Misreading the intent.... Jesus spoke of one's personal enemies that we face in life. Not about criminality nor nations set on destroying yours. And, he spoke about not hating. Doing what is needed to protect your home and family does not require hatred.
"Again, if the trumpet does not sound a clear call,
who will get ready for battle?" 1 Corinthians 14:8
Why was Paul using that military metaphor as a positive example?
"Or what king, going to make war against another king, does not sit down
first and consider whether he is able with ten thousand to meet him who
comes against him with twenty thousand?" Luke 14:31
Why was Jesus using that as a positive way to see things, and not condemn it?
Sorry... not everyone has what it takes to fight in battle. The Bible makes room for them.
"The officers will continue to address the army and say, ‘Is there any man who
is afraid or cowardly? Let him leave and return home, so that his brothers’
hearts won’t melt like his own.’ " Deuteronomy 20:8
We should not give excuses to those who are willing to lay down their lives for their brothers in the defense of their nation. As seen in that passage... cowardice is like a communicable disease - one coward encourages cowardice among others. Not that your son was a coward. He was not afraid to say who he was.
God's Word will not change to accommodate what makes us feel uncomfortable with ourselves.
"Then he called the crowd to him along with his disciples and said:
“Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and
take up their cross and follow me." Mark 8:34
Deny your own feelings and accept the needed death to your old self if need be. Its required if you are truly going to follow The Word of God.
You want to follow "The Word of God?"
The Word that was made flesh and lived amongst us.
Trouble we all must face.. Parts of the Word will offend and demand of the believer things that he by his natural nature will find unsettling... unless he walks in the Spirit and finds himself becoming transformed *by grace* into the new person God wants him to be. The new man in Christ that does not have to succumb to the same weaknesses that his natural inclinations lead him into.
"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power (grace) is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9
In weakness! We all have them. That is why God places us in situations where it demands an end to our old way of life and thinking. Most will not be willing to find it. Instead, they choose the "broad and wide way" and make excuses.
Its not cut and dry either... For it requires growing in knowledge and gaining insight before one truly discovers the life awaiting to be discovered in Christ.
"And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge
and depth of insight." Philippians 1:9
There will be no excuses when we stand before the Lord for the evaluation.