What's on your mind?

[bèlla]

So I'm not sure if I'm reading this right, but you're saying that possibly your gender helped nudge him in a better direction to be a better person?

I have his ear. That’s a privilege. It affords opportunities to share light and a timely word. Wise women do that. They don’t watch people implode and remain silent to avoid ruffling feathers. Their well-being is foremost.

Returning to something maybe he had forgotten?

Yes. The absence of positive influences reinforces wrong behavior.

 

[RileyG]

Just thinking about life and where it is headed now that I’m almost in my late 20s

 

[Tone]

We just had a convo. about this today at work.

The bartender said something about her recent ex not listening...or hearing...her.

( I just had deja vu... literally)


I forget the difference.


*

I have his ear.

 

[bèlla]

We just had a convo. about this today at work.

The bartender said something about her recent ex not listening...or hearing...her.

( I just had deja vu... literally)


I forget the difference.

Hindsight is difficult. The man listens more than he did when I was around. Such is life.

 

[Tone]

Hindsight is difficult. The man listens more than he did when I was around. Such is life.

You've never been married right?

Do you ever feel like if you did...the world would end?

...ha ha...

 

[bèlla]

You've never been married right?

Do you ever feel like if you did...the world would end?

...ha ha...

No. I've had a lot of proposals and discussions along those lines. Even in my wayward days.

I don't feel my world would end. My circumstances give me liberties I wouldn't have otherwise. I look to the Lord for guidance. Finding a Christian suitor is a process. I've contemplated things from different angles. It took awhile for me to own what I needed in a companion completely.

I'm not afraid to marry. But I won't forge a bad alliance. I don't have the ache or yearning that would compel me to compromise.

 

[Tone]

No. I've had a lot of proposals and discussions along those lines. Even in my wayward days.

I don't feel my world would end. My circumstances give me liberties I wouldn't have otherwise. I look to the Lord for guidance. Finding a Christian suitor is a process. I've contemplated things from different angles. It took awhile for me to own what I needed in a companion completely.

I'm not afraid to marry. But I won't forge a bad alliance. I don't have the ache or yearning that would compel me to compromise.

 

[bèlla]

@Tone

I think the right fit challenges you. But you're not out of your depth.

 

[Tone]

@Tone

I think the right fit challenges you. But you're not out of your depth.

Yeah, ever the balance. The boss and i were talking about this today.

I was like I'd like a woman who's laid back, and not all uptight all the time.

Then he said something about not having any free time, because a woman is demanding of your time.

He's like they want you there all the time, but then they want you to get out and make money too.

Then we got to talking about a woman that doesn't want her man there...probably cheating, ha ha.

So I was like, yeah I gotta find that balance.

 

[HisGraceAbounds]

I don't attend worship services on weekends.

I haven't stepped foot inside a church for years.

As odd as it may seem, church is a place I do not feel welcomed. I get looks and stares from folks most places I go, but it's magnified at church. I don't feel any sense of belonging when present with other people. In my head I hear the song "one of these things is not like the others; one of these things just isn't the same..."

 

[bèlla]

I was like I'd like a woman who's laid back, and not all uptight all the time.

I value that quality in a man. I need someone who knows how to shift gears when necessary. He isn't serious all time or so relaxed he never gets serious. A happy medium is ideal.

Then he said something about not having any free time, because a woman is demanding of your time. He's like they want you there all the time, but then they want you to get out and make money too.

That isn't true. All women aren't demanding or desiring your presence around the clock. We have lives, dreams, and responsibilities. The key is finding the person whose reality complements your own. The best way to do that is through prayer and discussion. Have them share their ideal.

You need to know how they envision the day, evenings, and weekends too. Listen closely to see if its rigid or flexible. Everyone has setbacks days and unexpected delays. Is she the sort who wants dinner at 5 no matter what or willing to adjust?

Do the same for children if you desire them. Is her picture comparable to your own or wholly different? The more common denominators you share the better you'll get along. You'll have fewer reasons to argue or disagree.

You don't need to be identical. But there should be complements in values, outlook, goals, and problem-solving if you're lucky. Faith is a given so I don't include it. But if you follow a tradition or have a specific approach and want the same; find someone who echoes your sentiments. Don't assume they'll change.

Then we got to talking about a woman that doesn't want her man there...probably cheating, ha ha.

I'm not a clingy woman. I don't mind periods of separation. Everyone needs time alone to think, engage with friends, and be with Lord. I don't monopolize his attention. And I don't allow the same.

 

[DragonFox91]

Grr, site wasn't working all morning.

Yesterday was not good. I felt like crying.

I don't attend worship services on weekends.

I haven't stepped foot inside a church for years.

As odd as it may seem, church is a place I do not feel welcomed. I get looks and stares from folks most places I go, but it's magnified at church. I don't feel any sense of belonging when present with other people. In my head I hear the song "one of these things in not like the others; one of these things just isn't the same..."

It can be tough. There's always so many 'perfect' people who have their life together.

 

[GospelS]

Yesterday was not good. I felt like crying.

It's okay my friend. Cry it all out until He does something. It may not be a happy thing but it's a healthy sign. But don't ever forget to put on your armor of God. Don't let the devil use your vulnerability and weakness to trip you into something sinful. You are doing much better than you think. It's a phase. Most go through it at some point. You will come out rejoicing one day, hopefully soon. He is at work. I know it's hard but you can gain great wisdom from it and life-giving lessons if you use this chance to be productive in your faith.

 

[SarahsKnight]

It's okay my friend. Cry it all out until He does something. It may not be a happy thing but it's a healthy sign.

You are a good lady to say this to help others, GospelS.*salutes*

 

[bèlla]

No one has a perfect life and the grass isn't as green as you imagine. Everyone has problems. The absence of struggles in one area doesn't mean life is trouble free. They have different issues.

 

[GospelS]

You are a good lady to say this to help others, GospelS.*salutes*

Thank you, my friend. I'm only imitating Him. It comes from seeing through the eyes of our heavenly Father. It brings me to tears. I wish I could somehow wipe everyone's tears. There is an overflowing abundance in me. It just flows out. I beheld His glory.

 

[SarahsKnight]

Thank you, my friend. I'm only imitating Him. It comes from seeing through the eyes of our heavenly Father. It brings me to tears. I wish I could somehow wipe everyone's tears. There is an overflowing abundance in me. It just flows out. I beheld His glory.

And such is a beautiful sentiment and desire that you have.

 

[bèlla]

I was like I'd like a woman who's laid back, and not all uptight all the time.

Don't forget politics and the prickle. Gotta be calm. People are wound!

 

[shineyourlight]

Grr, site wasn't working all morning.

Yesterday was not good. I felt like crying.

Well, I hope you gave yourself grace to cry. If not, next time.

Because there is One who collects your tears.

"You keep track of all my sorrows.
You have collected all my tears in your bottle.
You have recorded each one in your book." Psalm 56:8

 

[shineyourlight]

I'm meeting up with someone tomorrow after work. We have a mutual friend and she was all, "You gotta meet my friend, who's also into fitness and health like you." Don't worry, not a date. This "someone" is a female and I think our mutual friend just wanted us to meet. So, we are doing a run tomorrow