Virgin marriage.

[Owen GB5]

I would like to know if virgins really do have a more intimate relationship because they are joined to only one other person. Obviously their relationship is more exclusive, but do they have a spiritual union because they are 'one flesh' (in a way that they can only be with one other person)?

 

[Greg J.]

Their relationship is not "more exclusive," unless you are referring to the possibility that the virgin has only ever loved his/her spouse. I do not think that it would result in a more or less intimate relationship. It would affect the character of their relationship and what is in each of their hearts, such as potentially seeming or feeling deeper unity.

The "one flesh" union is available to any married couple if their hearts are both pointed at the Lord.

(I've never been married.)

 

[Owen GB5]

Their relationship is not "more exclusive," unless you are referring to the possibility that the virgin has only ever loved his/her spouse. I do not think that it would result in a more or less intimate relationship. It would affect the character of their relationship and what is in each of their hearts, such as potentially seeming or feeling deeper unity.

The "one flesh" union is available to any married couple if their hearts are both pointed at the Lord.

(I've never been married.)

I am referring to when both are virgins and have had no sexual experience with anyone else; their sexual feelings are only for each other.
We all rememember our first time and memories like this are part of the most intimate moments of the marriage union.
A couple who have come together as virgins can look into each others eyes at these times and feel a perfect 'oneness' that they share with no-one else.

 

[lunastella]

There's no way of knowing.

 

[Radrook]

The quality of the marriage isn't dependent on whether both were virgins or not. It depends on the way they treat one another after the vows have been taken.

Hebrews 13:4 ►
New International Version
Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.

In short, the spiritual virginity of the Christian couple is the far more valuable in this case.

Revelation 14:4 ►
New Living Translation
They have kept themselves as pure as virgins, following the Lamb wherever he goes. They have been purchased from among the people on the earth as a special offering to God and to the Lamb.

 

[Owen GB5]

If the quality of marriage isn't dependent on whether both were virgins or not does it really matter if we have previous sexual experience? I know we can be forgiven but would not the memories of the previous person affect our married love-making?

 

[writewords]

I would like to know if virgins really do have a more intimate relationship because they are joined to only one other person. Obviously their relationship is more exclusive, but do they have a spiritual union because they are 'one flesh' (in a way that they can only be with one other person)?

There is no real way to test this

 

[noam burde]

at least for me it was good to have some experience before being married.
to know have much worse a relationship can be than the one I'm having. makes me appreciate my relationship with my wife.
also just to have some experience helps.

 

[RedPonyDriver]

Neither one of us were virgins when we got married. Our past relationships influenced our relationship. We both had a chance to realize what we did and didn't want in a relationship, including in a physical way.

 

[writewords]

Neither one of us were virgins when we got married. Our past relationships influenced our relationship. We both had a chance to realize what we did and didn't want in a relationship, including in a physical way.

Neither one of us were virgins when we got married. Our past relationships influenced our relationship. We both had a chance to realize what we did and didn't want in a relationship, including in a physical way.

Neither of these responses cannot be reasons to participate in immorality to have "some experience" before marrying. Yes, I'm sure it did impact your marriage, I'm happy that it was a positive impact, but that is not always, and probably rarely the case. Your posts implications are hazardous to the unlearned and those looking for an excuse to be immoral. Please rethink your statementsstatements. I am not trying to judge you but instruct you.

 

[RedPonyDriver]

Neither of these responses cannot be reasons to participate in immorality to have "some experience" before marrying. Yes, I'm sure it did impact your marriage, I'm happy that it was a positive impact, but that is not always, and probably rarely the case. Your posts implications are hazardous to the unlearned and those looking for an excuse to be immoral. Please rethink your statementsstatements. I am not trying to judge you but instruct you.

I've done the research. Cohabiting couples do not divorce at any different rate than non-cohabiting couples. Atheist couples have a lower divorce rate than Christian couples...that alone should tell you something.

