Dumbest Jokes of All Time

[Presbyterian Continuist]

 

[Bob Crowley]

And verily, it "came to pass" (thus quoting the Book of Mormon), that God's voice drifted through the window and said "I gave you free will didn't I??"

"Now get up and shut the window yourself. And in any case why shouldn't the raccoons be able to live in your house? They're My creatures too you know!"

 

[prodromos]

A woman gives birth every two minutes.

What we have to do is find this woman and stop her.

 

[Presbyterian Continuist]

 

[Presbyterian Continuist]

 

[Presbyterian Continuist]

 

[Presbyterian Continuist]

 

[Presbyterian Continuist]

 

[Bob Crowley]

View attachment 344220

I actually did this once - a long time ago.

I was standing there with the dog's heartworm tablet in my hand, and day dreaming about something.

I looked down and saw the tablet. I suppose it was a reflex action but the next thing I knew I'd taken the dog's tablet.

I ended up ringing the poisons bureau (or whatever it's called) to find out if it was going to matter. The bloke on the other end didn't think so, but at least I was not going to get heartworm for a couple of days!

 

[JohnC101]

 

[Bumble Bee]

Hahaha my husband loved these. He has a shirt that says “dad joke loading”

 

[Presbyterian Continuist]

 

[Presbyterian Continuist]

 

[Presbyterian Continuist]

 

[Bumble Bee]

Out of all the inventions in the world, the whiteboard is the most remarkable.

 

[Bumble Bee]

I have a vegetable joke, but it’s corny

(Credit goes to The Chosen)

 

[Bob Crowley]

That joke's a has-bean.

 

[Presbyterian Continuist]

That joke's a has-bean.

It was posted by a human bean.

 

[th1bill]

A biker goes into a mega church. Typical biker long hair, beard, tatoos, leather jacket, clean but worn jeans and boots. The good church folk inch away from him. After the service the pastor stops him at the door and says "If you come back next week pray and ask God how you should dress when you come to this church."
The following Sunday the biker was back. The pastor stopped him at the door and said, "I thought I told you to ask God how you should dress when you come to this church." The biker said I did, He said "He didn't know, He's never been in this church."
.....Now for a real story. A biker pastor I know visited our somewhat conservative church. He could have been the biker in the above story. He said he visited another local church he wouldn't say which. He was stopped in the foyer and told "You can't come in here. You represent the world and we have separated from the world." Or words to that affect.

Sad!

 

[JohnC101]