Should A Christian Man Marry A Divorced Woman?

[fwGod]

I guess the solution to all of this legalism is to just murder one's spouse instead of divorcing him/her and then there would be no question as to whether or not it's okay to get married again since there is no longer a spouse to be in dispute over. After all, plenty of murderers took wives and God seemed to have no problem with that and even called some of them righteous and/or after his own heart.

If you are talking about secular circumstances.. God had no part in their marriage and had no part in one marriage partner killing the other. That is not to say that such civil marriages cannot be moral and loving and enjoyable.. all to the best of their ability. Which can be worth the respect of all.

The king of England killed one wife in order to marry another. That was because religious legalism wouldn't allow him to Biblically divorce her. He's a classic of having waned in his affection to his wife [see my post #99 Should A Christian Man Marry A Divorced Woman? ]
so his eyes roamed to fix on another. What religious legalism hoped to avoid.. adultery.. he had Biblically, morally or would it be immorally? committed anyway. Plus murder. The religious legalism didn't stop him from doing that. How can they therefore to have presided over his next marriage to sanction it?

 

[PaulCyp1]

If the marriage was only a legal contract, then it can be ended by legal divorce. If the marriage was sacramental, involving a solemn promise to God by the couple, to be faithful to each other in good times and in bad, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, until death, then that is what God expects of them and will hold them to that promise. Gong through the motions of a civil divorce cannot nullify a sacrament of the Church, or a promise made to God. Therefore, going through the motions of a civil divorce doesn't change anything. They are still married in God's eyes, and therefore cannot enter into a relationship with someone other than their spouse, without committing adultery.

 

[Mark Quayle]

Is this scripture below saying a Christian man should only marry a divorced woman if her divorce was because of sexual immorality or a Christian man should never marry a divorced woman full stop?
If the man does marry a divorced women would that mean his sins are going to be continuous in adultery as long as he is in that relationship, just as if someone carried on with fornication or any other sin after coming to and accepting Christ. Which would then make his sinning wilful after being saved.

31"Furthermore it has been said,
"Whoever divorces his wife, let him give
her a certificate of divorce.'
32But I say to you that whoever divorces
his wife for any reason except sexual
immorality causes her to commit
adultery; and whoever marries a woman
who is divorced commits adultery.

"But I call you to peace." I Cor. 7:15

 

[RDKirk]

If the marriage was only a legal contract, then it can be ended by legal divorce. If the marriage was sacramental, involving a solemn promise to God by the couple, to be faithful to each other in good times and in bad, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, until death, then that is what God expects of them and will hold them to that promise. Gong through the motions of a civil divorce cannot nullify a sacrament of the Church, or a promise made to God. Therefore, going through the motions of a civil divorce doesn't change anything. They are still married in God's eyes, and therefore cannot enter into a relationship with someone other than their spouse, without committing adultery.

What if one of the two was lying in his or her heart when making the vow? What if one of them had completely and deliberately lied about his or her intentions from the very beginning, such as marrying someone strictly for money.

Does God have part in a lie? Does God make a lie sacred?

 

[PeterDona]

What if one of the two was lying in his or her heart when making the vow? What if one of them had completely and deliberately lied about his or her intentions from the very beginning, such as marrying someone strictly for money.

Does God have part in a lie? Does God make a lie sacred?

Yes he does. At least if you consider the deceptive covenant between the israelites and the gibeonites. God upheld that covenant even if at least one party was deceived into the covenant
Gibeonites - Amazing Bible Timeline with World History

 

[bèlla]

There will never be a clear consensus on the subject in the church. The majority who say remarriage is acceptable are divorced, remarried, or in the process of doing so. They have the largest voice on the topic.

Singles rarely say the same unless they’re dating someone from that group. Married couples who’ve never divorced aren’t championing it either.

God often lays burdens on our hearts where direct benefit isn’t evident. I don’t see a lot of advocacy on the topic from those outside the fold.

