Alcoholics and Addicts Discussion/Support Thread

[SOTK]

Alcoholics drink because they are alcoholics, that's why. Like a smoker, once addicted you are addicted.

I am a believer in the VOID theory. We look to fill what we perceive as voids in our life with various substances or things to fill the voids (sex, $$$, drugs, etc.)
We believe these things will make us happy.

Our walk should be a spiritual one. Let it begin.....with me. Note the pause.
12-steps do work, if you work them. READ ODAT and The courage to change daily readings, give them a chance. What do you have to loose?

The VOID is the lack of having God in our life. I had something missing in my life as a drunk. I constantly had this empty feeling in the pit of my stomach, in my soul. I tried filling it up with alcohol- it didn't work. When I became a Christian, I found out that empty feeling in my life was not having a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.

 

[ArohaB]

Hey,
Can anyone offer support or advice if you are the spouse of someone who is addicted to alcohol?

 

[ephraimanesti]

Hey,
Can anyone offer support or advice if you are the spouse of someone who is addicted to alcohol?

MY DEAR SISTER IN CHRIST,

As a Recovering Alcoholic, i would advise you to hook up with a local Alanon Group A.S.A.P. for the support you need in coping with your husband's drinking. They also have an excellent Website--i am not sure of the "address of Alanon's Site, but you can find it quickly using GOOGLE.
Shop around for the Alanon Group where you fit--some are just rooms full of ranting and raving individuals using Meetings to vent their anger; others are full of healed and loving people who use the Meetings to bless and support each other in dealing with their common problem--their spouses' drinking/drugging.
Secondly, you of course need the Prayers and Support of your Brothers and Sisters in Christ. Sometimes, there is a feeling of shame connected with a spouse's drinking problem which keeps the suffering spouse from asking for the Prayerful support from others. i hope this is not the case with you--YOU ARE NOT THE CAUSE OF YOUR HUSBAND'S PROBLEM ANYMORE THAN MY WIFE WAS THE CAUSE OF MINE. (Alcoholics, incidentially, are quite adroit at blaming their drinking on spouses, children, friends, bosses, or anyone else they can think of to excuse themselves for what they are doing to themselves and those around them.) i hope you don't have these feelings of shame and responsibility and feel free to ask those your Fellowship with in Christ for their Prayers and support.
Lastly, PRAY, PRAY, PRAY, PRAY, for our Loving God to open your husband's eyes to what his drinking is doing to himself and to those around him, that he may turn from the darkness of his drinking into the light of our Lord's Healing Love.
i pray that you will continue to Love your husband, but you MUST detach yourself emotionally from the situation his drinking is causing in your home and its effects on you mentally, emotionally, and Spiritually. This is, of course, easier said than done--but it is do-able with practice. In this way you will not get sucked into his mind-games and his overt or covert mental/emotional abuse. KEEP YOURSELF FOCUSED ON GOD AND ALLOW HIM TO DEAL WITH YOUR HUSBAND--trying to do so yourself will tear you down--as perhaps you have already experienced.
Anyway, i could go on and on but i had better close so as not to get too long-winded or tedious. if i can be of any further help or support, please don't hesitate to P.M. me. If i don't have the answer, i am sure my long-suffering wife will!

MAY GOD'S BLESSINGS FLOW FORTH UPON YOU, HEALING YOUR HUSBAND AND GRANTING YOU PEACE,
ephraimanesti

 

[Phil413]

Tonight marks 6 years of me being free from alcohol.I wish I could use the words sober or drug & alcohol free, but that wouldn't come for another year and a half later. I do look at it as the night that God opened by eyes to all the convictions I had been living with for all those years, and the night that my life started moving in the right direction.So tonight I will take a brief moment to look back and see how far I've come. then I'll get on my knees and pray, and thank God for everything He has done to help get me to where I am today.Then, I'll pray for all those that are still suffering with their addictions,several in my immediate family, that God will open their eyes, convict their hearts, and give them the will and the resources to overcome them.

 

[Harlan Norris]

Chritmas marked the first year of my freedom from alchohol,two years for drugs.This freedom,granted by God.All it required was my honest repentance.It's a beautiful thing,freedom!My addiction to both was at one time extreme.As the years went by I did manage to get a handle on it.However there would be occasional forays into both drugs and booze, from time to time.Usually with embarrassing results.The thing that amazes me is the time I wasted on it.I finally took full responsibility for my behavior.Not blaming anyone else or any circumstances beyond my control.This was true repentance,which I believe is required, if one desires their freedom.Mine was granted.The desire for my addictions has disappeared.God is great! Praise God!

