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"I'm offended".
How many times in our lives have we heard that statement? Or perhaps a better question would be, how many times in our lives have we made that statement?
It has often been said that offense is not given, it's taken, but I believe that statement is only half true. Offense most certainly can be given. It is the intent and motive of the speaker that determines whether offense was given. Have you ever heard someone say that they are going to do something just because they know it will get a rise out of another person? That person is choosing to give offense, the goal being to evoke a negative reaction from the one they are offending.
However, even when offense is given, it must also be taken to be effective. Just because someone gives you offense doesn't mean you should take it.
In 1 Corinthians 13:5, the Amplified Bible talks about the Love that we are all supposed to exhibit and what our response to offenses should be like (emphasis added);
Proverbs tells us this;
Overlooking an offense requires an active demonstration of the Love of God that lives and abides within us. It requires us to crucify our flesh. It's not fair.
Tenth Avenue North correctly states in their song "Losing" that when we forgive an offense, we feel like the one that is "losing". The lyrics state;
It does no one any good to have an academic discussion about the grace and mercy of God, claiming to understand His grace and mercy while failing to demonstrate it pragmatically. There is no better time to demonstrate one's understanding of the grace of God than when offense comes. When the world sees a person who talks about God's grace and mercy but then sees that same person demanding vindication and restitution for a wrong done to them, they quickly see the hypocrisy. But when the world sees a person who demonstrates the grace and mercy that they talk about, it is a powerful demonstration of how God's Love, grace and mercy can change a person and enable them to put into practice that which they talk about.
God's Love can empower us to overlook offenses toward us and through His grace, there can come a day where you will never again say the words, "I'm offended".
How many times in our lives have we heard that statement? Or perhaps a better question would be, how many times in our lives have we made that statement?
It has often been said that offense is not given, it's taken, but I believe that statement is only half true. Offense most certainly can be given. It is the intent and motive of the speaker that determines whether offense was given. Have you ever heard someone say that they are going to do something just because they know it will get a rise out of another person? That person is choosing to give offense, the goal being to evoke a negative reaction from the one they are offending.
However, even when offense is given, it must also be taken to be effective. Just because someone gives you offense doesn't mean you should take it.
In 1 Corinthians 13:5, the Amplified Bible talks about the Love that we are all supposed to exhibit and what our response to offenses should be like (emphasis added);
1 Corinthians 13:5 (AMP)
It (Love) is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (Gods love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong].
Note that the Love of God is not touchy and it takes no account of the evil done to it. When we choose to take offense, whether it was given or not, we are choosing to be touchy. We are choosing to take account of it. We are choosing to pay attention to it.It (Love) is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (Gods love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong].
Proverbs tells us this;
Proverbs 19:11 (ESV)
Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.
Overlooking an offense goes against our human nature. When we are offended, our carnal flesh desires for everyone to know it, to see it. That's why we announce "I'm offended", because it places the attention on us. But in choosing to take offense, we are also choosing to feed our flesh.Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.
Overlooking an offense requires an active demonstration of the Love of God that lives and abides within us. It requires us to crucify our flesh. It's not fair.
Tenth Avenue North correctly states in their song "Losing" that when we forgive an offense, we feel like the one that is "losing". The lyrics state;
Why do we think that hate's gonna change their heart?
We're up in arms over wars that don't need to be fought
But pride won't let us lay our weapons on the ground
We build our bridges up but just to burn them down
We think pain is owed apologies and then it'll stop
But truth be told it doesn't matter if they're sorry or not
Freedom comes when we surrender to the sound
Of mercy and Your grace, Father, send Your angels down
Tenth Avenue North: Losing
Pride, insecurity and immaturity prevent us from overlooking offenses. We need to let people know that what that person said about us is not true or what they did was wrong and offensive. The insecurity that we possess in our flesh desires a vindication for the wrongs we've suffered. The immaturity in us requires an apology. But God tells us that we should not repay those who wrong us;We're up in arms over wars that don't need to be fought
But pride won't let us lay our weapons on the ground
We build our bridges up but just to burn them down
We think pain is owed apologies and then it'll stop
But truth be told it doesn't matter if they're sorry or not
Freedom comes when we surrender to the sound
Of mercy and Your grace, Father, send Your angels down
Tenth Avenue North: Losing
Romans 12:19 (AMP)
Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave the way open for [Gods] wrath; for it is written, Vengeance is Mine, I will repay (requite), says the Lord.
Our flesh feels like if we just had an apology, everything would be better. An apology that is demanded is a result of our carnal flesh's need for restitution. But as the lyrics above state, it really doesn't matter if they're sorry or not. Freedom comes when we surrender to God's grace and mercy, or more accurately when we demonstrate that grace and mercy to those who offend us.Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave the way open for [Gods] wrath; for it is written, Vengeance is Mine, I will repay (requite), says the Lord.
It does no one any good to have an academic discussion about the grace and mercy of God, claiming to understand His grace and mercy while failing to demonstrate it pragmatically. There is no better time to demonstrate one's understanding of the grace of God than when offense comes. When the world sees a person who talks about God's grace and mercy but then sees that same person demanding vindication and restitution for a wrong done to them, they quickly see the hypocrisy. But when the world sees a person who demonstrates the grace and mercy that they talk about, it is a powerful demonstration of how God's Love, grace and mercy can change a person and enable them to put into practice that which they talk about.
God's Love can empower us to overlook offenses toward us and through His grace, there can come a day where you will never again say the words, "I'm offended".