Were we wrong?

[The Princess Bride]

So last night my sister got a text from my step daughter saying she has her new phone and needed #s. A little while later, she texts again saying there was "an emergency and I need my Dad's number!" so my sister sent it. We were unaware of what had happened until noon today because we had never heard anything. So my husband immediately calls her. We spend several hrs worth of calling/txting her and her mom. They live an hour away so we didnt want to just show up on their door for nothing. Finally my husband sends his ex a txt after she FINALLY replied with "everything is fine" when all he had txt or said was to have their daughter call him. His ex has a habit of lying and the fact her never asked if something was "fine" or not, seemed suspiciously odd. So he sent her another txt saying she had 15 mins to have the daughter call him or he was going to ask the sheriff for a welfare check on the daughter.

 

[The Princess Bride]

A few minutes later the daughter calls ME (mind you I've let my husband handle things) crying saying it was all a misunderstanding and her phone was taken away. I could hear the mom and step dad in the background screaming at her. Then the mom snatches the phone, gets smart with me and says she "see us in court". Thank god I recorded her whole rant on my phone. My husband and I were scared something had happend to one of the kids. If someone had simply had the decency to pick up the phone - this could all have been avoided. My husband did later talk to his daughter and of course by then she was parroting her mom... There has been a lot of stuff going on lately and we were concerned. If they had nothing to hide - why be so offened over their own lack of consideration for a worried father?

 

[Mairie]

I'm so sorry, that must have been a scary situation for you. I think everything you and your husband did was perfectly reasonable and justified. I just said a prayer for God's wisdom and guidance for you and your husband as you figure out what's going on in the life of your precious step daughter.

 

[LilLamb219]

How old is the child? Does she usually cause drama for the attention? Is there a neighbor that you and your husband know that could check up on her instead of threats with the authorities?

 

[The Princess Bride]

How old is the child? Does she usually cause drama for the attention? Is there a neighbor that you and your husband know that could check up on her instead of threats with the authorities?

She is 13 and usually mature for her age. We both felt that she knew well enough the appropriate way to use "emergency" which is why we did not doubt her. We do not know anyone near them - in fact we have not been "allowed" to see the home they've been living in for the last 2 yrs . We did have the address though.

 

[paul1149]

The daughter may be being pressured to keep quiet about conflict. I would (probably through the father) make sure she understands that there is always an ear for her problems and a shoulder to lean on. She may be mature for her age, but it's a terrible pressure to have to expose your own mother, whom you live with, to possible legal or even criminal consequences. Make sure she understands that her safety and wellbeing are your (pl) greatest concerns.

She may have called you rather than her dad because she felt it might have been harder to fool her dad. Try to work closely with hubby on this. Brainstorm together.