Thanks for your response as always. Very insightful. Hopefully the guy will become a distant memory like some other guys of the past. Throughout my life there are only a handful of guys that I have fallen deeply for. He is number five. There's guys that I have been crushed by, but very few leave a cerebral impression like he did. I wouldn't be surprised if it was vice versa since he said I was the first person he ever had a cerebral relationship with. And it's always possible that we will cross paths again, and I pray that I am in a much better place when and if that time comes. As far as social media, I think the door is closed since you can't even send him a friend request. He said he's only got a small circle of friends.
I'm sorry! I intended to post you earlier but
@SarahsKnight distracted me and required medical assistance. He's resting comfortably at St. Mungo's.
Haha. I understand. Hopefully
@SarahsKnight is getting the rest that he needs.
Trades happen for two reasons: To help you climb or when you've arrived. He wasn't content financially and had already taken odd jobs to fatten the coffers. The lone choice was earning more or bringing in someone who did.
yes I do think he was desperate financially. And the gal that he made the connection with, I think was of a higher income since she was divorced twice to guys that were maybe 15 years. I also had done a background check and it put her income as 30k or so higher than his and she had all the right outfits... Her house is still for sale and is underpriced. It should be over a million dollars. The daughter seem to have sort of a privileged life also and is in college now. She may have had a privileged upbringing since she was originally from the East Coast, and one of her high School pictures looks like a well to do home. He made a trade for something he told me he never would do which is to date someone that is a couple states away, she's even further. Which means they only get to see each other every two weeks. They did break up at one point, and I'm sure it was because of the distance. He also has a bad temper that he is on medication for and my perception is that he was the one to try to get her back 3 to 4 months later. Probably because there is not much of a market online or elsewhere at his age.
He had a price tag for pretty much everything. The price of the brakes getting fixed while he was on his timeshare was quite a bit for his range rover. He forgot one of his coolers and bought another one like it was nothing, I can't remember the name brand right now but I know there's two $200 or so. He was totally pulling away from me when he was on his timeshare... I really couldn't figure it out but during that time when I finally got back online I saw that he had blocked me.. which might explain the other gaps in our relationship when he would just disappear. He did after the first date and apologize profusely Weeks later. I never understood if he had mentally withdrawn or he had gone searching for someone else. He told me more than one time that he wavered on me being a long-term prospect.
I was very prudent on the physical and the potential of visiting his place. I know this was a high point of contention.
Trades happen for two reasons: To help you climb or when you've arrived. He wasn't content financially and had already taken odd jobs to fatten the coffers. The lone choice was earning more or bringing in someone who did.
yes I might agree. My friend that had seen the beach house that he built, said she didn't understand why he was at their place trying to hook up their wi-fi. It was a second home for a couple that had another home down south. Originally he was going to need my help with moving a table, he was making an excuse so I could use their shower after my run at the sand dunes before our date. He had a long established relationship with that couple though, since they were his first clients.
Basically. He provides a service and they pay him. But that isn't a line of work most can do without feeling the same. Not if you want to be in their shoes.
yes I might agree. Looking back at old pictures it seems like his ex-wife might have been the one to help him keep up the image. I wouldn't be surprised if she was the one to help him select his clothes. I thought maybe he had a good sense of dress, until a discussion we had at work about most of the wives picking out their men's outfits. I remember him once sending a picture while he was working on a house, and his outfit looked a little bit dorky to me. Also one of the hats that he would wear in his convertible, I also thought was not the best choice. And when he offered me one of his hats once, I told him I brought my own because I didn't like the look of it. I kind of think he was offended.
Yes. The preparation isn't solely with the goal in mind. You want her to fit in any scenario. Top ups occur if you're dealing with cultural differences or special situations that require different protocols
Yes, this makes sense.
Lineage is smiled upon in the dating market. It was a nod to reflected glory and an early sign of a different attitude. Silence is a clever way of disapproving without admitting it.
Looking back I understand this now. I really didn't see his lineage as any better than mine. But now I understand, whereas my family did not lead to as much wealth as his. My family did at one time have quite a bit with bootlegging, but I think it was lost over time. We still have our family farm though.
It might have been a test to gauge your familiarity. It sounds like a social club.
Yes I think it was, and I will understand that in the future. Being on his social media for a year gave me more insight to some of the questions that I had. The social club that he's part of, it runs probably over a thousand at least per year, and you have to know 2 to 3 members. I thought maybe it was maybe his clients, but I saw that when he did his once a year visit for his birthday during the breakup, he was talking to guys that work there. I find it interesting that I think they are gay plus the clients that he talks to the most are also a gay couple. Not that it means anything, but I found it strange with his background as a Christian and his associations. I think when we were talking he wanted to take me to the couples beach house, but it was way past my bedtime.. that healthwise I couldn't at the time. This was another area of contention, his late hours and my early hours.
I still kind of don't understand how he pays that much money for the social club, yet he only goes possibly once a year. It's not even that far away (there's a network of them) compared to the girlfriend he has.
Animals as status symbols. For whose benefit?
yeah, I can't remember the name of the dog but it sort of reminds me of the video that you had of preppy lifestyle. I think they are a hunting dog with floppy ears.
Maybe he wanted to impress you. Most are tight lipped about their spending. They'll mention smaller stuff. And gardening in $200 jeans is a subtle nod to privilege. You're not worried about ruining them. You can buy more.
yes he definitely was all about impressions. I found it so odd at the beginning of his conversations with me, how he would keep slipping in different status things. To me I saw it as a red flag from the beginning that he considered himself the mayor, but his title was president. I would try to correct him on that, but he pretty much ignored that it would not admit.
His behavior is elitist. Social climbers are overly concerned with appearances. They want to look the part and gain acceptance.
yes I think so. Thanks for helping me think through more of this.
I'm happy to do so and please pray on my behalf. I'm not looking but you never know. I haven't spoken to amigo 3 (my nickname for the bunch) in a few years. He's the tech CIO I mentioned in the past. There was a moment today when I noticed a shift in his demeanor. I'll see what he does.
I definitely will be praying and wrote it down on my prayer journal. We all need to be praying for each other. There's so much power in prayer and looking to the Lord.
He said something about online dating I'm going to share. He's a bit outspoken but spot on.
Many women want Prince Charming to pluck them out of obscurity and turn them into a pretty pretty princess. Just as many weak men (on here) are looking for some misguided but uncommonly beautiful fool of a woman to give herself to him magically transforming him into the alpha of all alphas.
Both are chasing fairy tales. It doesn’t work like that. You gotta make yourself into the person that deserves the mate you want.
Again cart...horse...switch places.
I like this. Very true
