Hi everyone - I'm new to this so please forgive me if I get this wrong. Alright - I will try to tell you the story and my problem as best I can. I worked at a place for 4 years, never had any problems with anyone, then one day a new employee came to work. She seemed like a nice enough person and I enjoyed working with her. Then one day in the evening, I got a call from her. She was desparately looking for a place to move into right away because she was having some domestic violence problem with her father. She was married at the time and had two little kids. She called me up because she said she didn't have anyone else she could turn to and she remembered that I had mentioned having some empty rooms in my house. I had no intentions of renting out my rooms at the time, but when she called and explained her situation to me, I felt compassion for them and took them in. From that moment on, we worked and lived under the same roof and we quickly became inseparable friends. She called me at all hours of the day and night with all kinds of problems, and I assisted her as best I could. She was also having terrible arguments with her husband at the time and eventually she got a divorce. When she got the divorce, she was afraid of how she would be able to survive because she was in financial debt and was not making enough money. Also, the fathers of her two kids were not paying child support. I was moved by her situation and I offered to help her out financially. I promised her that I would watch her back for her, that she didn't have to worry about paying rent, and not to worry about becoming homeless or hungry. I told her that as long as I was around, I would watch over her and her kids to make sure that they were safe. In keeping with my promise to her, I paid off her financial debts, made sure they had food, and took care of her kids for her. When she wasn't home because of work or whatever, I baby sat the kids, fed them, and tucked them in. I took them to the park, and I spent time with them. I assisted my friend with whatever problem she had including legal, and work related. After about a year, she decided to move out. I assisted her in moving out. However, this is when the problem began. When she moved out, I realized that I had grown to trust her and rely on her. She had been my closest companion and friend next to my wife and step daughter. Also, during the time we worked together, she had expressed her feelings toward me in a romantic way on 2 possibly 3 times but I quickly rejected her idea because I'm married and she was 25 and I was 42. However, a year later, when she moved out, I realized that I had fallen in love with this young lady and I was not in love with my wife. I love my wife, but I was never in love with her and my wife knew this from the beginning when I married her. I married her under a very emotional situation, she threatened to commit suicide if I left when we were dating, out of compassion for her and her 3 year old daughter, I proposed to marry her. This young lady at work knew about the circumstances that I had gotten married because I had told her. Anyway, when I realized how I felt about my friend, I told her the truth. I told her that I was in love with her and that I was thinking about getting a divorce. From that point on, things just stopped making sense to me. I was hurt, I was confused and conflicted about the whole thing because I didn't want to lose my friendship and I didn't want to cause pain to the people I loved. From the moment I told my friend about how I felt about her, she got upset with me and started accusing me of doing all kinds of things with an alterior motive. This was absolutely not true and I tried to explain this to her, but she wouldn't listen to me. Eventually, after several months of her not tallking to me, and feeling horrible at work, I decided to quit. When I left, she stopped communicating to me, however, I continued to assist her with her financial obligations because I loved and cared about her and her kids. In time, she started communicating with me again and things seemed to be getting back on track. However, I told her that while I still had these strong feelings of affection for her, and that my marriage was not what I had wanted in life, I was not going to get a divorce because I did not want to inflict pain to my wife or step daughter. I felt my wife and step daughter did not deserve to be hurt like that. My friend said that she thought of me like a father figure and I told her that in away, I thought of her as family and as a daughter and her kids were like my kids. I told her that I felt honored and priviledged that she would consider me in such a role. We even talked about me adopting them as my family members. Anyway, several weeks after that conversation, her B-day came along and I sent her a gift to express how moved and honored I was that she would consider me as a father figure. After I sent her the gift, however, I never heard back from her. Instead, weeks went by, and after trying to get a hold of her by calling and emailing her, I decided to call her at work. When I did this, she wouldn't talk to me and hung up. I then got an email from her stating that if I didn't stop contacting her, she would get a restraining order. Well, I was dismayed, frustrated, and hurt by her actions. Then while doing a random search on the internet, I came across a photo gallery that she had posted. On the gallery was a section to post comments, so I did. The next day, she filed a restraining order on me and I have not been able to talk to her since then. To say the least, I'm feeling betrayed, hurt, frustrated and I'm missing someone whom I thought was my friend. I never lied to her, betrayed her, took advantage of her, called her names, threatened her or even raised my voice to her. I know that I am to blame for what has happened, but is this what I deserve? Maybe it is and I just don't know it. What could I have done differently to have prevented this from happening? What would you have done if you had been in my place. I never looked for this to happen. I would appreciate all of your suggestions and opinions because I'm having a difficult time getting through this and I'm feeling very foolish, alone and confused. I am a Christian, and I wanted to do the right thing from the very beginning. I wanted to act in a way that would have glorified the Lord by helping this family out but I let my guard down and my worldly spirit got the best of me and messed everything up. Thank you for your compassion. 
