Brains and Beauty: Oil and Water?

[elenore]

(and smart, kind, wise, intelligent, gentle, thoughtful...)

strong, tough, clear sighted, patient, fun -


looks are nice, but who really cares. as long as you don't find them repulsive.

 

[Amber.ly]

It takes so much time and money to be beautiful (using today's culture for the standard of "beauty") that you can't afford to be both

 

[MacFall]

Looks are to oil as brains are to water. They float on the surface and obscure what lies beneath.

 

[Rory]

I can name 5 off the top of my head that you know on here.

Ethnog
Amber
Henrietta
Obzocky
leothelioness

Not to mention about 50+ more on the forums. These are just a small sample of the ones that make me feel I need a helmet with a spinner on top at times . Also I highly doubt CF has the only women with that combo lol. It's probably more common than you think IMO.

I've known many IRL as well. Sadly haven't dated many of them but they exist for sure.

 

[SweetDee]

There are so many people right here on CF who are both attractive and intelligent. The two attributes are more than compatible.

Didn't read past this.


QFT. Anything else I add would come across snarky, so I will just leave it at this.

 

[Obzocky]

There are a lot of people who have less expected of them academically due to their looks. On the flipside there are a lot of people who have more expected of them academically due to their looks. They have to prove that they're more than another pretty face smiling their way through life.

They mix, I know many pretty individuals who are smarter than I, smarter than what most consider "intelligent" looks. I know many individuals a crayon short of a box regardless of attraction. Perhaps people do not have to show it as much, when you have nothing working for you physically and you know it you strive to show the world you can shine in other ways. Sometimes.

But then my attractive and your attractive are probably quite different

 

[acropolis]

Of course people can be smart and attractive! There is no grand balance at work in human attributes; just because someone has a lot of one good quality, doesn't mean they will be deficient in another area. People who believe that nonsense are just insecure and looking for reasons to diminish those who possess qualities they themselves lack.

 

[Starnchrist]

I think that's a stereotype, that, if you're ever going to find the right person for you, that you should learn to look past.

I have found that I am more attracted to a woman's personality than her looks. If she has a great sense of humor and loves to laugh and is sort of...strange ...I am more inclined to find her to be more attractive. So really, it should be the person she is that you find the most attractive about her.

I think the reason why a lot of relationships and marriages fail is because people look at outward attractiveness first and that will only get you so far before you realize you have nothing in common with this person and he/she is not the person you thought they were.

^^ YES! Like can you send me a clone of yourself to NEW YORK.

 

[broken_one]

Only going to quote the two posts on this topic on the current page.

I can name 5 off the top of my head that you know on here.

Ethnog
Amber
Henrietta
Obzocky
leothelioness

Not to mention about 50+ more on the forums. These are just a small sample of the ones that make me feel I need a helmet with a spinner on top at times . Also I highly doubt CF has the only women with that combo lol. It's probably more common than you think IMO.

I've known many IRL as well. Sadly haven't dated many of them but they exist for sure.

Didn't read past this.

I really dislike when people do this. You're putting me up against a wall, and then when I try to do anything you're going to shoot me like a rebellious Fenian (is there any other kind? ).

I'll just say it here, and wait for the bullets to come. This is one of "my" moments.

I don't find actually anyone on here very attractive (who are active posters anyway, minus one person). There's other issues regarding that person. So don't try to delve, because I'm rather not in the mood.

I understand that girls like to do a lot of "rah-rah" and pump each other up, and to a degree self-esteem is important, but this whole notion of "because ______ is smart and we say they're pretty, that means that you're wrong Sean and you're just stupid!"

It doesn't work that way. I definitely agree that a lot of posters on here are great people, but I just don't find them attractive.

Okay?

 

[SweetDee]

....


I'm just going to unsubscribe. Best of luck Sean.

 

[Wren]

Only going to quote the two posts on this topic on the current page.




I really dislike when people do this. You're putting me up against a wall, and then when I try to do anything you're going to shoot me like a rebellious Fenian (is there any other kind? ).

I'll just say it here, and wait for the bullets to come. This is one of "my" moments.

I don't find actually anyone on here very attractive (who are active posters anyway, minus one person).

When I responded previously, I did so with my audience (or, rather, the OP) in mind. I'm not offended at all that you don't see me as the hot stuff that I so clearly am.

 

[acropolis]

Only going to quote the two posts on this topic on the current page.




I really dislike when people do this. You're putting me up against a wall, and then when I try to do anything you're going to shoot me like a rebellious Fenian (is there any other kind? ).

I'll just say it here, and wait for the bullets to come. This is one of "my" moments.

