Wow, this board is depressing

[Infinite777]

This isn't meant to be offensive, but it's just sad seeing how some people are coping with being single. Just from breifly reading through some of the threads, it seems like some of your lives are just so dull without someone to share it with, and that makes me sad. I struggled with depression for about a year in regards to being single, but then I realized that I wasn't even trying to do anything about it. I just sat back and someone thought a perfect girl would magically find her way to me. I am only 17, so I have plenty of time left, but for those of you who are single, can you honestly say that you try to get out there and socialize? Heck, even church is a great place to start looking, because you know they will (or at least are more likely) to have the one quality that is most important. Anyway, I don't know everyone's story, and I know there's that theory that some people are just "gifted at being single" (which I say bahumbug too... God places desires in your heart for a reason, not to torture you), but maybe people aren't trying hard enough or are afraid to get out there on that "hip crazy scene" all the youngsters seem to be clamoring about today Anyway, I hope you all end up finding that special person, because I can't think of a more beautiful way to glorify God on Earth than through a relationship with another that includes God in everything.

 

[Taylor43]

Yes it can be depressing but there are uplifting threads. I hope you can see positive threads

 

[Weasel7711]

Its quite depressing at times yes. I don't post too much here anymore.

 

[Luther073082]

This isn't meant to be offensive, but it's just sad seeing how some people are coping with being single. Just from breifly reading through some of the threads, it seems like some of your lives are just so dull without someone to share it with, and that makes me sad. I struggled with depression for about a year in regards to being single, but then I realized that I wasn't even trying to do anything about it. I just sat back and someone thought a perfect girl would magically find her way to me. I am only 17, so I have plenty of time left, but for those of you who are single, can you honestly say that you try to get out there and socialize? Heck, even church is a great place to start looking, because you know they will (or at least are more likely) to have the one quality that is most important. Anyway, I don't know everyone's story, and I know there's that theory that some people are just "gifted at being single" (which I say bahumbug too... God places desires in your heart for a reason, not to torture you), but maybe people aren't trying hard enough or are afraid to get out there on that "hip crazy scene" all the youngsters seem to be clamoring about today Anyway, I hope you all end up finding that special person, because I can't think of a more beautiful way to glorify God on Earth than through a relationship with another that includes God in everything.

Well there are a lot of reasons most of us are single. Some you could say are afraid to get out there. Others are because they where left by their ex with kids. Many others because they can't find that someone.

Being a single adult is nothing compaired to being single as a teenager. There just is no comparison between having friends who have girlfriends or boyfriends and having all your friends have husbands or wives.

For me personally the only single women in my church are over 40 so the church isn't working for me.

For me for the most part this is better as a support board then anything else. The adult world revolves around the couple and as being young enough to remember what its like to be a teenager I can tell you its absolutly nothing like being a single teenager. I can not even compaire the two for an instant.

So yes theoretically you are correct that we should just place our faith in God. But just remember its a lot easier to say that from where you are sitting then from where a lot of us are sitting. And even with me its a lot easier for me to say that at age 24 then for me to say that to someone who is in their 40's or close to it.

So you really have to understand why people are depressed about this kind of thing. And its also been pointed out correctly that there are uplifting threads in here and discussion threads in here. But this is also a place for hurts from people who have been on the wrong end of love or no end of love whichever the case may be.

Its quite depressing at times yes. I don't post too much here anymore.

You are also not single anymore either.

 

[Weasel7711]

True, but usually single means "unmarried"

 

[Luther073082]

True, but usually single means "unmarried"

Only when you are filing a form and it asks for your marital status. If someone asks you if you are single then they are asking if you have any kind of SO not if you are unmarried.

Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against you being here. But you can't really define yourself as single to anyone but the government.

 

[mina]

eh, some people struggle with it, some don't. The important thing is not to judge each other no matter your station in life or part on the journey. I think most people who complain about singleness (or anything really) just want to feel like someone is listening. The marriage board can be depressing too sometimes. so can the women's board. It doesn't just begin and end with singles. If you notice negativity , post something encouraging or positive.

 

[ImperialPhantom]

Yes, it is depressing. Ironically, I found my girlfriend at these forums. The first things to draw us together? The View, and making light of/complaining about the singles board.

 

[plum]

well now we know what the peanut gallery thinks. phew. my mind's at rest.

 

[dluvs2trvl]

I am only 17

Uhmmm...like you said - this isn't meant to be offensive but you are only 17...

