Meh. I've seen cuter. Want to see pictures of my cat?
Your kid's teacher says the kid needs to put forth more effort.
Your kid's teacher says the kid needs to put forth more effort.
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~Anastasia~
† Handmaid of God †
- Dec 1, 2013
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What do you mean my muffin needs to work harder? It's YOUR job to teach him, isn't it??? Obviously YOU must be slacking off!
A friend has a terrible toothache
A friend has a terrible toothache
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Don't bother to go to the dentist. He'll just lecture you to brush your teeth every day, then charge you $500 just for being in his presence.
Your job interviewer looks you in the eye, shakes your hand, smiles, and says "you're hired!"
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forest flower
His beloved daughter
(Assuming the position is nowhere near this high)
About time now where is the CEO office? It'll need a makeover if I'm going to be able to use it.
To your child in a sports event?
About time now where is the CEO office? It'll need a makeover if I'm going to be able to use it.
To your child in a sports event?
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Hey, lady! Have you ever heard of a leash? Google it, and maybe your next pet will live a longer life.
Grocery checker says "Your total comes to $108.56".
Grocery checker says "Your total comes to $108.56".
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Oh great, now you're probably expecting me to say thank you.
Person behind the counter at the Department of Motor Vehicles FINALLY calls your number.
Person behind the counter at the Department of Motor Vehicles FINALLY calls your number.
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americanvet
Saved Sinner
- Jun 15, 2012
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Have you always been this stupid or did you have to train for it.
To your spouse when they've gained weight.
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- Mar 23, 2004
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Need to go shopping fer clothes?
to the driver whose erratic driving appears to be a symptom of road rage
to the driver whose erratic driving appears to be a symptom of road rage
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- Oct 31, 2012
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Im sorry I forgot he was a trained cannibal
When you get a speeding ticket from a policeman
When you get a speeding ticket from a policeman
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You should've moved your big ugly car out of my way!
Kids keep asking and asking and asking you to take them to McDonald's.
Kids keep asking and asking and asking you to take them to McDonald's.
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- Oct 31, 2012
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Do you want to end up looking like Augustus Gloop?
your significant other asks your opinion on clothing
your significant other asks your opinion on clothing
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- Oct 31, 2012
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I have a live piranha that needs feeding can I use your cat?
you submitted an assignment a day late
you submitted an assignment a day late
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