Anyone hate the waiting?

[flightangel777]

I disagree i don't think dating is a good idea it could really lead you into something you don't want beileve me! and dating someone for no reason but to enjoy there company is also dum if your not going to be with them in the future theres no reason. To date but if you want to ask some guy you like to go with you to a school dance or Prom thats way diffrent don't date but have fun you can flirt and dance with guys but don't take this dating stuff seriously. Wait on the Lord have you ever considerd that God wants you to wait for the right guy becuase when you do you won't be a confussed on what guy is right for you lol anyways just have some fun with friends and don't take this dating stuff so seriously. Cause you have your whole life ahead of you and theres so much more then having some guy take up your time just pray about it and let the Lord show you what you should do. But i highly would suggest not dating cuase it can lead you down a really bad path that you might think is innocent but can turn ugly in the end.

 

[simpletrust]

I come from an economically depressed rural area. People don't need college.

For some reason, the idea of that sort of area fills me with fascination. Now, I'm not saying I think rural people are weird - hear me out first and I think you'll see what I mean. I really want to get married. Most people I know what to get married as well but the non-christians probably not until they're in their very late thirties. Up until then they'll have multiple partners and live with them before marriage. Some of them may never make their relationships official, they just stay de facto. That isn't what I want for myself. Thing is, where I live it's not considered "financially appropriate" to marry young. It's considered a stupid thing to do, because it apparently limts your choices in life, or sets up up for divorce right from the start. I can't stand that people think that way, but they do.

It doesn't seem fair to me that in the old days, marrying at an age now considered "too young" was the entirely normal thing to do, and now people who do it can be considered foolish. I want to get married if I think I've met the one for me but I don't want my sister, brother and father to be on my back about it, telling me I'm ruining my life.

Also, I want to go to University, not because I think I need it but because I think I'd enjoy it, but I can see how it would get in the way of marriage as well.

Maybe you can see why an economically repressed rural area where people don't need college and can get married young strikes a very whimsical chord in me. It makes me wish I was a rural girl.

I disagree i don't think dating is a good idea it could really lead you into something you don't want beileve me! and dating someone for no reason but to enjoy there company is also dum if your not going to be with them in the future theres no reason.

Hmm, I agree that dating CAN lead you into something you don't want, but that doesn't necessarily mean its an entirely not good idea. I think a dating experience can teach you a lot about having a relationship with a member of the opposite sex. People say you can learn all that through having guy friends but I don't think this is true - I had plenty of guy friends before going out with the guy I did, in fact, he was one of them, but looking back on the relationship I feel I know a lot of things that will be very useful when I meet someone else (like the guy I'd end up marrying!!). I don't mean someone should sacrifice their heart or purity or anything for the sake of learning something, but I think you can learn something without getting in too deep.

 

[silentpoet]

I hate this waiting with all my heart, soul, and strength. I hate the uncertainty of waiting on God. It really hurts my faith. I do my best, but waiting on God wears me down. This is not to say my life is awful, because in most other areas life is good or at least OK and getting better. This lack of provision so far is the sore thumb of my life.

 

[Keen]

Our Heavenly Father knows pain. He knows the suffering that the sin of others can cause, because he felt it first hand. Take heart, you are in good company.

 

[Sindyan]

I have to kind of both agree and disagree with the comments about Dating.

It can be a good thing at times.

By going out to Lunch with girls, going to the zoo, etc...aka Dates...it has helped me so much in my area of romance. I could relax, and get to know girls as friends so much easier

I used....my entire focus and question was "is she the one", and i was so worried about not guarding a girls heart...to a unhealthy extreme...that i could meet anyone...I couldn't talk to a girl because i was afraid i wasn't guarding their heart. So...no one was attracted or took an interest in me.

Yes...i have had some mistakes, and it's been a learning process...but i have learned to relax and not take things as serious...well serious is a bad word...not as controlling. I know myself, and my patterns...so i can make sure I don't do things I know is just messing with a girl's heart.

So the sum up
Dating
Yes, to help you relax around the opposite sex, and to get to know people
No, if your life and sense of identity is around that.

 

[flightangel777]

Don't you know thats what the devil wants for people we don't have to know everything about women and men to meet the right person theres nothing wrong with having healthy reltionships with friends but dating is degrading in a way. Becuase the more you date and have relationships the more your missing out on that experinace you can have with your future husbend or wife so trying to learn something is not fun beileve me it dosent help you find the right person everyone is diffrent so dating people will not help you find the right person. But forming good healthy relationships can help you get to know that person on a more real level. I hate that book kiss dating goodbye but the only thing i agree is that people need to diffrently kiss dating goodbye for sure cuase it leads people a stray and can ruine young peoples lives.

 

[Sindyan]

Well, define what a date is?

Everything I have been on...was just hanging out together, but people call it a "date".

Yes, I don't believe emotion flings every week is a good thing. By far no.

To me there is a difference between hanging out with the opposite sex to get to know them better than going out with someone for a romantic/emotional but with no commitment night.

Maybe, what we need to do...is to define what a date is, what is dating

From what I have heard in the dating circles

Dating is getting to know someone romantically with no commitment yet.
-this I really don't agree with.

"going steady"-in a committed romantic relationship.

All of the wording, and mumble jumble I really don't care about.

Romance should be taken seriously, and the hearts behind them.

I have read 7+ books on relationships and romance. I have seen and read this from both sides of the fence. The Courtship (I kissed dating goodbye) and the Dating (Undressed) sides.

The conclusion....

I put down the books and had enough of people telling me what to think. I will still heed wisdom, and correction from my mentors, and friends.