Yours in His Service,

~Bella

 

[SamanthaAnastasia]

Is this scripture below saying a Christian man should only marry a divorced woman if her divorce was because of sexual immorality or a Christian man should never marry a divorced woman full stop?
If the man does marry a divorced women would that mean his sins are going to be continuous in adultery as long as he is in that relationship, just as if someone carried on with fornication or any other sin after coming to and accepting Christ. Which would then make his sinning wilful after being saved.

31"Furthermore it has been said,
"Whoever divorces his wife, let him give
her a certificate of divorce.'
32But I say to you that whoever divorces
his wife for any reason except sexual
immorality causes her to commit
adultery; and whoever marries a woman
who is divorced commits adultery.

There are a lot of different scenarios that lead up to divorce.
What if the husband left and abandoned the divorced woman? What if the husband asked her for divorce first? What if he committed adultery against the divorced woman? What if she came to Christ after her divorce? What if he was abusive to the point of life threatening?
It is not just black and white.

To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her.
13 And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him.
14 For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.
12 Corinthians 7

 

[Blade]

if its really truth we want.. you wont like it. God has never wanted divorce. He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.

Truth is its between them and God. If were looking at Matt-John..a Jesus was talking to Jewish people that were at that time living by the law. Yet look at the ones Christ forgave.

You confess your sin (sins) and He is faithful and just to forgive you your sins and cleans you from all unrighteousness. You don't live in the past.. can't change it. Get up dust off keep going. Its not what MAN thinks its what your Father does. We please Him.

Divorce.. me... Still married about 40 years of being together. Only one sin He will not forgive and sorry divorce is not it. Doesn't matter what any of us say.. against thee and only thee do I sin and do this evil in your sight.

This is not a questions you can just say NO or YES to. Were talking about REAL people and as one here said.. there is so many "different scenarios" here.

 

[Francis Drake]

But I say to you that everyone divorcing his wife, except on account of sexual immorality, causes her to commit adultery. And whoever shall marry her who has been divorced commits adultery.

I think this has to be the most telling verse in the whole discussion.

Although adultery was punishable as a sin, if adultery through remarriage is imposed by others, the Lord does not count it as sin.

Here's the story of Naaman, speaking to Elisha after being healed of leprosy.
2Kings5v17So Naaman said, “Then, if not, please let your servant be given two mule-loads of earth; for your servant will no longer offer either burnt offering or sacrifice to other gods, but to the Lord. 18Yet in this thing may the Lord pardon your servant: when my master goes into the temple of Rimmon to worship there, and he leans on my hand, and I bow down in the temple of Rimmon—when I bow down in the temple of Rimmon, may the Lord please pardon your servant in this thing.”
And Elisha's response.-
19Then he said to him, “Go in peace.” So he departed from him a short distance.
In other words, there was no guilt attached to an involuntary sin.

 

[Francis Drake]

There will never be a clear consensus on the subject in the church. The majority who say remarriage is acceptable are divorced, remarried, or in the process of doing so. They have the largest voice on the topic.

Singles rarely say the same unless they’re dating someone from that group. Married couples who’ve never divorced aren’t championing it either.

God often lays burdens on our hearts where direct benefit isn’t evident. I don’t see a lot of advocacy on the topic from those outside the fold.

Yours in His Service,

~Bella

Long before divorce came to my doorstep, I had worked out from scripture that remarriage was acceptable. I also saw and counselled too many suffering saints being persecuted by self righteous legalists not to at least look at it from the basis of mercy and grace.

 

[RDKirk]

Yes he does. At least if you consider the deceptive covenant between the israelites and the gibeonites. God upheld that covenant even if at least one party was deceived into the covenant
Gibeonites - Amazing Bible Timeline with World History

The Gibeonites, however, deceived the Israelites only in order to survive, not to do harm or ill to them. And the Gibeonites made good of their part in the covenant. They are, if anything, like the pagan husband who is pleased with his Christian wife and willing to live with her Christian ways and activities.

 

[RDKirk]

There will never be a clear consensus on the subject in the church. The majority who say remarriage is acceptable are divorced, remarried, or in the process of doing so. They have the largest voice on the topic.

