Hey, Truely Unsure
Yes, I know it sounds a bit strange, but I've had those experiences, which changed me. As a child, I was attacked by demonic forces (my best way of explaining it, I suppose). The thing was that I had nobody to talk to about it. I didn't even have the words to try and explain it. I just stopped wanting to live anymore. This thing would come after me every single night, and terrify me. Then, one day, my 1st grade teacher told me about Jesus. My first thought was to ask Him - he wouldn't need fancy words, but help me. That same night, the same scary stuff happened, and I just asked Him to help. What happened after that will stay with me all the days of my life. I felt waves of energy rippling through my body, and an overflowing with joy came over me. The next moment, my soul left my body, and I was standing in an empty dark void. In front of me, I saw a figure standing, that had a brilliant light shine out of Him. The light wasn't natural, because one could look straight into it without getting one's eyes hurt. I felt this powerful passionate love and peace. As I stood there, speechless, I felt all my burdens disappear. Back then, I had no idea what was happening. Well, a long time afterwards, I realised what must have happened. And, honestly, those attacks have disappeared right then, 32 years ago.
Since then, I've stared hearing the voice of God, speaking to me. It is that which encouraged me through life, and kept me going - as I had a very lonely childhood.
Anyhow, I know this sounds like something out of a science fiction novel. I do usually hesitate to share this, as there have been fellow Christians who rebuked and rejected me because of this. They even told me I have devils inside me, or that I am under their control. It hurts. Sheesh.
Anyhow, I suppose the point I'd like to make is this. It sucks to be alone when life is getting too much to handle on your own. Sometimes, we just need a friend to talk to. Not someone who preaches at you. I know how *irritating* it can be when someone just insists on preaching to you, instead of just listening, and offering unconditional love. I'd like to reaffirm my promise, that I won't try to convert you. I'd just like to offer some ears that will listen to you, and offer encouragement - as that is something we all do need. Not preaching. When people hurt, they need love, not preaching. It's the love that heals, not the preaching. By now, Christians should know this...
Regards
Andre