 

[cajunlady]

I was the most sickest crack-head that you could find. Sometimes when I reflect back on my past, it seems like that was someone else's life and not mines...(although I was someone else back then)...Thank you Jesus for saving my life...I could not stay sober without surrending to the Lord on a daily basis...May God bless you all...Keep the faith..

 

[SOTK]

I was the most sickest crack-head that you could find. Sometimes when I reflect back on my past, it seems like that was someone else's life and not mines...(although I was someone else back then)...Thank you Jesus for saving my life...I could not stay sober without surrending to the Lord on a daily basis...May God bless you all...Keep the faith..

Amen!

 

[cajunlady]

May God bless all of my sisters & brothers in recovery this beautiful day and grant them the strength that they need to make it one day at a time in Jesus's name..... Hugs to all of you..

 

[SOTK]

Right back at ya!

 

[oneforall]

Have you ever read the Beatitudes and the 12 steps side-by-side?

I think they same the same thing. I think God gave us AA and that's why it works. There is a lot of the Bible in the Big Book of AA and I'm sad to hear a few people at meetings denying that fact. But I guess it's to be expected.

The topic at the last meeting I went to was "AA and God". There wasn't one person there who said God is not in AA. Everyone admitted that God had rescued them, for that 24 hr. period, for the compulsion to drink.

*Now I have a friend who still drinks that thinks that AA is of the devil, but I have to remember that his alcohol enamored brain is trying to kill him, too. He's never had any lasting success at recovery.

For me, I find that I need AA along with the support of my Christian family. Just one, or the other, does not fill my program.

In AA my cohorts know that a higher power whom we call God has given his grace to them, but don't understand the backwards-of-the-world standards that I as a Christian woman I must adhere to. AA is where I gain the highly specialized tools necessary for recovery. Then, most of my church family has never struggled with addiction and simply can't fathom it's complex nature and identify with its utter demoralization. They know I'm a recovering soul and love me anyway. They're the ones who help me learn how to live.

I'm convinced that God has provided AA and blessed it. For the present time. The secularization of AA could change that, though.

My three cents,
oneforall

 

[ephraimanesti]

Have you ever read the Beatitudes and the 12 steps side-by-side?

I think they same the same thing. I think God gave us AA and that's why it works. There is a lot of the Bible in the Big Book of AA and I'm sad to hear a few people at meetings denying that fact. But I guess it's to be expected.

The topic at the last meeting I went to was "AA and God". There wasn't one person there who said God is not in AA. Everyone admitted that God had rescued them, for that 24 hr. period, for the compulsion to drink.

*Now I have a friend who still drinks that thinks that AA is of the devil, but I have to remember that his alcohol enamored brain is trying to kill him, too. He's never had any lasting success at recovery.

For me, I find that I need AA along with the support of my Christian family. Just one, or the other, does not fill my program.

In AA my cohorts know that a higher power whom we call God has given his grace to them, but don't understand the backwards-of-the-world standards that I as a Christian woman I must adhere to. AA is where I gain the highly specialized tools necessary for recovery. Then, most of my church family has never struggled with addiction and simply can't fathom it's complex nature and identify with its utter demoralization. They know I'm a recovering soul and love me anyway. They're the ones who help me learn how to live.

I'm convinced that God has provided AA and blessed it. For the present time. The secularization of AA could change that, though.

My three cents,
oneforall

MY DEAR SISTER IN CHRIST,

PRAISE GOD FOR THE WISDOM OF YOUR POST! You are exactly right in all respects! The secularization of A.A. has killed many Meetings and threatens the Movement itself. The idea that, "Yo, Dude, you can use your Goldfish as your Higher Power if you want" is a Satanic assault on the very purpose and power of A.A.--to bring sufferers to God. That is the whole purpose of A.A. and the very reason why it works. Without God, it is just another empty and powerless philosophy and, as you know, empty philosophies never got anyone sober.
There is no doubt in my mind that God used Bill W, Dr. Bob, and all the original A.A. members who helped give A.A. its focus, structure, and contributed to the putting together of the Basic Text, for the purpose of bringing those outside the Church--who were suffering and dying in the gutters--into the light of God's Truth and His Healing Will for their lives. To my thinking, the Basic Text of Alcoholics Anonymous is the Bible for drunks.
You are also quite correct that a person in Recovery needs both A.A. and Church to facilitate both their Recovery process and their Spiritual growth. As you say, the two balance out and compliment each other marvelously--helping the Recoverying person fulfill what Our Lord said were the TWO GREATEST COMMANDMENTS--"Love the Lord your God, with all your heart, mind, soul, and spirit"(Church) and "Love your neighbor as yourself"(A.A.).
So, let's pray for A.A. and all other 12-Step Programs that the trend towards secularizations may be reversed before more damage is done.
THANK YOU FOR THIS POST!

