First, Scripture says we know in part. So it is a possibility that nobody can know for sure. Second, how soon are we talking here about us being aware in the after-life? What verse suggests it is immediate? My stand so far on soul sleep is that it only lasts briefly for a short period of time after physical death before they cross over to either paradise or torments (whereby they are consciously aware of their surroundings). This is based on Jesus distinguishing twice between sleep and death and also the real life narrative of Lazarus and the Richman.
What I have not seen in Scripture yet is that one can sleep again after going to such places. If so, is it a different kind of sleep? Perhaps some answers are not available to us about such details involving the after life. But it will not stop me from asking God about it and stopping in searching the Scriptures to see whether those things be so or not.
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A couple questions for you.
According to the bible, when are men given rewards for their works? When is all of our works brought into judgement? The bible clearly teaches that Jesus will come again to give every man his rewards according as his works shall be. Jesus said in John 14: 1 - 3 that he is going to prepare a place for us and it is when he comes again that he will take us to that place. If we go to Hell or Heaven/Paradise before the second coming, then this goes against what the bible says. It makes sense to me that everyone would be in their graves awaiting their judgement.
Joh 5:28 Marvel not at this: for the hour is coming, in the which all that are in the graves shall hear his voice,
Joh 5:29 And shall come forth; they that have done good, unto the resurrection of life; and they that have done evil, unto the resurrection of damnation.
Dan 12:1 And at that time shall Michael stand up, the great prince which standeth for the children of thy people: and there shall be a time of trouble, such as never was since there was a nation even to that same time: and at that time thy people shall be delivered, every one that shall be found written in the book.
Dan 12:2
And many of them that sleep in the dust of the earth shall awake, some to everlasting life, and some to shame and everlasting contempt.
Job 14:12 So man lieth down, and riseth not: till the heavens be no more, they shall not awake, nor be raised out of their sleep.
Job 14:13 O that thou wouldest hide me in the grave, that thou wouldest keep me secret, until thy wrath be past, that thou wouldest appoint me a set time, and remember me!
Job 14:14 If a man die, shall he live again? all the days of my appointed time will I wait, till my change come.
What time is it that the heavens will be no more and a change will come?
2Pe 3:10 But the day of the Lord will come as a thief in the night; in the which the heavens shall pass away with a great noise, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat, the earth also and the works that are therein shall be burned up.
1Co 15:51 Behold, I shew you a mystery; We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed,
1Co 15:52 In a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trump: for the trumpet shall sound, and the dead shall be raised incorruptible, and we shall be changed.
When you look at all these scriptures together you get the understanding that nobody is going to heaven or hell at the moment of death, but they die and are resurrected when Jesus comes back to receive their reward. This is what was believed in Jesus' day because when Jesus told Martha that lazarus shall rise again, she said yes, at the resurrection at the last day. Why did she believe that? Because that is what the bible said which in her case would have been the Old Testament.
Concerning the issue you brought up about men burning for eternity. I don't believe this for the very reasons you stated but these scriptures also help.
Joh 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not
perish, but have everlasting life.
Perishing is being contrasted to having eternal life. If you are being tormented forever, then by definition you cannot perish, instead you must have eternal life.
Psa 37:9 For evildoers shall be cut off: but those that wait upon the LORD, they shall inherit the earth.
Psa 37:10 For yet a little while, and
the wicked shall not be: yea, thou shalt diligently consider his place, and it shall not be.
Psa 37:20 But the wicked shall
perish, and the enemies of the LORD shall be as the fat of lambs: they shall consume; into smoke shall they
consume away.
Mal 4:1 For, behold, the day cometh, that shall burn as an oven; and all the proud, yea, and all that do wickedly, shall be stubble: and the day that cometh shall
burn them up, saith the LORD of hosts,
that it shall leave them neither root nor branch.
Mal 4:3 And ye shall tread down the wicked; for they shall be
ashes under the soles of your feet in the day that I shall do this, saith the LORD of hosts.
Here again we see the idea of the wicked being consumed and devoured so that they no longer exist, which is opposite to them forever existing in torment.
Rev 20:13 And the sea gave up the dead which were in it; and death and hell delivered up the dead which were in them: and they were judged every man according to their works.
Rev 20:14 And death and hell were cast into the lake of fire.
This is the second death.
Rev 20:15 And whosoever was not found written in the book of life was cast into the lake of fire.
The first lie of the devil was to do with death. Telling Adam and Eve that they were not going to die when God said they would surely die. And this is still a problem today and its the same lie. The second death is a finality, but some believe that the second death is eternal life in torment. There are scriptures which seem to say that, but the fires of Sodom and Gomorrah were also described as eternal and it is not burning today.