What's on your mind?

[DragonFox91]

Never a dull moment.

We could create 'The Dull Thread' where only dull things are discussed? Or no one replies b/c it's so dull? Then we can have a dull moment, or several.

 

[TheLastGeek]

I am not surprised at your answer. It is how I thought you'd respond if you did. A 'you have something really, really, really, really wrong with you, & dude, you need to see a therapist to fix you' kind of response. I hope you don't mean it like that when you give routine responses like that. You probably don't mean it like that. I believe since you are a Christian you don't mean it like that. But it sure comes off that way. A 'I don't understand your issue, you're too messed up for me or anyone else to get, & we're not even gonna try, & a therapist can fix you.' It comes across as not really caring, & not really caring to understand & learn.

I understand harsh truth is needed. Sometimes people do need to get help. But I believe encouragement should go with harsh truth. I found a ton of optimism & hope & 'where are all these good thoughts coming from I couldn't possibly have imagined' in my post' but there was not a sign of you read that in your post. Not even a 'I think a therapist would be good for you because blah blah blah. It'd be so amazing for you if they could figure something out for you.' Or any kind of questions or nothing.

I'm sorry I'm pushing back in your response. Let me explain: When I was growing up, when I was little, the next door neighbors told my parents I was weird, they needed to get me to a shrink. My parents were appalled at the rudeness. Maybe if the neighbors hadn't been so rude, & approached my parents with kindness, a wanting to see me do well, & not a 'he needs fixing & only a shrink can do that' kind of attitude, maybe they would've got me help early on & things would've been different & better. But my neighbors didn't. They did it wrong. I'm sorry to say this, but without the encouragement in your post, I can see some of the same wrong attitude, the same wrong approach. There's no tenderness. There's no empathy. Tell me I need to go to a shrink all you want, but without hope & optimism, it's only inviting push-back.

No, I have no intention of canceling. I am very interested in meeting him. I want to hear what he has to say. I want to listen. I want him to listen to me. I want him to understand where I'm coming from. I don't want him to make jokes about it, & for him to think it's insignificant or it's no big deal (& maybe it is no big deal, but again, without showing an understanding, it only provokes pushback b/c it comes across as rude). But maybe it'll be very good. Maybe it'll be very encouraging. I do need to understand not everything can get addressed first appointment, it may take some time to feel like I'm benefiting. But I really do want to go.

I do appreciate the response.

This is great advice. Thank you. I told a coworker not that long ago who was moving on & kind of nervous about it, that you wouldn't have applied & they wouldn't have hired you, & you wouldn't be quitting & moving on, if you didn't think you could grow & benefit from it. I need that same attitude I tried to give her.
Office manager -no, not really my thing. I went to school for accounting. I want something more related to that. My current job gets into it a little bit, but I want more of it.
Certifications or additional training - absolutely, great idea. My buddy is always finding ways to get certified from courses! He says I should to & you say it too!

Since I've shown you empathy, compassion, and concern in many other posts, the fact that you default to the hurt, resentful feelings of how other people have made you feel, that just cements what I said. The ability to separate feelings of past experiences and your own insecurities, from reality and what you know is true of other people (that I am not a harsh, uncaring person), is part of what you can learn through good counseling and therapy. Just to be clear, I was not being harsh or unfeeling to you at all. I'm not that kind of person. Your posts consistently exhibit someone who experiences frequent highs and lows of mood, conflicted thought patterns, and indecisiveness. You sometimes wonder aloud in your posts if this is normal. It is not normal. Therefore, I really, sincerely hope that you get help. Not that I view you as some broken, crazy, weird person. I don't. I don't hold such stigmas of mental illness, having suffered from them myself, and having lived and worked and been close to countless people with the same struggles. I view these people as human beings like any other, who are struggling and fighting a battle, and who need help to learn the tools and skills to get through them.

Accounting is a very lucrative profession to get into! I hate working with numbers, but I admire those who are skilled at it, lol.