IN CHRIST'S PRECIOUS HEALING LOVE,
ephraimanesti

 

[LoG]

I think the trend towards seculerization will happen if we abandon the meetings. It seems to happen a lot that people sober up in AA, then move on to a church and neglect to continue on in AA to give back what was so freely given. Ten years or so ago when I had been clean and sober for a couple of years the issue came up for me. I struggled with it for awhile but the verses:

Mar 5:18 As he was getting into the boat, the man who had been demon-possessed kept begging him to let him go with him.
Mar 5:19 But Jesus wouldn't let him. Instead, he told him, "Go home to your family, and tell them how much the Lord has done for you and how merciful he has been to you."

continued to come up for me. I stayed with AA as a result. I did pray for the Lord to show me other believers that attended the meetings. He did and I must say I was surprised how many there actually were.
As former alcoholics and drug addicts we who were weak and foolish are given powerful tools for furthering the Kingdom in the place where God came to us.

 

[ephraimanesti]

I think the trend towards seculerization will happen if we abandon the meetings. It seems to happen a lot that people sober up in AA, then move on to a church and neglect to continue on in AA to give back what was so freely given. Ten years or so ago when I had been clean and sober for a couple of years the issue came up for me. I struggled with it for awhile but the verses:

Mar 5:18 As he was getting into the boat, the man who had been demon-possessed kept begging him to let him go with him.
Mar 5:19 But Jesus wouldn't let him. Instead, he told him, "Go home to your family, and tell them how much the Lord has done for you and how merciful he has been to you."

continued to come up for me. I stayed with AA as a result. I did pray for the Lord to show me other believers that attended the meetings. He did and I must say I was surprised how many there actually were.
As former alcoholics and drug addicts we who were weak and foolish are given powerful tools for furthering the Kingdom in the place where God came to us.

A M E N!
​

LOVE AND SOBRIETY TO YA,
ephraimaneesti

 

[SOTK]

I think the trend towards seculerization will happen if we abandon the meetings. It seems to happen a lot that people sober up in AA, then move on to a church and neglect to continue on in AA to give back what was so freely given. Ten years or so ago when I had been clean and sober for a couple of years the issue came up for me. I struggled with it for awhile but the verses:

Mar 5:18 As he was getting into the boat, the man who had been demon-possessed kept begging him to let him go with him.
Mar 5:19 But Jesus wouldn't let him. Instead, he told him, "Go home to your family, and tell them how much the Lord has done for you and how merciful he has been to you."

continued to come up for me. I stayed with AA as a result. I did pray for the Lord to show me other believers that attended the meetings. He did and I must say I was surprised how many there actually were.
As former alcoholics and drug addicts we who were weak and foolish are given powerful tools for furthering the Kingdom in the place where God came to us.

I would tend to agree. I have also stayed with AA although I will admit that I am not involved as much as I once was. I needed a Church family and to have fellowship with believers. I was a Christian for almost 3 years without having a Church family and fellowship with believers. I came to see that this was unhealthy for me as well as unbiblical.

I made similar decision. I decided that I needed to be active at my Church and active in AA, however, I knew that by making this decision my involvement in AA would lessen. I think that has been fine. In fact, it's been a great thing!

We do indeed have an obligation to stick with A.A. We have an obligation to newcomers and to God. A.A. is indeed where the message of Christ's salvation came to me. Praise Christ!

 

[Terri]

I have been having obsessive thoughts about suicide and have started drinking when my anxiety level gets so high that I fear I will hurt myself.

I've only been drinking for about 2 months. Would AA be of any benefit to me?

 

[SOTK]

I have been having obsessive thoughts about suicide and have started drinking when my anxiety level gets so high that I fear I will hurt myself.

