Not trying to be controversial here but...

[ido]

plus, based on an epiphony I had at church today.

with each generation "getting worse" (meaning, my parents had to walk uphill in the snow blah blah blah...

if we lower our standards of acceptance, we can expect our kids to take it one step further.

We shouldn't make the right descisions for just ourselves, but also for who's coming next.

 

[TwistTim]

Ya know.... everyone seems to be saying that to me... My heart just doesn't wanna believe it.

He is one of those guys I can see myself marrying... it's hard for me to just let that walk away. And I don't wanna disappoint him either. Girls have treated him like crap. It think he is waiting for someone to prove to him we aren't all the same... and I wanna do that. That's why I choose to stay.

I'm single and I don't do drugs or anything harmful... so is Spicy.... so are many other guys out there.... you just have to look for them and you can find them.......

let me ask you this.... is it more important that you be with a guy or that you find someone who loves you and you will love deeply? it seems like you just wanna be with him, to be with someone..... well what if you are with a guy like that when Mr. Right does come along, how would he feel.... I know you talk with one particular CF'er a lot.... ask yourself how these real life guys stack up against him.... and what matters more by comparison.... that you get a guy that does bad things or one that treats you like a Princess without even dating you?

 

[Im_A]

plus, based on an epiphony I had at church today.

with each generation "getting worse" (meaning, my parents had to walk uphill in the snow blah blah blah...

if we lower our standards of acceptance, we can expect our kids to take it one step further.

We shouldn't make the right descisions for just ourselves, but also for who's coming next.

i agree whole heartidly. it's bad enough that beautiful chidren get created in a world that has a lot of bad in it, but i would like to think that we could/should create children at least in a good enviroment, and a good situation to where they can learn how to deal with the bad of the world healthier ya know?

ya know, an odd example, is with my smoking cigarettes. sure its legal, and it's more accepted by society than lets say illegal drugs (even tho that acceptance is going down quite fast) but to be honest with you bro.? i don't want children till i can quit smoking cigarettes at least.

i grew up around cigarettes. grant it tho, i will say, this for me brings up good childhood memories. watching dad bowl in a bowling alley that when you walk into, you walk out smelling like you just smoked a carton of cigarettes, ha. it always brings me smiles remembering those times. i spent half of my childhood in a bowling alley. i love bowling alleys.

but point being, i don't my kids to walk home from school and smell cigarettes in their home. i don't want their health to be at risk. i don't want my child to see daddy smoking and think, oh its ok to smoke when its not, its stupid to inhale cigarettes. its one addiction that i wish i had it in me more and more to quit, but its the most difficult. i've quit pot basically because the epiphany moment was when i got stoned out of my mind one night in college, woke up feeling like life is grand, and great, and then by evening, i was debating suicide. so with that, and a specific song from a heavy metal band, soulfly, i found a way to get off of pot, as well as a great friend of mine, who let me move in with him. it took a DUI to learn mature drinking and controlled drinking, which now is the norm for me. but cigarettes? i just don't know what to do.

i'm a guy who hates the idea of being on pills to fix something like this. i'm a guy and i have too much manly pride. thinking i can do it myself. when honestly i can't. but, i have some time left before i have to pay more extra a week for my insurance. it sucks ha, but i agree with it. smokers increase the risk for health insurance a lot more than people who love fast food or drink. so i may have to swallow my manly pride and get on pills to quit because, i'm getting so tired of it. and i'm at an age now that, children may be coming up. grant, please pray not any time soon tho

 

[gottabemore2life]

I'm single and I don't do drugs or anything harmful... so is Spicy.... so are many other guys out there.... you just have to look for them and you can find them.......

let me ask you this.... is it more important that you be with a guy or that you find someone who loves you and you will love deeply? it seems like you just wanna be with him, to be with someone..... well what if you are with a guy like that when Mr. Right does come along, how would he feel.... I know you talk with one particular CF'er a lot.... ask yourself how these real life guys stack up against him.... and what matters more by comparison.... that you get a guy that does bad things or one that treats you like a Princess without even dating you?

I am single right now... and I am not settling... part of the reason why I am still single.

