the importance of Virginity?

[UnamSanctam]

but I'm saying that if her Christian friends there found out what she's been doing, they might not like her so much.

Not liking someone just because they had sex is not very "Christian". It's classic American puritanism right there, and it's disgusting.

 

[Mling]

So she gets away with being mean but I don't? OK. The words you use to describe me are way out of line by the way. I just gave her a taste of her own medicine. That's all I did. Why are people so shocked? You should be shocked at HER.

She pointed and laughed at you--a not nice gesture-- but over something that you openly say that you are comfortable with and secure about.

You pointed and laughed at her about something that she told you she had a traumatic history with. Something that was triggering and upsetting to her.

She was uncouth, but then she apologized. You deliberately hurt her in a way guaranteed to cause as much damage as a person can, when they only have words at their disposal. She gave you an opportunity to see her as a human, by exposing a part of herself that makes her vulnerable and fragile* and you responded by sticking a knife in it.

*(not to say that having an unhappy sexual past makes a person especially fragile for the rest of their life. I mean it in the sense in which every person is fragile, if you figure out what matters to them.)

edit: or, to put this in language you can understand better: Before the [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] crowed, Peter slipped up. Judas was evil.

 

[RoseOfJesus]

So I'm evil for what I did? Everybody here is ganging up on me but you forget the fact that I was punishing her, not attacking her. And by punishing I mean putting her in her place. Trust me, she deserved it. If she is hurt then she can blame herself for attacking me first.

 

[Mling]

So I'm evil for what I did? Everybody here is ganging up on me but you forget the fact that I was punishing her, not attacking her. And by punishing I mean putting her in her place. Trust me, she deserved it. If she is hurt then she can blame herself for attacking me first.

"Punish" is just another word for "exact revenge." Even ignoring that, you don't have any right or authority to punish her.

And even ignoring that, punishing somebody for a mistake by using a traumatic history against them is utterly cruel and out of line.

I don't know if you are evil, but what you did certainly was.

Why would I "trust you," that she deserved to have her past ripped open and her face shoved in it? I'm right here, with a scroll bar. I can see how the conversation went for myself. And what you did, at first, was really darn obnoxious. When you found out that it was a sore point and kept stabbing it, yes, that was malicious and evil.

edit: I'm reminded of a recent xkcd comic. "Don't shoot until you can see the whites of their eyes...and smell the scent of their hair...... Don't fire until you can see through the fragile facade to the human being within."

 

[Larry Mondello]

Why is everyone acting like I started the bullying in this thread? Reminisce picked on me, rememeber? It's her fault.

You can all check my post history, I have never even insulted someone before, she is the only who dragged me down to her level.

Rose,
I understand.

In a thread I started similar to this subject on another board, a poster who posted respectful things, while searching for something else, ran across that poster in another thread where he called me a derogatory name (i.e. slang term for a woman’s genitalia).
Honestly had forgotten about the slur.
It was an anti-porn thread. Being the only male in the thread trying to discourage guys from viewing porn, I was an easy target, I guess.

Was incensed !!!
PM’d that poster and I let him have it, accusing him of being a big hypocrite, etc.
Told him I was gonna post all this in the thread bec. I felt the others “needed to know what he was really like….”

Glad I didn’t post that in my thread, as the fighting likely would’ve shut down that thread.
Could've gotten bloody, as I don't suffer fools and won't allow someone to publicly insult me.


While I went off the deep end there, told him this would all end here and go no farther if he went into the other thread and publicly apologized for the name-calling.
Took many PMs, but he apologized (finally).

So would recommend dealing with a rude poster outside of the thread in PMs and try to let it go.




**** Gals, let’s stop ganging-up on the OP here. Or at least let-up on her a little.
Rose isn't that much diff. than the poster who may have touched-off this diversion....

 

[Chajara]

This. Thread. *facepalm*

 

[Reminisce]

"Punish" is just another word for "exact revenge." Even ignoring that, you don't have any right or authority to punish her.

And even ignoring that, punishing somebody for a mistake by using a traumatic history against them is utterly cruel and out of line.

I don't know if you are evil, but what you did certainly was.

