Suffering from OCB

[HeatherG]

Quote from MarcB:

Entertain this idea: If scripture said the unpardonable sin was something random, like thinking about a purple fish, I say confidently those of us with OCD would have responded the same way as with the blasphemy issue. Let's say we then found out our translation was inaccurate and it was actually a green fish, and not only green, but a frog. Would we have followed the same pattern of thinking and self-condemnation?

Marc, you make me laugh out loud. Yes, I would definitely have been there with you ruminating over purple fish and green frogs. You know I just can't get over how amazing this forum is, where I can actually find people who think like me. I don't know anyone in real life with this problem. Hearing from you guys really reinforces that it is an illness and not a sin problem. I sure wish I had found this forum 16 years ago instead of after God had already got me sorted out.

Now consider the real scripture: Christians are told, "when you heard the word of truth, the good news of your salvation and believed, YOU WERE SEALED WITH THE PROMISED HOLY SPIRIT" (Ephesians 1:13).
SEALED BABY! WE ARE LOCKED IN THANKS TO GOD'S AMAZING PLAN -- NOT OURS!

Amen, brother!

Heather

 

[Liftyourhand7]

Marc , I have to say with Heather Amen too, This also made me laugh, and believe me lately I have not laughed very much thank you brother for keeping things light. Blessings Jan

 

[gracealone]

So VERY, VERY true of the OCD mind. The mind says the thing we don't want it to say, because we don't want it to say it and therefore we are extremely focused on it because of the fear it creates.. and then UH OH!!, too late the "purple fish" digs it's fins in to our brain and becomes a sharK!! Thanks Marc, for sharing your battles in such a clear and honest way. It does help all of us to know that, Yep, it's the OCD, and those of us afflicted with it really know what your talking about.
Blessings,
Mitzi

 

[unpardoned1]

Thanks for your replies. I have just checked in and was suprised. I will keep reading them, because they really do encourage me. I think of my brothers and sisters on this site who have the same ocd issues I do. Its nice to know that I'm not alone.

 

[michaelj77]

Hi Lis,
Its been some time, just wondering how you are. Have you been able to see a doctor? Just want you to know that we've been praying for you and I know that God's in control of your situation though the night may seem to be long and dark.
I too felt lonely and helpless when I first started off and I didn't know about this forum. I wish I had known about it earlier. But now since I know all you people its been really encouraging! So do write and let us know.
Hope you Mitzy and Marc are fighting the good fight of faith too! And the enemy has not won over you!
God bless you all!!
micheal

 

[michaelj77]

Hi, I have a prayer request which I would like to share with u. Please pray that God will guide me regarding a church. I've been attending a church for about 3 years, but I feel the ministry oppertunities I have there are limited. I really want to be involved in serving the Lord in a young adults group. I've been attending another church where there's a dynamic pastor and I enjoy the worship and his vision. So I feel i can grow in God more here. You know earlier I felt away from God and serving Him was a big burden. But now with the meds helping and the Lord's grace I want to step out again to do more for the Lord.
The thing is it is a sensitive issue, and my brothers and sisters in church may misunderstand. I want them to still be my friends even though I move to another church.
I'm not sure about it yet, so please pray for God's leading.
I'm hoping to start studying for a MBA also and I know it'll be tough with work. So there are many things I need to juggle around these days... I feel stressed out
I'm sorry if I'm being a burden, I needed to share this with you all. I hope you don't mind.
Lets share one another's burdens and confusions too so we can help each other out. I'm ready to listen too!!
Bye & love to all,
micheal

 

[gracealone]

Hi Michael,
I will be sure to pray about those concerns. I tend to obsess a lot about hurting people's feelings also, so I understand your concern.
You aren't being a burden, you are doing the right thing in asking for prayer.
God Bless,
Mitzi

 

[michaelj77]

Hi Jan,
I forgot your name and mistakedly referred to Lis. Sorry I meant the following post for you. Hope things are better for you now.
God bless
micheal

Hi Jan,
Its been some time, just wondering how you are. Have you been able to see a doctor? Just want you to know that we've been praying for you and I know that God's in control of your situation though the night may seem to be long and dark.
I too felt lonely and helpless when I first started off and I didn't know about this forum. I wish I had known about it earlier. But now since I know all you people its been really encouraging! So do write and let us know.
Hope you Mitzy and Marc are fighting the good fight of faith too! And the enemy has not won over you!
God bless you all!!
micheal

 

[Liftyourhand7]

Hi Micheal, Thank you for asking about me, Right now I am really struggling so I could really use your prayers, I did see my Doctor yesterday HE really feels that right now I need to start on meds, I however am fighting that a little bit, I will tell you though my joy is zapped right now, I just want the joy of the Lord back so much, I do trust him but I am very weak right now because of this thing, It took everything in me yesterday to let my family physcian know what was going on, I just sat there crying for a few minutes when he walked into the room, but He was very kind and just waited for me to cry it out. He agreed that I was suffering from OCD and that I needed some medical help, but I am not very good at taking medication, so I still haven't taken what he gave me (I'm not a very good patient.) How are you doing? What kinds of things do you find helpful for we suffering with OCD?I am keeping in God's word no matter if I can only read one verse, its just so hard this condition, I suffer more with depression than with panic attacks, sometimes I wish I would just have a panic attack be done with it and not feel so depressed all of the time, but I'm sure those that have panic atttacks feel just the opposiste. WEll brother please keep me in your prayers I really need them. Have a blessed day and I will try to too. Blessings Jan

 

[unpardoned1]

Don't fight the meds, they can help you get back on track. I take paxil, when I was on 30 mg it was all I needed. After I went down some, I take klonipin and it helps me to calm down.

