This Is My Fireproof Thread

[Romanseight2005]

Wellllll, it's been a long time, what can I say? I guess I remembered him yelling at her about being disrespectful as being the equivalent to him yelling at her to respect him. But oh well my bad!

I think he punched a wall or something like that too. It was actually pretty scary behavior. I think what he said was that she needed to respect him.

 

[hijklmnop]

Yes, I always want to respect someone throwing a mantrum.

 

[Created2Write]

This made me LOL.

So much anger (others, not you) about the undercurrents and hidden messages some people think is in a movie...a MOVIE!

Just as a comment: the entertainment industry uses movies to give many, many messages through undercurrents. How all the women(not in this movie, but movies in general) have perfectly etched bodies, how sex is just something that you do in the dating relationship(and is always portrayed to be nothing more than lust), how black people are less intelligent and problematic than whites, etc. So, while I understand it is just a movie, I also understand how the undercurrents can be offensive.

 

[Created2Write]

Wellllll, it's been a long time, what can I say? I guess I remembered him yelling at her about being disrespectful as being the equivalent to him yelling at her to respect him. But oh well my bad!

Yelling about respect is not the same as yelling about submission. Both are wrong, I'm not justifying them. And I am more inclined to think that he was trying to control her. IMO, that's the reason people yell...so they can feel/be in control. But I don't see them as being the same thing.

 

[jackpetersen]

Created2Write is correct-

A movie like this is always written to have subtexts.


Ever notice that it is very rare for the Christian character in a secular movie to be anything other than small-minded, bigoted and/or closet homosexual?

Is it "whining" for Christians to point that out? Hollywood seems to think so.

Perpetually portraying a certain class of people in a negative way is very cowardly and passive-aggressive. When someone calls you out on it, all you need to do is ridicule them for being "too sensitive".

 

[jackpetersen]

I think he punched a wall or something like that too. It was actually pretty scary behavior. I think what he said was that she needed to respect him.

I call gratuitous use of the word "scary". If that scares you, you have a very, very safe life.

That said, he lost his cool, and that is not masculine at all.

Then again, maybe God gave men the stronger physique for a reason. Imagine how insufferable a woman like that would be if she knew she could kick his butt?

 

[Created2Write]

He didn't punch a wall. He slammed the cupboard doors together. Not good behavior, to say the least. But not the same as punching a wall.

 

[chaz345]

Um, it's a movie. Maybe the pretend wife apologizes to the pretend husband in the pretend future. I'm fairly amused at the lack of ability to get over the fact that an hour-and-a-bit-long movie does not show everything involved in a broken marriage being healed and reconciled, which typically takes years. "The pretend woman didn't rebuke the pretend wife firmly enough to make it even!" LOL This is getting a little ridiculous. A lot ridiculous.

If it were just one movie it would be one thing. I get that a movie can't show everything. But I dare you to find me a single movie where it's even or slanted the other way. None exist. That's the problem. In and of itself, looking at this one movie you objections would be very reasonable. But the movie is a part of a bigger whole. A whole that consistently slants one way.

 

[mkgal1]

For the people that weren't pleased with how the movie was written, I would love to hear their alternate screen play.

Any takers? How would you edit this movie and make it a GREAT movie? What changes would you make? And how would that be portrayed?

 

[chaz345]

Right. I think that when people feel convicted, and they aren't ready to respond, they get defensive.

If you think that that dynamic is at work in my objections you couldn't be more wrong. In fact we lived a good part of the negative dynamics in that movie and I had already responded and repented of some of the specific problematic behaviors of his. My "defensiveness" is based on the fact that people in troubled marriages will see this and men will take on blame that they shouldn't and women will feel enabled to continue on in their own bad behavior until he finally "gets it".

 

[jackpetersen]

For the people that weren't pleased with how the movie was written, I would love to hear their alternate screen play.

Any takers? How would you edit this movie and make it a GREAT movie? What changes would you make? And how would that be portrayed?

The wife would apologize for her part in the problem.

She would recognize where she was selfish.


This movie was written not so much for entertainment as it was to promote a Christian message.

They promoted what they felt was important, and left out what they felt was not important.

Can we have a movie - just one - where the guy is an angel and the woman cheats on him out of boredom and learns her lesson and admits it was her fault? Just one?

 

[chaz345]

For the people that weren't pleased with how the movie was written, I would love to hear their alternate screen play.

Any takers? How would you edit this movie and make it a GREAT movie? What changes would you make? And how would that be portrayed?

The changed needed would add maybe 5 minutes. All that would be needed would be a scene or two where another women "gets in her face" about her bad behavior the same way his co-worker did. That and maybe a scene showing her bad behavior and how it causes him to feel lousy and how it negatively impacts the marriage. An acknowledgement by her that what she did was wrong would help too.

 

[chaz345]

Can we have a movie - just one - where the guy is an angel and the woman cheats on him out of boredom and learns her lesson and admits it was her fault? Just one?

Not until we find someone willing to throw away the money required to produce it because such a movie would never sell.

 

[hijklmnop]

The above post reminds me of the movie Unfaithful. Not that I recommend it (sexually explicit) but that's pretty much what happens...well, anyways, the guy is a good husband and she cheats on him purely out of lust.

 

[jackpetersen]

If you think that that dynamic is at work in my objections you couldn't be more wrong. In fact we lived a good part of the negative dynamics in that movie and I had already responded and repented of some of the specific problematic behaviors of his. My "defensiveness" is based on the fact that people in troubled marriages will see this and men will take on blame that they shouldn't and women will feel enabled to continue on in their own bad behavior until he finally "gets it".

We have a winner!!

The bias is everywhere, and has been in place so long that many women are blind to it (no one notices a bias when it benefits their group).

It is interesting how so many women dismiss mens' complaints out-of-hand, calling it whining, being a baby, having "anger issues", (or hehe -"defensiveness") and other such childish scolding tactics.

We men have spent a few decades listening to every female grievance imaginable - to the point where many women believe that only women are entitled to have their grievances addressed.

Personally, the attitude of some women on this thread convinces me that they don't really care about men much at all unless the men are obeying the female. This is interesting, because it closely resembles the attitude they accuse men of having. Discovering their own fault in others.

 

[hijklmnop]

Ooh yeah and Little Children with Kate Winslet. Um, also R rated.

 

[Created2Write]

For the people that weren't pleased with how the movie was written, I would love to hear their alternate screen play.

Any takers? How would you edit this movie and make it a GREAT movie? What changes would you make? And how would that be portrayed?

As I have said before, the only change I would make is adding the wife's apology. To show her confess her wrongs and apologize for them. It would, for me, make a clearer message and complete the restoration of their relationship.

 

[chaz345]

.

 

[JaneFW]

The above post reminds me of the movie Unfaithful. Not that I recommend it (sexually explicit) but that's pretty much what happens...well, anyways, the guy is a good husband and she cheats on him purely out of lust.

And what was the one with Demi Moore where she initiated the affair with her coworker? There are a bazillion movies out there with "bad women". Fatal Attraction too.

 

[JaneFW]

The changed needed would add maybe 5 minutes. All that would be needed would be a scene or two where another women "gets in her face" about her bad behavior the same way his co-worker did. That and maybe a scene showing her bad behavior and how it causes him to feel lousy and how it negatively impacts the marriage. An acknowledgement by her that what she did was wrong would help too.

A woman did get in her face.