Unaffectionate Wife

[Tropical Wilds]

I think the people’s issue with the OP was he wrote an insanely demeaning letter to his wife where he said she does the work of an easily replaceable nanny and maid, then demands answers as to why she’s not more affectionate. In general, women aren’t going to have feelings of warm affection when their husband speaks to them like an angry parent and then says their role could be easily hired out to somebody else without anybody telling a difference. In that case, they are calling him out for a particularly insulting letter, not the whole of people with this issue or you specifically with yours.

I’m going to say though, if you’re at a point where you feel homicidal or suicidal, you absolutely need to get help ASAP. Regardless of any of our views on the topic of lack of affection, the first priority comes in making sure you and your loved ones are safe.

 

[DZoolander]

So when I see people defecating on this guy, my heart breaks, and they are not only insulting him, but me, because I feel exactly where he stated, to the point of wanting to just die and go home to end it all here. It is unbearable even with the help of Christ. Imagine without. This is how husbands snap suddenly and kill their entire families if Christ is NOT in the heart. And society blames the man. Its all about the man. Man up. Suck it up.

Dude, are you saying that you're a biblical verse away from empathizing with those that mass murder their families?

 

[Benjamin Hirt]

i appreciate that. all of it. Nobody is in danger here. DZ - yes - i am very much in empathy with mass murderers, and the way the people treated them. Take Parkland. Everyone had been bullying this odd kid all his life. He had no Christ. What kind of outcome can we expect with a life of hate cast at you, tossed aside by family and friends in time of need, teased, ridiculed by kids and teachers alike. Unless you have lived it, don't judge it. I LIVED IT!

I certainly do not condone the direction and choices they made. Through Christ, I make holy choices, but yes, my words are harsh. That is not going to send me to hell, so stop telling me it is.

Because I feel compassion for the shooters doesn't mean I condone what they did. How does Jesus treat the sinner? Do you think the shooter deserves hell? Who are you to say? Are you God?

Yet you make yourself out to be, by condemning these kids instead of reaching out early and loving them, helping them.

"NOT MY JOB MAN!!!"

Yes, it is. Jesus gave it to you.

Or are you truly that heartless and unchristian?

 

[Benjamin Hirt]

If you feel condemned by my words, that will be the Holy Spirit convicting your heart. Listen to him. 1 John 4-7. (ASV confuses me - try NIV) If they don't listen they are not from God.

 

[DZoolander]

Interesting segue.

Yep, that's me. I've had the perfect life. Never encountered a bully. Being social was always a breeze. In fact, I was the Chad kid that everyone envied. Girls flocked to me by the dozens - every day. I had to beat them off with a stick! Well, the ones I wasn't having sex with. I had to beat THOSE girls off with a stick to make way for the others.

All while simultaneously figuring out a way to humiliate the poor innocent Cruz kids of the world.

That was my life, yep!

On a side note - I'd be willing to guess your position on a number of other political issues as well based upon that little rant...lol How accurate do you think I'd be?

 

[Benjamin Hirt]

I think the people’s issue with the OP was he wrote an insanely demeaning letter to his wife where he said she does the work of an easily replaceable nanny and maid, then demands answers as to why she’s not more affectionate. In general, women aren’t going to have feelings of warm affection when their husband speaks to them like an angry parent and then says their role could be easily hired out to somebody else without anybody telling a difference. In that case, they are calling him out for a particularly insulting letter, not the whole of people with this issue or you specifically with yours.

He was honestly expressing his feelings for the love of Pete! My god, people LISTEN TO WHAT HE IS SAYING, not how he is saying it.

 

[Benjamin Hirt]

Interesting segue.



On a side note - I'd be willing to guess your position on a number of other political issues as well based upon that little rant...lol How accurate do you think I'd be?

Let us have some fun. Try me. I'm game. Give me ten.

 

[DZoolander]

Clearly you're one of the "Walk up not out" guys, lol.

Probably stands to reason that you then are anti gun control legislation and also rant on about the ineffectiveness of gun bans.

