What is the main confusion and source of such contention between denominations?
Between my Baptist and Catholic relatives, I find the major points of argument are Mariology and baptismal theology. That said, I've yet to see any of my family members bicker about these points. It's not because we don't talk about our faith, because we all talk about it a lot. Heck, my Evangelical Baptist parents are my Catholic cousins' godparents. We just don't give each other trouble about it (Or at least, no one has since the late 1960s).
What are the pain points for your denom.?
I was raised in the Baptist church. One of the things that makes Baptists baptists is that they believe it's important that baptism be done by immersion. You also shouldn't baptize children under the age of reason. They also don't believe baptism does anything. At all. It doesn't bestow grace. It doesn't wash away original sin. It's just... a thing we do that has to be done in a highly specific way. To this day, I still don't get why it's so all-fired important that someone be baptized in a highly specific way if it doesn't do anything.
Also the "no dancing, no drinking, no playing cards" thing, though the last one may be more cultural than theological. Especially since most card games I know I learned on mission trips with my Baptist church choir.
What draws one person to one denom. and not another?
Well, for some, it's necessity. My Cajun relatives in Louisiana became Baptist because in the 1930s their community couldn't convince the diocese to send them a Catholic priest (They lived in the middle of nowhere in a rural, swampy area isolated enough that nobody spoke English as a first language, if they spoke English at all).
Other people convert for love. My family is full of Catholics and Protestants falling in love and one of them converting to the other's denomination, whether eventually or immediately.
But for others, it has to do with theology. Maybe they were raised in it. Maybe they found a verse that changed everything. It depends.
Why did you pick your denomination?
*deep inhale* Here it goes.
So I was raised in an Evangelical Baptist church, but the digging I've done into theology, church history, and the Bible has made me decidedly less so. My profile describes me as "Baptist who thinks the Catholics are onto something", but if pressed to give a specific denomination, I'd probably say Anglican. In fact, I've even felt God calling me to be Anglican.
So why don't I start attending an Anglican church and convert already? Well, the stuff going on between Episcopalians, Reformed Episcopalians, ACNA Anglicans, and Continuing Anglicans makes me hesitant to join any of those groups. I'd ask a question in the Anglican forum on here, but I don't know how I'd phrase the questions I want to ask without starting a brawl.
Also, my mom isn't too keen on my desire to start attending a different church, especially one that does things so differently from Baptists. Even though I am an adult, I'm still a college student living at home, so I'm respecting my mom's wishes for the time being. So I'm stuck being Baptist in name only for the time being.
TL;DR... Theology has changed what I believe, but parents and church politics have shaped where I go.
Why do some denominations follow the teachings of one Man/Woman's beliefs about what the Bible says rather than spending time doing self thought?
I feel like this is an inaccurate statement about a lot of Christian denominations. Many are based on ideas accumulated over time, or on decisions made by groups at Church councils. Also, it assumes people in every denomination have the exact same ideas about everything and never dissent from each other. I know Baptist ministers who disagree vehemently on different minutiae of doctrine, but they're still both Baptists.
Why do you or don't you use "We" and "Us" and "Our" when speaking about general theology?
I tend to use "we", "us", and "our" when talking about things in the various creeds (Apostles, Nicene, etc.). Things get tricky when it gets into Coptic Orthodoxy (and I think the rest of Oriental Orthodoxy) vs. pretty much everyone else on the whole monophysite vs. hypostatic union debacle, but otherwise that tends to work.
If I'm talking about something more specific, like interpretations of Revelation, etc., I'll get into the different ideas and say "[denomination a] believes [doctrine a], but [denomination b] believes [doctrine b]," but otherwise, that's my rule of thumb.
EDIT: And for my personal opinions, I try to remind people that it's just my understanding of the doctrine.