I stopped sitting around expecting God to bring someone to me without any work or risk....aka Waiting on the Lord to the point that it's my lack of desire to risk is what was holding me back, and not God's not bringing the right person into my life.

I began to walk. I trust that Christ will guide me, my friends will keep me accountability and encourage me, and that work that God has done in my life will show it's fruit. It's not by my own understanding, but the understanding of the wisdom of God.

 

[Airicon]

I come from an economically depressed rural area. People don't need college.

everybody needs college, everybody

Thing is, where I live it's not considered "financially appropriate" to marry young. It's considered a stupid thing to do, because it apparently limts your choices in life, or sets up up for divorce right from the start. I can't stand that people think that way, but they do.

It doesn't seem fair to me that in the old days, marrying at an age now considered "too young" was the entirely normal thing to do, and now people who do it can be considered foolish. I want to get married if I think I've met the one for me but I don't want my sister, brother and father to be on my back about it, telling me I'm ruining my life.

Also, I want to go to University, not because I think I need it but because I think I'd enjoy it, but I can see how it would get in the way of marriage as well.

Maybe you can see why an economically repressed rural area where people don't need college and can get married young strikes a very whimsical chord in me. It makes me wish I was a rural girl.

The truth is they're right. It does limit your choices, and statistically the highest divorce rates are in early marriages. The added responsibility, the fact that you are "theoretically" committing yourself for life, and your poor economic position as a young adult are all large hurdles. People would previously get married earlier because 35 meant you were a senior citizen, and people started dieing in their early 40s. Now 100 isn't uncommon. I can't see any advantage in living in an economically depressed area, rural or urban, nor in limiting your opportunities, skipping college, or getting married to your prom date.

 

[koban4max]

I maybe young but it feels like i've been fancying boys my whole life:o It feels like I'm never gunna get a guy becuase i started liking them at a very young age, and im kinda passionate, so i had serious crushes when i was like 8

I know dating is preparing for marrige, and I ideally want to get married after university, so i got a while to go, yet I wanna date while i'm still a teenager too Gods got a MASSIVE plan for me, so i can busy myself witht hat, its just waiting to be mature enough to date is so annoying when i fancie people and all my mates are dating I don't wanna give my heart away and i dont want my future husband to be one of millions who has had a piece of my heart, i've already made that mistake..but then I want to have a bit of expirience, and to meet some lovely guys ...

Thanks

katie

Y you waiting? HOw long ya gonna way? Just go out and find...plenty of fishes in the sea.

 

[Im_A]

I maybe young but it feels like i've been fancying boys my whole life:o It feels like I'm never gunna get a guy becuase i started liking them at a very young age, and im kinda passionate, so i had serious crushes when i was like 8

I know dating is preparing for marrige, and I ideally want to get married after university, so i got a while to go, yet I wanna date while i'm still a teenager too Gods got a MASSIVE plan for me, so i can busy myself witht hat, its just waiting to be mature enough to date is so annoying when i fancie people and all my mates are dating I don't wanna give my heart away and i dont want my future husband to be one of millions who has had a piece of my heart, i've already made that mistake..but then I want to have a bit of expirience, and to meet some lovely guys ...

Thanks

katie

i love the waiting because the meantime is enjoying life by myself, enjoying it with family and friends and no commitments that can take away the things i love doing and not responsibility of taking care of a woman and i can get financially better and just do the things i love doing.

i want things to go slow/mature speed in this area. i don't want wasted relationships that jump head first and all of a sudden the head gets decapitated because of how fast things move. had them before and i'll pass on "experiencing" that again. and i don't want a woman for my own weaknesses, or or to occupy that lonely spot deep in my heart (sarcasm but still the truth for me).

life for me is just fine waiting and when tomorrow comes, i predict it will be the same thing.

 

[simpletrust]

Don't you know thats what the devil wants for people we don't have to know everything about women and men to meet the right person theres nothing wrong with having healthy reltionships with friends but dating is degrading in a way. Becuase the more you date and have relationships the more your missing out on that experinace you can have with your future husbend or wife so trying to learn something is not fun beileve me it dosent help you find the right person everyone is diffrent so dating people will not help you find the right person. But forming good healthy relationships can help you get to know that person on a more real level. I hate that book kiss dating goodbye but the only thing i agree is that people need to diffrently kiss dating goodbye for sure cuase it leads people a stray and can ruine young peoples lives.

Believe me, I know learning some of these things isn't fun, I learned that first hand. But that doesn't mean I look back on the experience and just regret it completely and depress myself. (Except in the middle of the night when I lack perspective) Rather, I can see things I've learned that - I maintain - I'm glad to know. That may not apply to everyone but hey, I can only speak for myself and assume that it will apply to some other people as well.

everybody needs college, everybody


The truth is they're right. It does limit your choices, and statistically the highest divorce rates are in early marriages. The added responsibility, the fact that you are "theoretically" committing yourself for life, and your poor economic position as a young adult are all large hurdles. People would previously get married earlier because 35 meant you were a senior citizen, and people started dieing in their early 40s. Now 100 isn't uncommon. I can't see any advantage in living in an economically depressed area, rural or urban, nor in limiting your opportunities, skipping college, or getting married to your prom date.

I can see how marrying young limits certain possibilities, but why is it necessarily a bad thing? Marrying young comes with its own set of possibilities I'm sure. They learn different things. Who's to say which possibilities are the best for each person? An advantage I can see in living in such an area would be simply to have some peace and quiet. That may not be for everybody though.

 

[BeautifulWorshipper]

I don't know. I'm british, we dont date we just "go out" as in we are instantly boyfriend/girlfriend. I don't know, I'll take my chances and pray...

 

[koban4max]

Lol @ thread. nice topic though.