I don't find actually anyone on here very attractive (who are active posters anyway, minus one person). There's other issues regarding that person. So don't try to delve, because I'm rather not in the mood.

I understand that girls like to do a lot of "rah-rah" and pump each other up, and to a degree self-esteem is important, but this whole notion of "because ______ is smart and we say they're pretty, that means that you're wrong Sean and you're just stupid!"

It doesn't work that way. I definitely agree that a lot of posters on here are great people, but I just don't find them attractive.

Okay?

Haha you are precious. You're also totally off-base in thinking that attractiveness and intelligence are in any way mutually exclusive, and a misogynist for thinking they are exclusive only in women (insofar as you believe these things, anyway). And you continue to make threads wondering why you're still alone, gee I wonder why? Maybe it's because you think anyone you're attracted to is an idiot?

 

[Starnchrist]

ay ay Brokenone... ouch, but your just not attracted to some people. I can't shoot you down for that. To each their own right? But I'm not gonna talk about whether I'm pretty or not, but I guess this thread just got ugly ouch. It's all good to each their own. I'm still beautiful.

 

[Rory]

Sean, it's cool dude if you don't find them attractive.

The problem with this question is nobody can really answer it for you, as you have proven with your reply beauty is a personal preference. I wasn't posting to prove you wrong really, just pointing out that there are examples here. Of course I didn't expect everyone to agree with me.

So really this is something that should more be a personal question instead of an open discussion. Everyone will have an opinion and nobody has to agree with those opinions.

Personally as I said I find the ones I mentioned to fit both requirements you set forth. You disagree, cool whatever, thats ok.

However a better question is are those the two most important requirements for you in a woman? Not trying to call you out or anything but just giving my thoughts on this. For me at least these are more bonus than major issues.

I find other traits much more worth seeking such as faith, sense of humor, trustworthiness, caring for others, etc.

Of course I'll admit looks do play a part in picking a partner, you have to like looking at them, but IMO at least I'd never make it a focus point. Intelligence either, because really all we can judge that by is our own intelligence. Which means every person you meet practically will either be dumber or smarter than you whether by a little or a lot. If you're looking for the perfect intellectual match that is also your view of beautiful, then yeah you may have a hard time in your search.

Add on the other criteria I mentioned as must haves and you may end up...

 

[Blank123]

There are so many people right here on CF who are both attractive and intelligent. The two attributes are more than compatible.

</thread>

 

[K9_Trainer]

Alright lets not forget that physical attractiveness is mostly subjective. It depends on the individual person.

No need to get all butthurt because Sean doesn't find you physically attractive. It doesn't mean you are ugly or an eyesore to the whole world; he can probably even find a Victoria's Secret model unattractive.

Sean has his "type" and its unfortunate that he has not met many women he finds attractive to also be intelligent. The thread actually has a topic to discuss to share opinions, as indicated by the general questions he bolded at the end of his topic. It was probably bolded for a reason. I'm not sure how it turned into a "lets drill Sean!" thread. Not once did he say he doesn't think a woman can be both attractive and intelligent. He simply said that he's had difficulty finding one, and I know for a fact that he's not the only one who's found themselves in that predicament.

 

[LoneSheep]

Add on the other criteria I mentioned as must haves and you may end up...

A crying potato head?

 

[MehGuy]

Well just hope the women don't have the same standards as you then.

I normally wouldn't say this, but I think you have been a jerk in this thread, though I think you are a self defeating person anyways so you'll probably enjoy my post anyways...

Still can't believe people continue to post in his countless women threads. All he does is whine and tick off people in the right way in the hopes that they will insult him, nothing ever gets accomplished because it never was meant too. That's what I see anyways.

 

[Blank123]

nope Sean doesn't have to be attracted to anyone here. And no, he doesn't have to say that he finds women attractive when he doesn't. Attraction is subjective. I think most people here actually are very good looking people, but thats just me .

I think it was more the way Sean phrased his thoughts on the subject that was offensive to people rather than the fact that he's not attracted to women here. The way it was phrased made it sound like an objective fact that women here are not attractive - whether or not he meant it in that way... only he knows. I'm not going to judge that.

Specific women probably didn't have to be singled out either. I know it was meant as a compliment to those women, and I know that it wasn't Sean doing the singling out. but it makes it much more personal when you have specific people in mind and those things are being said. hence the offensiveness.

basically... i think this thread is broken beyond repair at this point.it'd be best to take what nuggets of wisdom you can from this, Sean, and let the thread die.

 

[Amber.ly]

As one of those mentioned women- I wasn't at all offended by what Sean said.


But I do have to wonder why he even started this thread if his end goal was to talk only about women HE found both beautiful and intelligent? Because they don't exist. So there is no actual topic I guess.