 

[Beautiful Fireball]

Yes, it is depressing. Ironically, I found my girlfriend at these forums. The first things to draw us together? The View, and making light of/complaining about the singles board.

Sounds like a cool chick

 

[Highland Watchman]

Yeah, it has its depressing moments. It's kind of cyclical, actually. I've been part of Singles since I joined CF, and there are times when every thread seems to be "I need someone!!! Why do I feel so alone?!?!?!" or the "Why do men/women have to be so cruel?" But then it ebbs into other seasons, where it becomes more encouraging and the social/fun threads become the big hit... and then it changes again, and there is a bunch of controversy that bubbles up to the surface.

As for me, I am one of those guys who doesn't mind being single. For right now, anyway. I find it's a lot easier, given the circumstances of where I am in life. There are other reasons, of course, but that is the big one that I can think of.

 

[Infinite777]

I didn't mean in any way shape or form that I have it worse than people that are later along in life... in fact, I know it much be much much harder to cope with at that age. And I'm not judging those who are upset about it, because like I said, I was depressed for over a year about it. And honestly? If I wasn't a Christian I would either take up drugs or suicide if I was still single in my midlife. It's not like I think of it as some casual desire... the thing I want most on this Earth (apart from Jesus) is a meaninful relationship like that. Thankfully though I've been finding happiness in Christ alone during this single period of my life, and I hope others here can do the same.

 

[srobinson]

your 17 come back after college when all your friends are married and you have moved and live alone then lets see what your tune is

 

[Macrina]

Only when you are filing a form and it asks for your marital status. If someone asks you if you are single then they are asking if you have any kind of SO not if you are unmarried.

Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against you being here. But you can't really define yourself as single to anyone but the government.

I've gotta disagree with you there. The word is often used in the way you describe, but it still broadly refers to one who is unmarried. Dating and relationships are part of the single lifestyle for many people.

 

[Niels]

Sometimes it's helpful to have a place to vent and share how we feel. I doubt most singles who vent about their singleness here do so in other parts of CF.

Anyway, what's depressing to one person may be comforting to another... as they realize that they aren't alone in their suffering. IMO, complaining about the fact that other people feel bad about being single is pointless. We're entitled to feel that way, and to commiserate with others who can relate.



Should we all be good little fakers and pretend that we all LOVE to be starved for human affection and companionship? Happy Happy Joy Joy!

 

[Timyone]

This isn't meant to be offensive, but it's just sad seeing how some people are coping with being single. Just from breifly reading through some of the threads, it seems like some of your lives are just so dull without someone to share it with, and that makes me sad. I struggled with depression for about a year in regards to being single, but then I realized that I wasn't even trying to do anything about it. I just sat back and someone thought a perfect girl would magically find her way to me. I am only 17, so I have plenty of time left, but for those of you who are single, can you honestly say that you try to get out there and socialize? Heck, even church is a great place to start looking, because you know they will (or at least are more likely) to have the one quality that is most important. Anyway, I don't know everyone's story, and I know there's that theory that some people are just "gifted at being single" (which I say bahumbug too... God places desires in your heart for a reason, not to torture you), but maybe people aren't trying hard enough or are afraid to get out there on that "hip crazy scene" all the youngsters seem to be clamoring about today Anyway, I hope you all end up finding that special person, because I can't think of a more beautiful way to glorify God on Earth than through a relationship with another that includes God in everything.

ummm thanx for the advice..
how long have u been single?

 

[Infinite777]

People, I really wasn't trying to cut you down for being sad. I know how tough it can get, as I was depressed for a full year over this. And I mean really depressed. It was horrible. I didn't mean for it to come across as "Wow, you guys are so pathetic! Stop whining and do something about it!" You guys aren't pathetic, and my heart really does go out to you, and I pray that everyone here finds someone. I know it's a place to vent, I understand that venting helps people to cope. When I asked if people were single because they were waiting for someone to come to them as opposed to actively searching, that wasn't meant to be insensitive either. It was an honest question with honest advice. I really didn't mean for this thread to be taken in a way that hurt anyone, and if it came across that way I really am sorry

 

[A Taffer]

Philippians 4:8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

 

[Luther073082]

I've gotta disagree with you there. The word is often used in the way you describe, but it still broadly refers to one who is unmarried. Dating and relationships are part of the single lifestyle for many people.

I'm sorry I still define a single person as a person with no SO. If I want to know if you are married then I will say "Are you married?" but if I use the term single I'm asking if you have an SO.