I've only been drinking for about 2 months. Would AA be of any benefit to me?

I seriously doubt you are an alcoholic if you have only been drinking for 2 months, however, you are definitely taking your problems to the bottle and not the Lord.

Suicidal thoughts and depression are not good. I would suggest you spend some serious time with God and seek spiritual counsel with your Pastor. You could also check into Christian Counseling. If you do not have a Christian Mentor, I would suggest getting one. Pick somebody who has had similar problems with alcohol and has become free of this.

Going to AA wouldn't be a bad thing. It just doesn't seem like you need it at this point. You are drinking for the wrong reasons. That much is certain, but I doubt you are an alcoholic yet.

I will be praying for you, my friend.

 

[ephraimanesti]

I have been having obsessive thoughts about suicide and have started drinking when my anxiety level gets so high that I fear I will hurt myself.

I've only been drinking for about 2 months. Would AA be of any benefit to me?

MY DEAR FRIEND IN CHRIST,

The Primary Purpose of A.A. is to lead people to God through the use of the 12-Steps. Since i assume that you are already a Christian, i would think that this purpose has already been served.
What is needed is for you to find someone to talk to, and get support and guidance from, in dealing with your thoughts of suicide. Do you have a Pastor/Elder/Priest/Deacon or someone under whose Spiritual Authority you are who can provide you with the guidance and support you need? If not, how about finding a Counselor who can assistance you in dealing with your feelings of suicide. If you don't know any Counselors, your Family Doctor can provide you with a referral.
Given that feelings of suicide are primarily a Spiritual problem, your best course of action in addition to getting the support suggested above, is to examine your relationship with God to see if perhaps there is a missing piece that is causing the problem. All Christian Bookstores have books dealing with Suicidality from a Christian perspective, and these would be of help to you in discovering the course of action you need to follow Spiritually to deal with, and defeat, these negative thoughts.
As you must be aware, suicidal thoughts come from the Evil One and they are his attempt turn us from the Light and Love of God and to lead us into darkness and destroy us. i pray that you will QUICKLY take the steps necessary to keep this from happening. MAY GOD HAVE MERCY AND ENFOLD YOU IN HIS LOVE! Please feel free to PM me if you need to talk!

MUCH LOVE FROM THE CENTER OF CHRIST,
ephraimanesti

 

[LoG]

I have been having obsessive thoughts about suicide and have started drinking when my anxiety level gets so high that I fear I will hurt myself.

I've only been drinking for about 2 months. Would AA be of any benefit to me?

Hi Terri,

Have you ever drank or drugged in the past and then stopped? Some people who are actually alcoholic or addicts are able to stop for periods of time measured in months or years even, only to revert back to it when stress levels get to a point where it is the only option they know of to cope. This is especially true I think for people who find the Lord through a church.
Through AA one can learn to apply the Steps to one's life which helps to identify areas where one may need to repent and look to the Lord for healing from self-defeating character defects.

Another difficult area is for those who either grew up in an alcoholic home or are presently in a relationship with one. These type of people are also susceptable to subconciously thinking that alcohol may provide a solution to the turmoil they are in because it seems to be working for a significant other, whether in the past or present. If this is the case Al-Anon could be a solution.

These are both areas I needed help in myself over the years and by attending meetings was able to find support from others that had similar experiences and feelings and learn to apply the Steps to my life on an ongoing basis.

 

[ArmouredSaint]

Working on being a positive force for others here to stop using their preferred drug but I need some prayer.I just don't have the fight left in me right now. I live in a crazy area and everyone around me is high.Daily.

 

[LoG]

Working on being a positive force for others here to stop using their preferred drug but I need some prayer.I just don't have the fight left in me right now. I live in a crazy area and everyone around me is high.Daily.

Kudos for your efforts Saint. Alcohol and drugs are the visible symptoms of the problem. For them to just stop their use still leaves them with an inability to cope with life.
One thing I've learned over the years is that you can only help those that want it. For those that don't, the only effective thing is to pray for them. Harping on them that they need to stop only antagonizes and combined with their pride will push them even further away. Plus it wears one out quickly trying to drag a horse to water so to speak.
In AA they say it's about attraction rather than promotion. Take care of yourself first and you'll be a much more effective warrior in the fight.
You are one only person and can only do so much. Multiply your efforts by finding out where the druggies can get help. Local AA or NA meetings, Community services, church groups that may have programs etc.