29 & Never Dated

[DragonFox91]

Absolutely it has. Is it the same for you?

Oh yes, for sure. I think some of it too is just kids are so immature. I wanted conversations growing up. Kids don't really do that. Being w/ kids who want to joke around & goof off, & I didn't, those situations made me anxious!! Among so many other things that did.

Also, I got medication a few years & that's really helped. There's times where I don't think it does or it doesn't work as well as it used, but I think that's more related to my dating/marriage anxieties then more general or social anxieties.

Weird, isn't it? I noticed it as well. I sort of expected the opposite when I started posting here. Where are all the women hiding?

No idea!
I expected it to be about even on here.

That's very strange. I've always experienced the opposite at the churches I've attended. More single girls than single guys, almost without exception. Which I thought was due to the statistical fact that there are simply more female believers than male, but maybe not. It could just be a perception thing? Like, there are actually equal amounts of both, but it seems like there are more of one or the other, depending on what gender you are? Or maybe it's because I'm in Canada and you're in the States? We should switch locations. lol

Oh no, it's definitely not a perception thing at the churches I've attended.

You'd definitely want to switch locations w/ me because at one of the churches I go to, the men there (outside of me & my friend) are all cowboy-types. You know the kinds of men that are on The Bachelor TV show? They're like those men. Which is why the man:woman ratio there is so crazy to me b/c I think 'there's all these single men I bet single women would love to meet, but there's only one woman in the class!'

I've heard of that 'more female believers than male.' I'll have to dig into that some. I think it could be there's certain demographics that skew that number.

 

[DragonFox91]

Found some encouraging quotes related to the topic:

"If it's God's will, it'll happen. You don't need to compete to be in anybody's life."
"What God has for you will not be given to someone else."
"If you have to fight for their attention or a spot in their life, that's a proof it isn't God's will."
"Wait on God, trust in his Word. It'll happen in his time."

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

Also, I got medication a few years & that's really helped. There's times where I don't think it does or it doesn't work as well as it used, but I think that's more related to my dating/marriage anxieties then more general or social anxieties.

Have you tried therapy or counselling as well? I found it very helpful. Especially in combination with medication. Meditation is good as well, but it's difficult to focus. I really need to work on that.

You'd definitely want to switch locations w/ me because at one of the churches I go to, the men there (outside of me & my friend) are all cowboy-types. You know the kinds of men that are on The Bachelor TV show? They're like those men. Which is why the man:woman ratio there is so crazy to me b/c I think 'there's all these single men I bet single women would love to meet, but there's only one woman in the class!'

Never actually watched that show. I would LOVE to live on a farm (if they're literally like cowboys), but I'm not sure rural jock types are really what I go for. I like men who are quiet and intellectual, but still "manly" and confident. Especially if they also enjoy outdoor activities. Now an intellectual cowboy? I'd be all over that. LOL

I've heard of that 'more female believers than male.' I'll have to dig into that some. I think it could be there's certain demographics that skew that number.

Quite possibly. I'm not really sure where the numbers come from. It always seemed to me that in the past, men were the more religious gender.

 

[DragonFox91]

Have you tried therapy or counselling as well? I found it very helpful. Especially in combination with medication. Meditation is good as well, but it's difficult to focus. I really need to work on that.

I see a counselor, not so much for general/social anxiety b/c those don't affect me as much, but for the whole dating thing. I only started going a few years ago. I wish I had seen a psychologist when I was younger. My parents didn't really believe in them tho, but they said they would've taken me if I had asked.

Never actually watched that show. I would LOVE to live on a farm (if they're literally like cowboys), but I'm not sure rural jock types are really what I go for. I like men who are quiet and intellectual, but still "manly" and confident. Especially if they also enjoy outdoor activities. Now an intellectual cowboy? I'd be all over that. LOL

These men are definitely intellectual & enjoy outdoor activities. I don't know about quiet, but I don't think they're jock types either. They're very humble. I don't watch The Bachelor either, I'm just familiar w/ the kind of men who are on it.

Quite possibly. I'm not really sure where the numbers come from. It always seemed to me that in the past, men were the more religious gender.

Apparently now it's the opposite.

 

[DragonFox91]

Lately when I've been praying, I feel confident he'll give me one. He's a good God! I haven't been putting him at the center. My life needs to revolve around him, not the desire for a girlfriend. A girl will come in time. I need to count my blessings I do presently have. I tell him I want to meet her, but he wants me to be patient.

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

These men are definitely intellectual & enjoy outdoor activities. I don't know about quiet, but I don't think they're jock types either. They're very humble. I don't watch The Bachelor either, I'm just familiar w/ the kind of men who are on it.

I just realized you live in Michigan. My aunt and her family live in Michigan, in Lapeer County. She's tried to set me up with single men from their church a few times. Maybe they are like these men you're talking about. lol

 

[DragonFox91]

I just realized you live in Michigan. My aunt and her family live in Michigan, in Lapeer County. She's tried to set me up with single men from their church a few times. Maybe they are like these men you're talking about. lol

Say yes!! I wish someone tried to hook me up.

Lapeer.....I think that's Flint's county......

I am on the west side of the state. The good side of the state

 

[ReesePiece23]

Closest I've been is Chicago - where I had an advantage with my British accent. I was surprised to be honest, because I'd of thought a city like that would be used to us by now. (We're really nothing special, most of us are complete scum.)

Alas, a girl followed me around Walgreens for about ten minutes whilst she pretended to stack shelves next to me. And she wasn't the only one who turned odd as soon as I opened my mouth.

