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What Would You Do ? II

What would you do ? (ANSWER ANONYMOUSLY)

  • REFER HIM BACK TO HIS DAD.

  • REFER HIM TO COUNSELOR/MINISTER.

  • INFORM/ENCOURAGE HIM BEHIND HIS DADS BACK.

  • WARN HIM ABOUT STRANGERS ONLINE.

  • REFER HIM TO A CHRISTIAN WEBSITE.

  • DIAL 9-11


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BAFRIEND

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assume that you are on a forum and read a new post that says:



i am 14yo male and so unhappy. I was living with my mom but she sent me to live with my dad. My dad is gay and lives with a man he married. Everyone at school knows and picks on me, even my friends make fun of me. If this is not bad nuff, I want to go to church and I am Baptist but my dad would get really mad if I went because he says they are all hypocrates and gay bashers and do not believe in his gay marriage. But I love Jesus. Even if he lets me go I am afraid of what other Christians might think about my dad. What should I do, this hurts.
What would you do ?
 

UberLutheran

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He's unhappy living with his dad and apparently doesn't have that great a relationship with his mother.

I'd refer him to a counselor or minister.

It might be an option for him to live with a relative and/or go into temporary foster care until the situation can be sorted out.
 
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Ave Maria

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Okay, but please explain because in "What Would You Do ?" Involving the boy with Christian parents you said:



Why a difference here ?
I don't know. I guess I just simply changed my mind. That said, either one would be an option for me.
 
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BAFRIEND

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I was watching this mother of three kids who had lost her husband on a TV program.

She was dating another man and the couple was getting serious and she loved him but broke it off because she felt that her three children were just not ready for another man to step into daddy's shoes.

I commended that lady placing her childrens own wants/needs before her own.

Why can't this gay dad leave his partner to better raise his child at least until he is old enough to be on his own ? Why should the kid have to go into foster care ? Who comes first, gay partner or son ?
 
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TheFathersDaughter

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I was watching this mother of three kids who had lost her husband on a TV program.

She was dating another man and the couple was getting serious and she loved him but broke it off because she felt that her three children were just not ready for another man to step into daddy's shoes.

I commended that lady placing her childrens own wants/needs before her own.

Why can't this gay dad leave his partner to better raise his child at least until he is old enough to be on his own ? Why should the kid have to go into foster care ? Who comes first, gay partner or son ?

Maybe his son is older, or maybe he believes his son is ready. Honestly, women are FAR more sensitive to their children then men are, almost all the time (almost). So a man may choose his wife over his children, wishing for intimacy. But a women will almost always put her children first. So this is a gender thing. Trying to pin it on "well gays don't care about their kids" is unethical.
 
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Bianca87

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I was watching this mother of three kids who had lost her husband on a TV program.

She was dating another man and the couple was getting serious and she loved him but broke it off because she felt that her three children were just not ready for another man to step into daddy's shoes.

I commended that lady placing her childrens own wants/needs before her own.

Why can't this gay dad leave his partner to better raise his child at least until he is old enough to be on his own ? Why should the kid have to go into foster care ? Who comes first, gay partner or son ?
???
this is another issue. it has nothing to do with homosexuality.
 
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BAFRIEND

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???
this is another issue. it has nothing to do with homosexuality.
My dad is gay and lives with a man he married. Everyone at school knows and picks on me, even my friends make fun of me. ... Even if he lets me go I am afraid of what other Christians might think about my dad.

This kid is alienated in big part because of his father's social arrangement with a man.

How does that have nothing to do with homosexuality in the example I provided in the OP ?

In the OP I think it implys clearly that parenting is going to be at issue.

Why can't this gay dad leave his partner to better raise his child at least until he is old enough to be on his own ? Why should the kid have to go into foster care ? Who comes first, gay partner or son ?
 
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Bianca87

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This kid is alienated in big part because of his father's social arrangement with a man.

How does that have nothing to do with homosexuality in the example I provided in the OP ?

In the OP I think it implys clearly that parenting is going to be at issue.

homosexuality has nothing to do with the decision of giving up love for the benefict of your kids or not and that at one point became the issue of the debate:
Why can't this gay dad leave his partner to better raise his child at least until he is old enough to be on his own ? Why should the kid have to go into foster care ? Who comes first, gay partner or son ?
you don't need the word gay there, this is about parenting in general, his partner could as well have been a woman and the kid could have had problems with that as well, i know i did.
 
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BAFRIEND

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homosexuality has nothing to do with the decision of giving up love for the benefict of your kids or not and that at one point became the issue of the debate:
you don't need the word gay there, this is about parenting in general, his partner could as well have been a woman and the kid could have had problems with that as well, i know i did.
I think I do need the word :

GAY


Because it supports my view (not perceived PC nor your view) that this is not a family we are talking about. This is not the boy's mother nor step parent. this is another man that his father has sex with and the boy has to pay for it socially.
 
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Bianca87

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Because it supports my view (not perceived PC nor your view) that this is not a family we are talking about. This is not the boy's mother nor step parent. this is another man that his father has sex with and the boy has to pay for it socially.
so if the kid is discriminated the fault is not of the people who discriminate, but the victim's of the discrimination?
this is like asking your parents to hide thier religion if they are muslims, 4 ex, if you pay it socially beacuse of the discrimination due to fear.
the guy would actually be the boy step parent there, someone his father has sex with, but also loves and shares a life with, you always seem to forget that about gay couples...
my advice would be: move to a decent neighborhood /town/city
 
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BAFRIEND

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the guy would actually be the boy step parent there

Since marriage is a sacrament, a step-parent would be a legitimate partner in a valid marriage (ie binding by God and not mans law). Can you support where anywhere in the Bible it states that a homosexual is a step parent or where any homosexuals are validly married in a same sex marriage ? Can you even find any example in scripture where it refers to marriage as between same sex partners. Jesus and the OT always referred to as a husband and a wife, time and again.
 
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Bianca87

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[Since marriage is a sacrament, a step-parent would be a legitimate partner in a valid marriage (ie binding by God and not mans law). Can you support where anywhere in the Bible it states that a homosexual is a step parent or where any homosexuals are validly married in a same sex marriage ? Can you even find any example in scripture where it refers to marriage as between same sex partners. Jesus and the OT always referred to as a husband and a wife, time and again.
using the word actually i meant by facts he would be a step-parent in everyday life even if he's not formally.
 
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