I am still very up in the air about this guy... but despite some of his problems, he is an amazing person. Intelligent, spiritual, successful, compassionate, honest... I usually only post when he has screwed up though, so I think people here have a skewed impression of him. . Not that I am making excuses for him...

As for comparing people to my CF guy, It's really upsetting.... I have had guys on here tell me what a great girl I am and that I will find someone who will treat me like I "deserve" to be treated, but all the guys I have met just don't stack up. Something is missing....

 

[GoodNewsJim]

But last night, was kinda the straw that broke my back. The guy I have been seeing recently was supposed to come hang out with me since I haven't seen him in awhile. But he got too high to drive... I am just wondering how weed could possibly be that great that he would break plans with me. I am very upset at the moment and just want to understand what is so good about it that it causes people to forget about everything else except getting that high.

Guess what? Pot doesn't make you feel so good that it trumps love. Pot is maybe 1/1000th as good as sex. Pot costs you a lot of money, and you're typically supporting a drug ring in the process

If the stuff was legalized like beer, I'd probably be smoking it if I grew it myself and didn't have to pay money. But I'd never smoke weed when I had a chance to date an attractive girl. Anyone who'd rather smoke weed than hang out with an attractive girl doesn't have their priorities straight.

 

[Im_A]

He is one of those guys I can see myself marrying... it's hard for me to just let that walk away. And I don't wanna disappoint him either. Girls have treated him like crap. It think he is waiting for someone to prove to him we aren't all the same... and I wanna do that. That's why I choose to stay.

here's one thing i didn't add to just offer for food for thought with this. it's not your job to prove that your not the other girls. its a bad thing for a guy to do to a woman, regardless of him being on pot or whatever, or being clean and sober. i've made that mistake to women before. demanding they prove that they are not like the bad women i've had. and it was a major fault on my part. the only proving i think should be is, that i'm worth spending the life with and visa versa, not proving that you are not the other women.

so with your care and love for him, i think its easy to fall into what spicy was talking about, lowering your standard of acceptance, because you love him and want him and see things in him. you don't wanna do that. it'd be different if the guy just didn't like the same music as you did, or liked different sports than you did. this drug issue is pretty big and nothing to lower standards for.

 

[Spicy McHaggis]

i agree whole heartidly. it's bad enough that beautiful chidren get created in a world that has a lot of bad in it, but i would like to think that we could/should create children at least in a good enviroment, and a good situation to where they can learn how to deal with the bad of the world healthier ya know?

ya know, an odd example, is with my smoking cigarettes. sure its legal, and it's more accepted by society than lets say illegal drugs (even tho that acceptance is going down quite fast) but to be honest with you bro.? i don't want children till i can quit smoking cigarettes at least.

i grew up around cigarettes. grant it tho, i will say, this for me brings up good childhood memories. watching dad bowl in a bowling alley that when you walk into, you walk out smelling like you just smoked a carton of cigarettes, ha. it always brings me smiles remembering those times. i spent half of my childhood in a bowling alley. i love bowling alleys.

but point being, i don't my kids to walk home from school and smell cigarettes in their home. i don't want their health to be at risk. i don't want my child to see daddy smoking and think, oh its ok to smoke when its not, its stupid to inhale cigarettes. its one addiction that i wish i had it in me more and more to quit, but its the most difficult. i've quit pot basically because the epiphany moment was when i got stoned out of my mind one night in college, woke up feeling like life is grand, and great, and then by evening, i was debating suicide. so with that, and a specific song from a heavy metal band, soulfly, i found a way to get off of pot, as well as a great friend of mine, who let me move in with him. it took a DUI to learn mature drinking and controlled drinking, which now is the norm for me. but cigarettes? i just don't know what to do.

i'm a guy who hates the idea of being on pills to fix something like this. i'm a guy and i have too much manly pride. thinking i can do it myself. when honestly i can't. but, i have some time left before i have to pay more extra a week for my insurance. it sucks ha, but i agree with it. smokers increase the risk for health insurance a lot more than people who love fast food or drink. so i may have to swallow my manly pride and get on pills to quit because, i'm getting so tired of it. and i'm at an age now that, children may be coming up. grant, please pray not any time soon tho

Yeah I think we either accelerate or decellerate the trends.