Singles rarely say the same unless they’re dating someone from that group. Married couples who’ve never divorced aren’t championing it either.

God often lays burdens on our hearts where direct benefit isn’t evident. I don’t see a lot of advocacy on the topic from those outside the fold.

Yours in His Service,

~Bella

That's why is a blessing that the Son came in the flesh.

 

[PeterDona]

The Gibeonites, however, deceived the Israelites only in order to survive, not to do harm or ill to them. And the Gibeonites made good of their part in the covenant. They are, if anything, like the pagan husband who is pleased with his Christian wife and willing to live with her Christian ways and activities.

yeah, well I was just jumping into the conversation when I felt I had something interesting to contribute. I did not read up on all the previous posts.
If I may say it like that, you seem to view marriage more in a situational perspective. I would not have connected those 2 bible passages ever I think.
Interestingly, in the greek language there is not a precise word for covenant, so even in the NT it is translated diathekon, which is more like a contract type of word.

As to the 1 cor 7:15 verse, I will some day pull up a discussion, but still preparing, so I will not go into details here. You might want to take part at that time.

blessings

 

[solid_core]

Apples and oranges.

Also, please remember the unforgiving debtor parable Matthew 18:21-35.

So, regarding money and debts, God would want you to live a miserable life till your debt is paid,
but regarding the wedding promise, God does not want you to suffer, but life a full and marry life with anybody you will meet?

Why do you think that marriage is, in God's eyes, so easily dismissed?

 

[GraceBro]

Is this scripture below saying a Christian man should only marry a divorced woman if her divorce was because of sexual immorality or a Christian man should never marry a divorced woman full stop?
If the man does marry a divorced women would that mean his sins are going to be continuous in adultery as long as he is in that relationship, just as if someone carried on with fornication or any other sin after coming to and accepting Christ. Which would then make his sinning wilful after being saved.

31"Furthermore it has been said,
"Whoever divorces his wife, let him give
her a certificate of divorce.'
32But I say to you that whoever divorces
his wife for any reason except sexual
immorality causes her to commit
adultery; and whoever marries a woman
who is divorced commits adultery.

There is a translation error and the need to understand the Mosaic Law regarding adultery and divorce. This teaching may help.
https://www.livinggodministries.net...and_remarriage_10_matthew_5_discrepencies.mp3

 

[Isilwen]

There is a translation error and the need to understand the Mosaic Law regarding adultery and divorce. This teaching may help.
https://www.livinggodministries.net...and_remarriage_10_matthew_5_discrepencies.mp3

I have to wait to hear the teaching as I am at work, but is this in reference to "putting away" rather than "divorce?"

 

[Rachel Rachel]

So, regarding money and debts, God would want you to live a miserable life till your debt is paid,
but regarding the wedding promise, God does not want you to suffer, but life a full and marry life with anybody you will meet?

Why do you think that marriage is, in God's eyes, so easily dismissed?

Did you read the scripture I provided in my post?

 

[solid_core]

Did you read the scripture I provided in my post?

I did. Its a parable about forgiving between people.

Its unrelated to divorce/remarriage.

 

[Rachel Rachel]

I did. Its a parable about forgiving between people.

Its unrelated to divorce/remarriage.

Your post was unrelated to marriage:

"Just a practical question.
If you borrow a million dollars and you do not want to pay it back.
If you repent of your past life and become a new person in Jesus, does God want you to forget your past promises and debts or does He want you to live in a different way and care about what is right and wrong? For example to pay your debts even if it means you must live a poor life till your death?"

 

[solid_core]

Your post was unrelated to marriage:

"Just a practical question.
If you borrow a million dollars and you do not want to pay it back.
If you repent of your past life and become a new person in Jesus, does God want you to forget your past promises and debts or does He want you to live in a different way and care about what is right and wrong? For example to pay your debts even if it means you must live a poor life till your death?"

But related to your post that when you repent, you can start like if past did not happen.