I hope this helps.

 

[Liftyourhand7]

Thank you so much pardoned one, I really appreciate you telling me not to fight this medication, I think I need to at least try it, it really might help. I hope you are doing well and God bless you for helping people on this board. Have a blessed Day Jan

 

[Liftyourhand7]

Hi Family, I really need your guys prayers today, I am not doing well at all, and I have my son's graduation to attend tomorrow night, may I ask for a specific prayer, that the Lord will give me joy to make it through tomorrow, that's all I really want. I don't want my son to see me crying and having a bad day. He is such a loving and caring kid and I want this day to be totally about his accomplishments, I need all of you so much to be praying for this, Thank you I know I will make it because I have all of you! God BLess Jan P.S. by the way my son's name is Brian.

 

[michaelj77]

Hi Jan,
I'm sure your'e son's graduation went off well!! Thought of posting to find out how you've been since its been some time since the last post.
Well I hope you are taking the meds prescribed by the doctor. I hope that the doctor didn't give you a high dose at once, but started with a low dosage and gradually increased it over a period of weeks. If you feel the meds are too strong - (side effects such as feeling weak, tiredness, 'drugged' feeling or insomnia ) you can ask the doctor about it. Also the side effects reduce after about a week. The key word is patience - its tough at the start I know.
So do write to us on the progress. I'm glad that Jan shared about her son's graduation so we could pray for her. SO Why don't we share our needs and burdens with each other?
I've had a 50/ 50 week - days I've felt like having constant OCD and really anxious, but today I'm quite fine. I guess what I've learned is not to let the sickness get on top of me, but thank God for what He's done for me. Thank you Jesus!! Please pray that I wil be able to cope up with work and studying for a MBA.
God bless you all and keep writing!!
Love
Micheal

 

[Liftyourhand7]

Hi Micheal, I really liked what you said about sharing our burdens, we all need to remember to pray for each other (so important). I will pray for you. I have not started my meds yet, I am still struggling with getting started, I really believe that God does want me to start on meds but I just can't yet bring myself to do it. I am so tired and stressed out all of the time, after sleeping 8 hours or more at night I wake up feeling burdened and not like I have rested at all, I have numbness in my hands and in my face (stress) all of the time. My thoughts seem to be overtaking me and my body is feeling it. I just can't believe how this disorder can make me feel so physically sick. I am suppose to see my doctor in another week He thinks I have been on the meds for two weeks already, I think he might be a little upset with me ( I am a very difficult patient.) I guess I think meds are OK for everyone except me. The sadness of constant depression is always on me. Please continue praying for me you guys don't give up on me. I know i can be a little difficult to deal with, I have gotten alot of great advice from all of you. I just can't seem to get started with the hard work I know I must do. I am scared of exposure response therapy, How many of you have done this therapy and has it helped? I keep hearing that medication alone does not really help this disorder. Thank you all that have given me such great advice you are probably thinking what else can you tell me. I am just a mess. Oh well now that I have complained so much I hope some of you out there won't be afraid to really tell me what you think. BLessings Jan

 

[Liftyourhand7]

Hi brothers and sisters, I just want each one of you on the forum to know that I am praying for you daily, One of the things that I believe that the Lord is wanting me to tell you is what the Apostle Paul wrote about, and that is just pressing on knowing that Jesus loves us, we can trust him, so many of us here "feel" as though we are going to hell, I know that "Feeling" well, its one of the biggest lies that satan would love us to believe. Please don't give up or give into that deception. I know for we with OCD that this challenge is a difficult one for us, "Jesus will never leave us or forsake us" if our salvation depended on us we most certainly would be in trouble, however we are not holding on to God He is holding onto us, He is not looking for ways to keep you out of heaven, He wants you to be with him, please understand that He loves you and me far more than we could ever understand, its an amzing love that our finite little minds cannot understand. Please today no matter what your feelings are saying to you just press on, trust the Lord your God, don't give up He can and will bring joy to your life again. Remember He has you in his strong loving arms He has not let go of you. You are the Love of his life and the apple of his eye whether you "feel" that way or not. I Love you. Jan

 

[gracealone]

HI Jan,
Such awesome advice!! "For if our heart condemns us God is greater than our hearts."
Love you TOO!
Mitzi