Right now I think society is trending downward. I don't think we're going to reverse it this decade, but we can slow it enough witha few generations that eventually our great great great great grandkids will be able to pull up before we crash.


airplanes. WEEEEEEEEE!!!!

 

[Im_A]

I am single right now... and I am not settling... part of the reason why I am still single.

I am still very up in the air about this guy... but despite some of his problems, he is an amazing person. Intelligent, spiritual, successful, compassionate, honest... I usually only post when he has screwed up though, so I think people here have a skewed impression of him. . Not that I am making excuses for him...

As for comparing people to my CF guy, It's really upsetting.... I have had guys on here tell me what a great girl I am and that I will find someone who will treat me like I "deserve" to be treated, but all the guys I have met just don't stack up. Something is missing....

just remember tho, just because you've met pricks, druggies, and guys that don't want to treat you the way to be treated, that doesn't give you a reason to be up in the air about this guy that does drugs. hey may treat you good, but that's being conflicted by the fact that he's doing something that is pretty big and coud open your life up to a very bad world.

you have the power to say no, i don't want this, stop or stop talking to me. i don't deserve this, so if you can't stop it, then leave me alone. i imagine you've given that to other guys in various forms, why stop with someone who does drugs?

 

[Im_A]

Yeah I think we either accelerate or decellerate the trends.

Right now I think society is trending downward. I don't think we're going to reverse it this decade, but we can slow it enough witha few generations that eventually our great great great great grandkids will be able to pull up before we crash.


airplanes. WEEEEEEEEE!!!!

i agree. but if we teach them how to use a parachute, they should be ok. they can jump out and find a better plane to fly on and at least be able to scream at the top of their lungs as they fall to a better airport

 

[gottabemore2life]

just remember tho, just because you've met pricks, druggies, and guys that don't want to treat you the way to be treated, that doesn't give you a reason to be up in the air about this guy that does drugs. hey may treat you good, but that's being conflicted by the fact that he's doing something that is pretty big and coud open your life up to a very bad world.

you have the power to say no, i don't want this, stop or stop talking to me. i don't deserve this, so if you can't stop it, then leave me alone. i imagine you've given that to other guys in various forms, why stop with someone who does drugs?

Cuz I have let myself get too close. I care too much... it's a fault of mine.

 

[Spicy McHaggis]

We could also start discussing:

Drugs = shortcut
dating below your standards = also shortcut

when people who have what it takes to get a natural high aren't the ones who can or should settle, so we'll never be satisfied with less.

 

[Spicy McHaggis]

schmoe...

(sniff)



...you had me at parachute...



(sniffle)

 

[TwistTim]

I am single right now... and I am not settling... part of the reason why I am still single.

I am still very up in the air about this guy... but despite some of his problems, he is an amazing person. Intelligent, spiritual, successful, compassionate, honest... I usually only post when he has screwed up though, so I think people here have a skewed impression of him. . Not that I am making excuses for him...

As for comparing people to my CF guy, It's really upsetting.... I have had guys on here tell me what a great girl I am and that I will find someone who will treat me like I "deserve" to be treated, but all the guys I have met just don't stack up. Something is missing....

Christ maybe? are you attracting Christians in real life? reason I ask is you are plainly a beautiful young lady, and many worldly men would be drawn to that alone....... I'm not saying all the guys you draw are pretenders, but some of them could be.... especially when they could get a hot blonde cheerleader.....

either make a pledge to not date anyone who isn't an active church-going Christian before they meet you.... or find a way to screen who you date more carefully than basic attractions.....

I am tempering my words, and editing myself here.... I do not wish to offend you... as it is not your fault you have attracted this kind of guy in real life.... men are dogs and will go after whatever bone they think is there to chew......

 

[gottabemore2life]

We could also start discussing:

Drugs = shortcut
dating below your standards = also shortcut

when people who have what it takes to get a natural high aren't the ones who can or should settle, so we'll never be satisfied with less.

I never in my life thought I would consider dating a pothead....

My life is soooo messed up right now!