Probably then stands to reason that you didn't vote for Hillary...seeing Trump as the lesser of the two evils. But, my hunch would be you would've preferred Cruz...

ummmm...lol

 

[DZoolander]

You have a zealousness in your posts that doesn't usually come from lifelong faithful - so odds are you're either a somewhat recent born again...or else a recovering alcoholic who found God. Those are the two groups I see that will rant on like that.

 

[DZoolander]

How am I doing so far? lol

 

[Tropical Wilds]

Interesting segue.

Yep, that's me. I've had the perfect life. Never encountered a bully. Being social was always a breeze. In fact, I was the Chad kid that everyone envied. Girls flocked to me by the dozens - every day. I had to beat them off with a stick! Well, the ones I wasn't having sex with. I had to beat THOSE girls off with a stick to make way for the others.

All while simultaneously figuring out a way to humiliate the poor innocent Cruz kids of the world.

That was my life, yep!

On a side note - I'd be willing to guess your position on a number of other political issues as well based upon that little rant...lol How accurate do you think I'd be?

Wait, who’s Chad?

 

[Benjamin Hirt]

Here's one.

LGBT, gay weddings, photographers, and bakers.

The LGBT was right to sue, but for the wrong reasons. The Christians were wrong in their stand.

Instead of saying "No" refuse, say "On the condition you realize I am a Christian, and I will share the Gospel of Jesus with everyone I talk to at your event. If you are ok with that, I will do business with you."

I believe that is how Christ would have handled it. Don't turn them away. Make the most of the opportunity. They denied the Gospel to people who needed it most. God took their businesses away.

 

[Tropical Wilds]

He was honestly expressing his feelings for the love of Pete! My god, people LISTEN TO WHAT HE IS SAYING, not how he is saying it.

I did listen to what he was saying. All I’m saying is when you tell a wife her work is no different than a maid or a nanny, then demand to know why she isn’t affectionate... Well, lack of affection begets lack of affection.

 

[DZoolander]

Chad is the term people will use for a vapid good looking guy who's had everything come easy. lol

 

[Benjamin Hirt]

Clearly you're one of the "Walk up not out" guys, lol.

Probably stands to reason that you then are anti gun control legislation and also rant on about the ineffectiveness of gun bans.

Probably then stands to reason that you didn't vote for Hillary...seeing Trump as the lesser of the two evils. But, my hunch would be you would've preferred Cruz...

ummmm...lol

No, I am a walk up, welcome type.

I do not believe in gun control I am a constitutionalist.

Johnson - the most Christian of behavior and platform of Christian inclusiveness, not hate and self righteousness.

 

[DZoolander]

Gotta say I find myself half agreeing with you on those. lol

 

[Benjamin Hirt]

You have a zealousness in your posts that doesn't usually come from lifelong faithful - so odds are you're either a somewhat recent born again...or else a recovering alcoholic who found God. Those are the two groups I see that will rant on like that.

Baptized as a baby and a raised in the church. Read the bible dozens of times since 2003, three times in one year where God directed me to write a manuscript (unpublished) on false teachings in the church. I started Seeking Real Truth Ministries at the time with a vague call the has recently been clarified to use my own heart and the evil within (removing the plank) to point out the evil in Christian hearts (removing the speck).

Subjected to sexual abuse as a child, lived through hell and abuse on every level yet remained faithful to the Lord through it all because of the acute awareness I have of my own vile sin every day. I am filled with more grace than most can imagine, and my grace is costly.

You have no clue what I have sacrificed and am about to sacrifice in my life to serve the Lord.

 

[Benjamin Hirt]

How am I doing so far? lol

I think 0-2

 

[DZoolander]

lol fair enough - usually my chain deductions are more accurate - but clearly sometimes not!

 

[Tropical Wilds]

Chad is the term people will use for a vapid good looking guy who's had everything come easy. lol

Ah. The male Mary Sue, or Rey from Star Wars. Got it. Continue on.