As I already told you, I do agree with design, I'm not arguing Adam and Steve, for crying out loud. I am saying as a result of their sin coming into the world, not only do we get tempted but we have defect. I don't believe God expects us to change, and if He does, that isn't a God I want to serve, I would rather go to hell, yes HELL
Brother I have experienced something very similar to Hell, and trust me when I tell you that you do not want to Go there.
I am not even sure what happened to me, but I was being switched from one pain medication, to another, and at first, it seemed a blessing, I was even thinking of asking my doctor to double the dosage, then on the third day I began to burn a little At first I didn't thik much of it, as I have had burning pain on occasion before, then the next morning I woke up feeling a little rough like when you are about to come down with the flu or something. So when the family went off for errands I stayed home, 15 minutes later my whole body was on Fire, my very flesh was burning from the inside out, my bones felt like they were expanding, and then the pain radiated out into the rest of my flesh, it was near maddening, I burned for 4 hours straight, If I thought I could have drove myself I would have went to the emergency Room, then it eased up, So I waited, then 2 or 3 hours later it started again. This lasted for approximately one month, and slowly eased off of the cycling during that time. I also had fever, nausea , and chills. I was incredibly weak, and everything fatigued me. once the cycling passed, the pain level I had was aproximately triple to what I had before the reaction. I have not gotten much better since, and this was in Nov 2004. It cost me my job, and my "life".
The doctors were clueless and did little to nothing to help me, they tripled my old pain medicine, which was now useless, even if I tripled the dosage. But It has taught me paitence, and given me a taste of the fire, something I do not wish to experience again.
I used to crack jokes about wanting morphine, the medicine that did this to me was aproximately 70-100 times more potent. And now I experience no relief, I cannot remember what it was like to be without pain. But I also realize that this is all temporary. Hell is not.
What you describe about God is you desire to conform his will to your own. and if he rejects then You reject him. Do you not see a problem with this? No matter what issue you might disagree with?
God's design is tainted because of ADAM AND EVE'S free will and how they brought corruption and defect into this world. If God really wanted to change it, He would not allow homosexuality to be born into the bloodline to start. Lots of HIS creations already show these tendencies, and He doesn't stop it. So you are saying it is perverted in humans? Whatever...it's a bunch of conservative garbage crap and I am through with it. I don't like anyone who flaunts their sexuality, but I am seeing more and more why those parades exist, and I can't stand anything to do w/the gay cultural stuff (feminine walking, talking, wearing high heel shoes, etc), but nonetheless I get why they march in those parades.
Heck if I have to hold up picket signs, I might...I am SO sick of people trying to change others.
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Adam and Eve may have brought sin into the world, but we are not told to enjoy or partake in it. It should revulse us. You said you struggle, We all have , we are told we will suffer in this life.
Don't let it harden your heart.
You have already explained how you personally view the scriptures, All I can Do is pray that it might change.
But please consider what it is you are saying, when you speak of rejecting God, the alternative is not really any sort of choice. That anyone that knows better would make.