 

[gottabemore2life]

Christ maybe? are you attracted Christians in real life? reason I ask is you are plainly a beautiful young lady, and many worldly men would be drawn to that alone....... I'm not saying all the guys you draw are pretenders, but some of them could be.... especially when they could get a hot blonde cheerleader.....

either make a pledge to not date anyone who isn't an active church-going Christian before they meet you.... or find a way to screen who you date more carefully than basic attractions.....

I am tempering my words, and editing myself here.... I do not wish to offend you... as it is not your fault you have attracted this kind of guy in real life.... men are dogs and will go after whatever bone they think is there to chew......

That is very sound advice. And I know I should take it.

 

[Spicy McHaggis]

Christ maybe? are you attracted Christians in real life? reason I ask is you are plainly a beautiful young lady, and many worldly men would be drawn to that alone....... I'm not saying all the guys you draw are pretenders, but some of them could be.... especially when they could get a hot blonde cheerleader.....

either make a pledge to not date anyone who isn't an active church-going Christian before they meet you.... or find a way to screen who you date more carefully than basic attractions.....

I am tempering my words, and editing myself here.... I do not wish to offend you... as it is not your fault you have attracted this kind of guy in real life.... men are dogs and will go after whatever bone they think is there to chew......

it also might help to find an older (than you) woman at church, the kind who lives the life YOU want to live, and run these guys by her (like a double date maybe) and see what red flags she sees. Like, if you were in Florida, double with Val, then LISTEN TO HER.

Tim, umm, that was directed at the ladies, using your post as my springboard.

I really look up to my friends, and I'll do this. After enough of it, I stopped dating low class bus stop skanks, and in turn started dating a higher class of bus stop harlot.

 

[GuacaMolly]

Spicy, you've made some really good points here.

Weed can send you to jail, wreck your car, make you lose jobs, friends, credibility and not to mention lots of dolares.

Gottabe, I'm with everyone else who says run and here's why. If he's toking up, he obviously doesn't see that the possible negatives outweigh the benefits. He thinks it's okay. Until he doesn't, he will keep doing it and if that's something that you're not okay with, don't compromise on it.

 

[Im_A]

I never in my life thought I would consider dating a pothead....

My life is soooo messed up right now!

don't think of it like that.

think of it as, your at a point in your life that your growing. remember what Paul said. we go from needing milk to solid food right?

it doesn't mean your messed up or that your life is messed up, it just may mean, you need to think about you more...you and your future and what that will be, because today kind of dictates it to some degree right?

and hey on a sidenote, don't feel too bad. i've dated two stoners in my life. my wakeup call with dating stoners was when the last stoner i dated smoked pot around her 2 year old daughter. let's just say this, that was anger that i've never dealt with before. i ended up writing this huge long letter because no one was in the apartment at the time, and hopped on a bus, that took me about 40 blocks away, where i saw christmas lights on houses that reminded me of home because i was living in Portland, Oregon at the time. walked back where i was staying, and we had a big argument about it, and 3 days later? i'm a greyhound bus back to Ohio. don't feel too bad.

 

[GuacaMolly]

Ooh, I forgot to add that weed can cost you felony charges. My friend can tell you how easy it is to get a job with that on your record. Not to mention that in OK it's considered a CDS, so it looks like meth or cocaine to a future employer.

 

[RosaVernal]

I smoke weed. Now, whether or not you approve of this, I'm open to answer any questions on it, at all.

Eventually, in the spirit of “sod this, I need a break” I meandered off to my room at four twenty exactly, packed it in, and lit up. Getting baked is always an interesting experience – or at least, it should be. There's the initial period of fire and air, filling your lungs to the brim with smoke and holding it until your body is pounding for air, followed by a gradual exhalation of white clouds around you, the familiar plant scent lingering in the air around you. Rinse, repeat, and wait. I'd been trying out some salvia recently, and my body had gotten used to the sage – given that it took about two minutes to kick in before you were laying on your back, staring off into the sky with disembodied voices swirling around your head - I was almost surprised at how long it took for Mary to get busy.

Instead of a sudden sledgehammer to the frontal lobes, it was a gradual relaxation of the body's tense muscles, a steady blurring between rational thought and emotive-guided mental processes, and then before you know it - you're stoned. About sixty percent of all stoners go through the stage of muttering "dude I'm so baked” for the first few minutes until your attention span drifts off towards the nearest cool thing.