 

[writewords]

I've done the research. Cohabiting couples do not divorce at any different rate than non-cohabiting couples. Atheist couples have a lower divorce rate than Christian couples...that alone should tell you something.

I am aware of the high divorce rates. It takes no genius to know they are high across the board. It's an epidemic. It does not matter who's is higher, it does not mitigate getting "experience" with, or living with someone before marriage, period.

 

[RedPonyDriver]

I am aware of the high divorce rates. It takes no genius to know they are high across the board. It's an epidemic. It does not matter who's is higher, it does not mitigate getting "experience" with, or living with someone before marriage, period.

When cohabitating leads to lower divorce rates, when atheists have far lower divorce rates than Christians...I would have to say that someone has the idea of marriage messed up (hint...it ain't the atheists or cohabitators)

 

[writewords]

When cohabitating leads to lower divorce rates, when atheists have far lower divorce rates than Christians...I would have to say that someone has the idea of marriage messed up (hint...it ain't the atheists or cohabitators)

r
Still irrelevant to the point I'm making.

 

[dayhiker]

Personally, I've not found that being a virgin helped or hindered my marriage.
I'm single in my older years now and when I start a relationship I give no consideration to them being virgins and actually prefer that they have been around the block and used all those experiences to know themselves and what they want. Usually in that process they have also learned to communicate and that is what really brings in the intimacy. If they are ashamed to talked about their past relationships then I move on knowing intimacy wouldn't develop.

 

[RedPonyDriver]

r
Still irrelevant to the point I'm making.

No, totally relevant...people with experience prior to marriage generally have a better marriage, less issues with intimacy. Atheists who engage in "immorality" have longer, more solid marriages. Therefore, your pie in the sky virginal wedding night dream is just that, a dream. When the data show that atheists (who presumably have no hang ups regarding sexual behavior prior to marriage) have longer, stronger marriages, then there's something wrong (hint, it's not with the atheists).

 

[writewords]

No, totally relevant...people with experience prior to marriage generally have a better marriage, less issues with intimacy. Atheists who engage in "immorality" have longer, more solid marriages. Therefore, your pie in the sky virginal wedding night dream is just that, a dream. When the data show that atheists (who presumably have no hang ups regarding sexual behavior prior to marriage) have longer, stronger marriages, then there's something wrong (hint, it's not with the atheists).

Irrelevant. Your position still won't garrauntee absence of a divorce, therefore not a solid argument. A lot of Christians who were virgins prior to marrying have long happy marriages. Your position still does not mitigate the immorality.

Gonna stop checking this conversation because you'ryou're not gonna listen anyway.0

 

[Sammy-San]

The quality of the marriage isn't dependent on whether both were virgins or not. It depends on the way they treat one another after the vows have been taken.

Hebrews 13:4 ►
New International Version
Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.

In short, the spiritual virginity of the Christian couple is the far more valuable in this case.

Revelation 14:4 ►
New Living Translation
They have kept themselves as pure as virgins, following the Lamb wherever he goes. They have been purchased from among the people on the earth as a special offering to God and to the Lamb.

Is it true a marriage has to have vows to be one?

 

[Radrook]

Is it true a marriage has to have vows to be one?

Genesis doesn't show them vowing anything to one another. The only words are those spoken by Adam in appreciation and wonder at having been provided by a helper.

Genesis 2:23 ►
New International Version
The man said, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman,' for she was taken out of man."

BTW
Having taken a vow didn't prevent my parents for going for each other's throats for twenty years before their divorce. Ruined my nerves in the process. They were always bickering, or starting to bicker or just finishing bickering.

 

[Sammy-San]

Genesis doesn't show them vowing anything to one another. The only words are those spoken by Adam in appreciation and wonder at having been provided by a helper.



BTW
Having taken a vow didn't prevent my parents for going for each other's throats for twenty years before their divorce. Ruined my nerves in the process.

I mean Jews don't consider the contract getting married-the wedding is.