Thank you for sharing parts of your story. I, too, was raised in a Christian household. I'm sure each of our stories is precious to God.
Christians usually ask skeptics to read the Bible. You say this would be the worst possible advice. Is it bec you were reading OT?
Mostly. But there were a few things in the New Testament that gave me concern as well. I remember wondering why Jesus never wrote anything down. I believe it was Mark Twain who said “
a foolish mans account of a wise mans words are never accurate; because he has to translate what he hears into something he can actually understand” So we have God’s son coming to Earth, he teaches and preaches for 30+ years but because he doesn’t write anything down, we have to depend on foolish men’s account of this wise and words and wondering if it was accurate. Then when I got to know people of other religions learning that some of the foolish men’s account isn’t from the Christian perspective but of other religions where Jesus does not claimed to be God’s son nor was he crucified.
Then there were things like when Jesus prayed in the Garden of Gethesemane and detailed accounts are given of his praying and I wondered, who witnessed this? His disciples were asleep! Or when the Pharisee came to Jesus alone in the middle of the night, who witnessed these events in order to get someone to write about it? Or in the Corinthians where it says
flesh and bone will not enter the kingdom of heaven, so you would think after Jesus died, he would leave his earthly body behind because his flesh and bone (earthly body) can’t go to heaven right? But according to the bible it did.
Most of my issues with the OT are what I would consider immoral issues and unrealistic issues, and most of my issues with the NT are probably contradictions and unrealistic issues.
Would you mind sharing your opinion about the Bible and what you found to be offensive?
I believe men of war will worship a God of war; men of peace will worship a God of peace. I believe men like Moses, Saul, and others were men of war and when they made up a God, it was a God of war; a God that shared their values. I believe Jesus was a (God) man of peace, and when peaceful men of that day wanted a God that shared their values, Jesus was it. That’s why I see a contradiction between the claims of Yahweh and Jesus even though they are supposed to be one and the same. Like how Yahweh instructs how to treat your enemies in Numbers 31:17-18 vs how Jesus instructs how to treat your enemies in Matthew 5:39. What I find offensive in the OT is the actions of those men of war. I don’t believe they were receiving divine instructions, I believe they were claiming divine instructions as an excuse to do what they wanted to do. I remember an old church mother once told me; when your God hates the exact same people that you hate, that’s when you know your God was created in YOUR image, and not you in his. I believe those men of war were creating a God in their image.
When you prayed to God to save you, what made you think you weren't already saved?
The church I went to taught that you will know it when you get saved. I was only going by what I was taught.
Were you in a very fundamentalist denomination?
I went to a Church of God in Christ (COGIC)
Why do you think you're not saved now?
I no longer believe in God
What is the definition of salvation?
Different people will have a different interpretation of what Salvation means. In the Church I went to, salvation was deliverance from sin and given the Holy Spirit as a guide.
Sorry for all the questions. I'm interested in your opinion and, of course, you don't need to explain anything that you don't want to. If you so choose you can send me a private message or respond in this thread.
No problem, I don’t mind answering questions.