cos I have an adult from church that I can chat to and get prayer from about this!
Sha, I don't know what's happenning with that, no one has spoken to me about it since, thankfully, but I know that the person I told is praying for me, and that's really great cos I have an adult from church that I can chat to and get prayer from about this!
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belladonic-haze
Guest
luv4godremains said:
I am letting go step by step...baby steps, with the love of God and Jesus.......It is hard , but everyday I smile a little bit more.......Just believe that God knows that you are worth it and He loves your smiles. He is there, carrying you. It's sounds silly but that is what I believe and what saved my life...
Time for a group HUG
Love and sunshine on every little step of your way to the sunny days,
Bella
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lj4jc
Have you loved someone today? (1 Cor. 13)
belladonic-haze said:I am letting go step by step...baby steps, with the love of God and Jesus.......It is hard , but everyday I smile a little bit more.......Just believe that God knows that you are worth it and He loves your smiles. He is there, carrying you. It's sounds silly but that is what I believe and what saved my life...
Time for a group HUG
Love and sunshine on every little step of your way to the sunny days,
Bella
This is all we can do at times- take baby steps- trusting God our Father to be there to catch us when we fall.
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yer, I realised God is getting me there, because I never trust people, let alone guys, and now I have a boyfriend, and I trust him quite a lot, I know God put us together for a reason, and, I dunno, I'm really scared, but I know he trusts my boundaries, and am beginning to trust more thanks to him! I'm taking baby steps, and things seem to be giong well at the moment! I get scared, but I know that God is with me, I know he is keeping me on track, and that each time I fall, he is there, always, ready to pick me up again!
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here's the secret to letting go.
1) Tell youself..it's over...(whateve it is)
2) You can't change what's in the past.
3) You need to rethink about priority.
4) God
5) Work out
6) Have the attitude of "I don't care"
7) Treat yourself to a movie..or something.
8) Tell youself that you are tired of being depress, aren't you?
1) Tell youself..it's over...(whateve it is)
2) You can't change what's in the past.
3) You need to rethink about priority.
4) God
5) Work out
6) Have the attitude of "I don't care"
7) Treat yourself to a movie..or something.
8) Tell youself that you are tired of being depress, aren't you?
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I definately am tired of being depressed, and I know my boyfriend deserves better, I also know that God will heal me in his own time for good reasons, and I just can't wait untill that day arrives when I can finally say "I beat depression, self-harm, eating disorders, everything that the Devil threw at me, I learnt to get rid of them in the protection and love of the Holy spirit!" it's gonna be great, and I know this will happen, because God has promised me that it will, so untill that day, I do my best to live with it, pray about it, and help others, and when that day arrives, I won't stop trying to help others!
oh yer, to the whole "work out" thing, I've tried, but it makes me ill, cos I don't eat much and end up anorexic again, so I do small amounts of excercise instead! thanks guys! I think I'm getting there, I wanna forgive these people, and I knwo that God will help me to when I'm ready!
oh yer, to the whole "work out" thing, I've tried, but it makes me ill, cos I don't eat much and end up anorexic again, so I do small amounts of excercise instead! thanks guys! I think I'm getting there, I wanna forgive these people, and I knwo that God will help me to when I'm ready!
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thanks Koban4max, and everyone else who has posted on here, I know I'll get there! your care has helped me along with advise, opinions and views that have all been put on here, God will get all of us there I think, it's just gonna take time!
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lol, thanks, just when I was feeling down again! hmm.........
you guys are all amazing! hope you all find what you're searching for!
you guys are all amazing! hope you all find what you're searching for!
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