Why would I "trust you," that she deserved to have her past ripped open and her face shoved in it? I'm right here, with a scroll bar. I can see how the conversation went for myself. And what you did, at first, was really darn obnoxious. When you found out that it was a sore point and kept stabbing it, yes, that was malicious and evil.

edit: I'm reminded of a recent xkcd comic. "Don't shoot until you can see the whites of their eyes...and smell the scent of their hair...... Don't fire until you can see through the fragile facade to the human being within."

Thanks for all your support. <3
I appreciate it.

I don't think people understand how painful this topic is to me, and I wish I could say "I blame myself, I started it", but I didn't. What this girl has done is beyond any rationalization. To have my own past ripped open and trampled on and ridiculed in a public forum... I don't even care if people know I'm not a virgin, I just don't want to talk about it.

Rose, I think you are a very disturbed individual. Please get help.

Remy

 

[Larry Mondello]

I don't think people understand how painful this topic is to me, and I wish I could say "I blame myself, I started it", but I didn't. What this girl has done is beyond any rationalization. To have my own past ripped open and trampled on and ridiculed in a public forum... I don't even care if people know I'm not a virgin, I just don't want to talk about it.

Rose, I think you are a very disturbed individual. Please get help.

C'mon, Reminisce.
I asked you girls to quit egging it on.
Accomplishing nothin'.

Methinks both sides here hold some fault. Let's call it a day and get back to talkin' about the importance of virginity...

 

[Reminisce]

Excuse me? It was me she attacked!

And you tell me to stop egging it on?

 

[quatona]

Is this kindergarten, or what?
How do you guys - sorry: gals - manage to take offense from what some strangers on the internet say?
Can the personal stuff stop, please?

 

[Chajara]

 

[Larry Mondello]

Excuse me? It was me she attacked!

And you tell me to stop egging it on?

Step into the middle of a dog fight -- I mean cat fight -- guess am gonna get bit (or scratched).

Seriously, let's cool it down here.

 

[JustMeSee]

Apparently, the idea of virginity is very important to some people.

 

[RoadWarrior]

Apparently, the idea of virginity is very important to some people.

Agreed. My guess is the idea is especially important for parents of female minors and even those who are 18-25. Pregnancy, at least according to the Santorum Doctrine, would ruin their lives if engaged immaturely or ill thought out.

 

[JustMeSee]

Sounds like this thread is appropriate right now:
http://www.christianforums.com/t7648728/

 

[Mling]

Sounds like this thread is appropriate right now:
http://www.christianforums.com/t7648728/

Yeah, I know... The irony is just...it would be hilarious if it wasn't so nausea-inducing.

"Why oh why can't girls just get along!"
"Oh, she wasn't nice to me, so I'm going to get her back by rubbing her face in traumatic sexual experiences she didn't even want in the first place!"

I can just imagine how she handles other situations. "Hey! Tiny Tim poked my foot with his crutch! What'sa matter? Jealous that God loved me enough to make me whole? You know why you're like that right? Your mom was a harlot, and you're her punishment." "What? What's wrong? He poked me--I'm punishing him."

 

[Mling]

How on earth does not being a virgin ruin a wedding?

Yeah, that too. I mean, it's not likely that that's new information on the wedding day. And to most people it's just...life as usual. I used to have a life's goal of having all of my ex's at my wedding (used to, just because it turns out that I'm only going to have one ex, though she'll almost certainly be there, so that's cool).

 

[selfinflikted]

Yeah, that too. I mean, it's not likely that that's new information on the wedding day. And to most people it's just...life as usual. I used to have a life's goal of having all of my ex's at my wedding (used to, just because it turns out that I'm only going to have one ex, though she'll almost certainly be there, so that's cool).

You wanted all your ex's there so you could be all like, "SEE ME NAO!? This coulda been YOU standing here with me!"

..or is it because you intended to still be friends with all of them? (I'm sure this, but it's certainly more boring than the first )

 

[Mling]

You wanted all your ex's there so you could be all like, "SEE ME NAO!? This coulda been YOU standing here with me!"

..or is it because you intended to still be friends with all of them? (I'm sure this, but it's certainly more boring than the first )

Lol! No--because I want to still be friends. I wouldn't invite somebody who wouldn't be genuinely happy to be there.

My one ex actually ended up becoming my partner's best friend, so...that's convenient.

 

[selfinflikted]

Lol! No--because I want to still be friends. I wouldn't invite somebody who wouldn't be genuinely happy to be there.

My one ex actually ended up becoming my partner's best friend, so...that's convenient.

That's great