 

[TheLastGeek]

If I may offer some input here, I think she was concerned about what you shared and she was trying to urge you to keep your appointment. I don't think she was trying to imply that you are a lost cause or can only be fixed by a shrink. I've read several of her other posts, and she has a very positive view of therapy/counselling. I think she's reminding you and urging you, because she thinks it will really help you.

Yes, exactly.

 

[DragonFox91]

Since I've shown you empathy, compassion, and concern in many other posts, the fact that you default to the hurt, resentful feelings of how other people have made you feel, that just cements what I said. The ability to separate feelings of past experiences and your own insecurities, from reality and what you know is true of other people (that I am not a harsh, uncaring person), is part of what you can learn through good counseling and therapy. Just to be clear, I was not being harsh or unfeeling to you at all. I'm not that kind of person. Your posts consistently exhibit someone who experiences frequent highs and lows of mood, conflicted thought patterns, and indecisiveness. You sometimes wonder aloud in your posts if this is normal. It is not normal. Therefore, I really, sincerely hope that you get help. Not that I view you as some broken, crazy, weird person. I don't. I don't hold such stigmas of mental illness, having suffered from them myself, and having lived and worked and been close to countless people with the same struggles. I view these people as human beings like any other, who are struggling and fighting a battle, and who need help to learn the tools and skills to get through them.

ok fine. I have nothing to say. You shared what you think & that is what you think.

 

[.Mikha'el.]

Bored me has been trying to memorize the order of the Bible books just for the heck of it. It's really not as easy as it would seem.

 

[Niels]

The cat adoption saga continues...

Today, I visited the same shelter that I adopted my old cat from back in 2005. He passed away a few months ago and I miss him greatly. Anyway, there were a few cats on their website that looked interesting and I figured it was worth the trip. One cat in particular caught my eye and I hoped to get there before somebody else adopted him.

It was an emotional experience. I hadn't been to that place in 18 years but it still looked the same. At least from the outside.

As I was orienting myself and looking for some hand sanitizer, a cat ran out into the hallway.

"Oh, no!"
"He's getting away!"
"He escaped!"
"That door dasher!"

There was commotion from one of the rooms as a big fluffy cream-colored cat ran by. It was the one I had hoped to meet! Not knowing much about this cat, I quickly scooped him up in my arms and carried him back to the room. He didn't mind being held. That was a big concern of mine, as the last cat I wanted to adopt scratched my face. Holding this other one today helped rebuild my confidence. Both in myself and in cats in general. My old cat enjoyed being held and I miss that so much it is one of my criteria for choosing a cat.

Anyway, I placed him on the floor and gave him a few pets before looking around and waiting to se what he'd do. Maybe he was just scared from being at the shelter, but his behavior wasn't great. When people petted him he growled and hissed. He didn't bite or scratch,, but he did seem kind of angry. Some of the people visiting the shelter were young children. Although they were able to pet him, he would snarl when touched. That's pretty much a deal-breaker for me.

He let me pet him, but seemed rather indifferent to the attention. No sniffing my hand, no following me around, no eye contact. Just a few sniffs of my left shoe before he walked away.

This cat was basically the opposite of the last one I thought I'd adopt. Whereas the other one seemed friendly but hated to be held, this one didn't mind being held but wasn't especially friendly. Needless to say, I returned home with an empty cat carrier.


Maybe I'm just spoiled, or my old cat was a freak, but when I met him at the shelter he followed me around and had such a sweet temperament. His personality remained friendly and gentle for the rest of his life. Apparently, the eye contact thing is somewhat unusual as cats tend to interpret eye contact as a threat, but my old cat loved it. Sometimes, all it took was a glance for him to come over to be petted. And I could hold him. He never bit or intentionally scratched me and was very patient. He would also greet me at the door (even if he had plenty of food in the bowl) and follow me around the house. My little shadow. Hopefully, I can be patient enough to find another cat that while being its own animal will be just as lovable.