It's the only place in America where I've experienced that sort of attention to be honest. Could be a coincidence I suppose.

 

[DragonFox91]

Closest I've been is Chicago - where I had an advantage with my British accent. I was surprised to be honest, because I'd of thought a city like that would be used to us by now. (We're really nothing special, most of us are complete scum.)

Alas, a girl followed me around Walgreens for about ten minutes whilst she pretended to stack shelves next to me. And she wasn't the only one who turned odd as soon as I opened my mouth.

It's the only place in America where I've experienced that sort of attention to be honest. Could be a coincidence I suppose.

Closest you've been to what? I thought you have ex's.

You should've asked that Walgreens girl!!! BUt maybe t'was all in your head?

There's lots of British/Canadians/foreigners/etc. in Florida! I think they're usually on vacation, but Canadians have a separate, winter home there.

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

Say yes!! I wish someone tried to hook me up.

It didn't work out at the time because this was when I lived a 9 hour drive away from the Michigan-Ontario border. I've recently moved much closer, but of course the border is closed now. Go figure.

Lapeer.....I think that's Flint's county......

I am on the west side of the state. The good side of the state

Yes, Flint is nearby. I've been there. Feel bad for people living in Flint. It's so run down. Not surprised they had lead in their drinking water, tbh.

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

Closest you've been to what? I thought you have ex's.

You should've asked that Walgreens girl!!! BUt maybe t'was all in your head?

There's lots of British/Canadians/foreigners/etc. in Florida! I think they're usually on vacation, but Canadians have a separate, winter home there.

I think he means the closest he's been to Michigan.

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

Closest I've been is Chicago - where I had an advantage with my British accent. I was surprised to be honest, because I'd of thought a city like that would be used to us by now. (We're really nothing special, most of us are complete scum.)

Alas, a girl followed me around Walgreens for about ten minutes whilst she pretended to stack shelves next to me. And she wasn't the only one who turned odd as soon as I opened my mouth.

It's the only place in America where I've experienced that sort of attention to be honest. Could be a coincidence I suppose.

Lots of American and Canadian girls (and guys?) like British accents. I watch tons of British TV, so barely even notice when someone has a British accent. I get the appeal, however.

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

Sorry DragonFox. I feel like I've sort of hijacked your thread. But at least it seems like there's less room for misery in here now. lol

 

[DragonFox91]

Trying to stay optimistic but it's not easy!

It didn't work out at the time because this was when I lived a 9 hour drive away from the Michigan-Ontario border. I've recently moved much closer, but of course the border is closed now. Go figure.



Yes, Flint is nearby. I've been there. Feel bad for people living in Flint. It's so run down. Not surprised they had lead in their drinking water, tbh.

Have you been to Michigan? People are usually surprised to find out I've never been to Canada. Especially my Detroit buddies. What can I say, Windsor isn't outside my window like it is their's.

Sorry DragonFox. I feel like I've sort of hijacked your thread. But at least it seems like there's less room for misery in here now. lol

It's ok. I was sort of hijacking it when I commented there's a lot of Canadians in Florida. Certainly not a lot here in West Michigan.

I don't like British accents. It sounds too proper for me. I like Boston & Southern accents the best!

 

[ReesePiece23]

Closest you've been to what? I thought you have ex's.

You should've asked that Walgreens girl!!! BUt maybe t'was all in your head?

There's lots of British/Canadians/foreigners/etc. in Florida! I think they're usually on vacation, but Canadians have a separate, winter home there.

Closest I've been to Michigan.

Walgreens girl, was... Well, a girl. Probably no older than 18 when I was 27. So it would have been slightly irresponsible of me to take advantage - especially when I was only passing through. I was backpacking at the time, I think I was in Hong Kong a fortnight or so later.

Ah, life before COVID lol.

And it wasn't in my head - I couldn't of written it if I tried. I tested her by going back down the same isles multiple times, as I was honestly interested to see how far she was willing to go.

All over the store and back round again as it would turn out. With her mystical hands of imaginary shelf stacking.

 

[ReesePiece23]

so barely even notice when someone has a British accent. I get the appeal, however.

I can't say I notice American accents much. Well, except in Brooklyn because that's obvious when they ask you "how do you want your cawfee?" I usually say "builders mate, one lump."

 

[DragonFox91]

Closest I've been to Michigan.

Walgreens girl, was... Well, a girl. Probably no older than 18 when I was 27. So it would have been slightly irresponsible of me to take advantage - especially when I was only passing through. I was backpacking at the time, I think I was in Hong Kong a fortnight or so later.

Ah, life before COVID lol.

And it wasn't in my head - I couldn't of written it if I tried. I tested her by going back down the same isles multiple times, as I was honestly interested to see how far she was willing to go.

All over the store and back round again as it would turn out. With her mystical hands of imaginary shelf stacking.

Could've at least said Hi.

 

[ReesePiece23]

Could've at least said Hi.

You're not her are you?

 

[DragonFox91]

You're not her are you?

No

IDK, you may've made the right choice. What if she was 16 & called the cops on you for harassment?

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

Have you been to Michigan? People are usually surprised to find out I've never been to Canada. Especially my Detroit buddies. What can I say, Windsor isn't outside my window like it is their's.

Yeah, I've been to Michigan many, many times to visit family. My parents used to take us almost monthly when I was a kid. Meh. Windsor's nothing special as Ontario cities go. You're not missing anything. But you should definitely at least see Niagara Falls from the Canadian side. It's much better. I know I'm biased, but I've heard many Americans say the same.