when it is hardest to be alone

[JAM2b]

I hope you are doing well

 

[blackribbon]

I had the surgery on Friday and other than normal post-op pain, am feeling better than I have in a very long time. My 19 year old daughter insisted on staying with me the whole time..even sitting through the surgery alone in the waiting room and spent the night with me. Tons of the nurses on my floor actualyl came in to visit me. Many that I didn't think even liked me. Sometimes God uses the tough time to show us that we really aren't as alone as we feel...and we are in God's hands.

 

[SouthernChristian]

This time of year is the hardest. Being single around the holidays isn't fun.

 

[JAM2b]

This is a very difficult time of year for many people for all kinds of reasons. It is important to build as large of a social network as possible. Make compromises in your personal life so that you can get some enjoyment out of the holidays, like movies with friends, activities with church and in the community.

I have spent the last four Christmases alone because my boys go to visit their dad in another state. I have found other people to be with and things to do to keep myself busy. There was a couple of years, where I was able to work some extra hours because others wanted time off. The key to keeping your sanity when you are alone for holidays is to stay busy and also rest and self-care when you are not busy.

 

[blackribbon]

How do you suggest that you build up a social circle if you have little to none? The older I get, the harder I find this to do. During the holidays especially, people have so many obligations elsewhere.

 

[Sir Robbins]

How do you suggest that you build up a social circle if you have little to none? The older I get, the harder I find this to do. During the holidays especially, people have so many obligations elsewhere.

I hear you and I'm 28. My social life is my job.... I don't do anything with people outside work aside from poker and model railroading and that's with people twice my age (my grandparents do both) and I don't affiliate with the people I work with outside work due to their habits. Lots of drug users, players and alcoholics. It sucks at times to do everything alone but other times, it's great! I just spent several days in Palm Beach setting up Tony Robbins show. Every night going to my hotel alone and trying to go to sleep was hard. It's an eerie feeling to be surrounded by people but feel so lonely

 

[Servant68]

I have spent the last four Christmases alone because my boys go to visit their dad in another state. I have found other people to be with and things to do to keep myself busy.

When I got divorced, I moved back to this area since this is where my family lives. The first three holiday seasons were not bad. Even though my parents go down to Arizona for the holidays, my brother lives within 15 miles, and both my kids lived in the Seattle area.

Year before last, my daughter had moved to Japan, my son went to be with his mother in Missouri, my parents were in Arizona, and my brother met a girl and spent the holidays with her family and I was not invited.

It was pretty depressing and soul crushing.

Last year I was dating someone over the holidays and it helped, but no substitute for family.

This year will be the total opposite; my parents aren't going to AZ until after Christmas, my daughter will be here, and my son is staying with me for Christmas.

 

[blackribbon]

If you are truly alone for the holiday, go "adopt" a grandparent (or parent) at a nursing home that has no one either. You don't have to be completely alone. Start building a relationship at Thanksgiving...bring in some board games or card games or sugar free sweets and just ask them about their life experiences.

 

[Servant68]

My church was asking for Meals on Wheels driver volunteers last week so I've been meaning to sign up. Just waiting to see when I go to days at work so I know what my schedule will be.

God has blessed me with a 4x4 pickup, a love of driving in the snow, and an affinity and respect for senior citizens. So, seems like I should try it out.

 

[blackribbon]

It is a good organization...but they usually get more volunteers than they have customers on the holidays. The real need is the rest of the year. They deliver meals daily. That doesn't mean don't volunteer, just don't be disappointed if they say they don't need any more volunteers.