You seem to be very wise.
So basically do you have to abandon being a Christian just because youwant to abandon the doctrines of a denomination or congregation??
If I just didn't like the doctrines of a particular denomination or congregation, I would have done what most religious people do, and found one I
did think was preaching the truth.
It was the fact that "truth" has been reduced to doctrines that I am opposed to. Doctrines are "official" truths. Things that have been declared true by respected councils of respected humans. But in reality, there can be no such thing as "official" truth. What is true exists. What is not true, doesn't. The Holocaust either happened or it didn't, regardless of what a President says, and Jesus was God/human or whatever he was, regardless of what a council says.
And yet, religions are based on these councils declaring the official truth that Jesus was 100% human and 100% divine, or that Jesus's divinity overtook his humanity at the end of his life, or that it didn't, or whatever. To belong to the religion, you must declare your belief in
the doctrine. Not in seeking the truth, but in accepting the declaration of a council of humans who could never really
know what they are declaring anyway.
And why do these doctrines, these religions, exist? Is it to encourage the spread of Christ's message? Of course not. Christ's message was to the little people. There is nothing in there about how to establish a Christian country or what a Christian political party should look like. The message of Christ assumes that the follower of Christ is a politically weak person, possibly homeless and with very few funds, whose main goal in life is to serve.
So, why do these religions, based on doctrines, exist? Constantine declared them true in order to unite Rome. The Vikings accepted them out of the belief that a person who can overcome death must be the biggest, baddest warlord around and that allying themselves with him would ensure better plunder and power. Modern people use religious beliefs, based on human doctrines, in order to add the legitimacy of "because God said so" to political beliefs.
My beef is not with any particular doctrine or denomination, it is with reducing truth to doctrine, and with using personal moral teachings as the basis of social clubs called religious denominations.
edit: ahh...a good wrap-up. I do not want my pursuit of truth to be confined by a forced declaration of "official" truth. I needed to abandon the concept of doctrines because it was inhibiting, not encouraging, my pursuit of truth.