 

[GodDoesListen55]

We could create 'The Dull Thread' where only dull things are discussed? Or no one replies b/c it's so dull? Then we can have a dull moment, or several.

Wow, that sounds so dull, lol.

 

[DragonFox91]

Yesterday I went to an event I go to, & one of the attendees was a man "pretending" they're a woman. I've never really had to interact with this kind of person, but I got my first go yesterday for about 15-20 minutes.
I could immediately tell something was wrong. Not like 'oh he's pretending he's a woman', but 'this person is sick', & not like 'sick' as in twisted, but 'sick' as in need of a doctor.
He's not a woman stuck in a man's body like he probably believes -> he's a child stuck in a man's body. He never grew up. He acts like a child, like a little kid, not like a woman, certainly not a grown woman.
I won't deny sometimes these things you are born with, but it really does make me question, was there someone to teach him masculinity? Did he have some kind of trauma? Was it 'passed on' from his parents / parent? I don't know, I don't know, but I don't think it's healthy.
It's like an otherwise perfectly functioning adult still not potty-trained & needing diapers. That's how I compare it. That's what I thought of. That's what I saw.

Also: I shall not forget to not pass judgement on straight people too. Including myself. My goodness, we have our own problems w/ sin being straight.

 

[peaceful-forest]

I won't deny sometimes these things you are born with, but it really does make me question, was there someone to teach him masculinity? Did he have some kind of trauma? Was it 'passed on' from his parents / parent? I don't know, I don't know, but I don't think it's healthy.
It's like an otherwise perfectly functioning adult still not potty-trained & needing diapers. That's how I compare it. That's what I thought of. That's what I saw.

One of the reasons why a person enters the LGBTQ+ lifestyle is because they were sexually abused growing up.

 

[MehGuy]

Would be nice if everything just worked out in life.

 

[DragonFox91]

Would be nice if everything just worked out in life.

That'd be no fun.

 

[GodDoesListen55]

Good people get treated like the help while the bad people get treated like kings and queens, which literally makes no sense to me; just saying.

 

[DragonFox91]

IDK what 'like the help' means, but bad people need more special treatment b/c their souls crave it. Good people don't.

 

[DragonFox91]

I was watching the touchy Frodo & Sam scenes – my goodness. How we want all male / male relationships to be like that. Self-sacrifice & love. True brotherhood. Not eros. This is different. This is different in a way most people can’t understand.

 

[DragonFox91]

God is so good. It’s such an honor what he’s given me. Even tho I want to date & fall in love & get married. It’s still good anyways.

 

[DragonFox91]

I’m trying to find list of fun ‘icebreaker type questions similar to that one, but they’re all the boring / dreadful ones.

Does anyone want to help me hunt for a fun list?

 

[DragonFox91]

Bored me has been trying to memorize the order of the Bible books just for the heck of it. It's really not as easy as it would seem.

I know Genesis thru Chronciles.
Matthew thru Corinthians

& one or 2 in a row here & there.

Here’s what helps: Most of it is organized by category. So if you break it into smaller chunks by the categories it makes it easier. That’s why the rest of the NT is proving hard for me, b/c it’s all just letters outside Revelation is which I suppose is technically a letter too.

Torah / Pentateuch (not sure what right word is) -> History – Wisdom – Prophets – Gospels – Acts (technically it’s own thing) – Letters – Revelation

Wild guess: I think after Chronicles, it’s Ezra -> Nehemiah – Esther?

Yes! I was right

Some of the prophets I haven’t read in their entirety so that’s why I struggle with their order -> hard to know just reading what this is prophecy about w/ out a study guide.
How’s it going? Let us know!

 

[MehGuy]

That'd be no fun.

If everything worked out well in life, that'd also include fun in life working out too.

Whatever is good enough to live like in heaven should be the same regardless of where you are.

 

[DragonFox91]

My spirit is crying. Only way I can describe it. Where you don't feel sad & aren't but a part of you does.

 

[RileyG]

Would be nice if everything just worked out in life.

Absolutely