Fat girls

[OntheHorizon]

miss-a

thanks for your comments.

 

[OntheHorizon]

woohoo the Turkish Getup was my lover today!!! She's a cruel mistress she is but I love her.

 

[seeingeyes]

woohoo the Turkish Getup was my lover today!!! She's a cruel mistress she is but I love her.

Doing the turkish get up with a fat girl would be way more impressive:
Turkish Getup - YouTube

Just sayin'.

 

[OntheHorizon]

my brain is all over the screen now..

 

[OntheHorizon]

no way I could do it with 100 ibs

 

[seeingeyes]

no way I could do it with 100 ibs

So you see how a fat girl would impress your meathead buddies at the gym? lol

 

[OntheHorizon]

those are PEOPLE!!! PEOPLE!!! ..... not meatheads, you're so selfish and stuckup!!!

snark snark

 

[OntheHorizon]

if I have to date a fat girl who likes cupcakes for breakfast you have to date a meathead who spends an hour a day shaving and an hour posing and an hour tanning and wears a thong around the house and wants to pump you up.

 

[OntheHorizon]

jk

 

[EstherStar]

one thing i have noticed though the people that tend to be the most vocal and insulting about weight are invariably no oil paintings themselves. Its really ironic.

 

[MercyandFaith]

In essence, you're right. BUT if we look a little deeper, past the question, and to the reasons behind the question, it's likely that it isn't a question about their weight at all. They're looking for affirmation of their value as a human being. I know that that isn't typically how guys think, guys are usually "say what you mean" But from the female perspective, it's just a little insight, take it or leave it

Thanks! That's good advice.


I have a question though: Why exactly would a fat woman find any meaningful affirmation in being told something that she knows isn't true? If a 350-pound woman were to ask people, "Do you think I'm fat," and were told "no," would she really believe it?


Unless they want to be told, "Inner beauty and personality is what counts," but I don't think that's what they're really asking about?

 

[OntheHorizon]

I agree that she isn't so much asking to be made aware of her body, she's asking how someone feels about her. That being said I think that her self value is inseperably bound to her looks and her ability to be found physically attractive.

 

[Inkachu]

Thanks! That's good advice.


I have a question though: Why exactly would a fat woman find any meaningful affirmation in being told something that she knows isn't true? If a 350-pound woman were to ask people, "Do you think I'm fat," and were told "no," would she really believe it?


Unless they want to be told, "Inner beauty and personality is what counts," but I don't think that's what they're really asking about?

It's probably because - for women - appearance (aka weight) and value/worth are inextricably linked in our current culture. If a woman isn't beautiful, she's worthless. If she isn't thin (or at the very least "average" size), she's worthless. She knows she's overweight. She's hoping that, somehow, some way, she's still of value and worth in spite of it. Asking "do you think I look fat" isn't asking "do you not see that I'm obviously fat", it's asking "please say something kind to me, because my self-worth is fragile".

I'm a plus size girl who would never ask anyone if I look chubby, because I already know I do, I have eyes, I can see myself in the mirror lol. So I don't think this way, really, but I can understand where they're coming from. I will sometimes ask my husband if I look beautiful or pretty (I never say "fat" or "thin" because I already know the answer) just because I love knowing that my husband finds me beautiful. If I already know I look hideous (if I'm sick or tired or whatever), I don't ask that question, because the answer is already obvious to me. But because I know my husband loves me more than anything and finds me insanely beautiful and sexy, I'm secure in that, and I don't feel the need to have it affirmed ten times a day.

So it's all about self-worth and security. Asking for affirmation all the time is a sign that someone is desperately seeking acceptance, safety, and love.

 

[Inkachu]

I agree that she isn't so much asking to be made aware of her body, she's asking how someone feels about her. That being said I think that her self value is inseperably bound to her looks and her ability to be found physically attractive.

This is pretty much true of all women. And most men.

 

[OntheHorizon]

I don't know that that's true, while I think we desire to look good it doesn't appear to be incredibly important to everyone.

 

[BFine]

"So it's all about self-worth and security. Asking for affirmation all the time is a sign that someone is desperately seeking acceptance, safety, and love."


*Then why do my "friends" who upon hearing how much I care
and value them...not only when they hint around for it or just come out right
and say it...their responses: "You really don't mean that, you're only saying
that to be nice."

Then I get into reminding them how I've shown them care, friendship, gave
them a shoulder to lean on etc.
Nine times out of ten, the friend will say: "Oh, I forgot."

Whether the friend(s) are overweight or not the above scenario crops up
way too much for me...I guess this is why I have very few women for
friends...

 

[seeingeyes]

those are PEOPLE!!! PEOPLE!!! ..... not meatheads, you're so selfish and stuckup!!!

snark snark

They are meatheads, and they are lovely.

 

[OntheHorizon]

The natural thing to do when we hear something we don't believe is to deny it... this is happening when a person who doesn't believe they deserve acceptance denies that you actually accept them.

Anothers persons love can only be found trivial if you can't love yourself ya know?

 

[seeingeyes]

if I have to date a fat girl who likes cupcakes for breakfast you have to date a meathead who spends an hour a day shaving and an hour posing and an hour tanning and wears a thong around the house and wants to pump you up.

Yeah, I could never be with a man who is prettier than I am.

 

[OntheHorizon]

They are meatheads, and they are lovely.

/flex