Stages of falling in love

[JPPT1974]

Thanks. Aaaaaaaaah, Atkins. I have that book. lol Believe it or not, I like exercise but I can't convince my brain of this fact. Lifting weights feels good to me in some weird way. My day-job has a fitness center available to me 24/7. I am prone to self-destructive behaviours I guess (thankfully drugs, alcohol, gambling and sex were never in the mix). I know fat can be changed...the ugly could too if I had a lot of money. lol

Seriously though...it's my life in general that I find truly ugly. I hate the fact that no matter what I do I can't stay caught up....much less get ahead.

Back to the OP, falling in love......stay tuned....I'm sure I'll have another brilliant thought before the weekend is over. lol

Hope that you do fall in love if it's the Lord's will. And that my life can be boring because I am not the life of the party. And that I do like to exercise as it is one of my few "good vices!"

 

[Tink]

Hey thanks. I love your hair too. I just wish I could see a better picture of you than that lowlight webcam schmack (if this implies that I am insulting your photography skills, then yes I am )! But you have nice hair though.

HEY! It's not my fault the camera sucks. :x That straight hair business in my photo isn't how my hair is naturally. I have very curly hair. Maybe I'll send you a picture or something.

And thanks for the compliment.

In His love,
Tink

 

[JPPT1974]

HEY! It's not my fault the camera sucks. :x That straight hair business in my photo isn't how my hair is naturally. I have very curly hair. Maybe I'll send you a picture or something.

And thanks for the compliment.

In His love,
Tink

Well, I would love to see how your hair looked like. You are welcome indeed.

 

[Tink]

Well, I would love to see how your hair looked like. You are welcome indeed.

There you go, JPPT!

In His love,
Tink

 

[Tuffguy]

I'll admit that i'm not physically attractive. I've pretty much been made fun of all my life or people ignore me like they can't deal with the fact that i'm ugly. That said , I don't want someone to say i wouldn't be a good mate b/c i'm ugly. If I could be beautiful I would, but there are some things you just can't change. I would hope someone would look at the beauty of my character, but i guess the world just doesn't work that way, no matter if you are a Chrisitan or not. It makes me sad and it makes me feel like a bad person- that I have nothing to offer.

If I may be really honest, it hurts very badly to know that a man will probably not love me because he will not be attracted to me based on looks and that my character really means nothing in this area- unless I was cute. I know that different men find different things attractive, but i have never known a guy to ever seriously have been attracted to my looks. It can be quite upsetting.

Mina, i feel ya girl.
I was a late bloomer,, not to say that i'm some stud now, lol, but i'm better then i was in high school! I got to college, realized i didn't know how to talk to girls, realized i was a skinny kid w/o much confidence. However, i was going to do the most with what God gave me. I started weight training, and in the next 3 yrs i gained about 35-40lbs. Ya, i know this all sounds very superficial, but it changed who i was. I got more confidence, and i started being alot more comfortable in my own skin. This in turn made me much more comfortable and docile with the opposite sex.
Now, i'm sure not saying you need to go do heavy weight training to be more attractive. My point is that you need to do the most with what God gave you and then be happy with that. Even force yourself to be happy with that. Clothes, the right makeup, taking care of yourself the best you can,,,,,all of these things make you feel better about yourself. People that feel good about themselves attract others.
You have it set in your mind that you're not that attractive. You need to get rid of that viewpoint because (this is very frank) no guy wants to deal with a girl that thinks low of themselves. How can i be comfortable around a girl if she isn't even comfortable around herself? Its impossible, and will drive men away faster then Rosie O'donald in a school girl outfit.

 

[mina]

Well I do try. I don't just sit around and make a point to look aweful. I wear makeup that enhances what I do have, I love clothes and always try to dress in a way that looks attractive for me, I try to get my hair cut in a way that flatters me. But, even with that I'm not pretty. I'm just not. I don't even tell people about my issues. The only people i've told in real life is my sunday school teacher and my mom. I try to forget about it and be jovial and then someone from out of the blue will tell me I don't look right or make fun of a feature I have. And it hurts. But I don't ever let anyone see me cry.

 

[the_man]

There you go, JPPT!

In His love,
Tink

If I ever hear you say you are unnattractive or anything of the sort I will ...



























...call you a LIAR!!!

 

[JPPT1974]

There you go, JPPT!

In His love,
Tink

Thanks very much! She is indeed pretty. Very, very, pretty!

 

[HoosierCanuck]

agreed. You're pretty, Tink

I'd upload a photo but it would probably cause the site to be shut down for fear of mad cow disease or something. haha

 

[the_man]

I'd upload a photo but it would probably cause the site to be shut down for fear of mad cow disease or something. haha

Whatever

 

[Fatolia]

agreed. You're pretty, Tink

I'd upload a photo but it would probably cause the site to be shut down for fear of mad cow disease or something. haha

Yeah I wish you'd stop. You're really not that bad looking. Like tuffguy said, a lot of it is your attitude about yourself.

Get your perpectives in order.

I've been known to get down on myself for not looking 'hot' to young ladies. I've never had that youthful rock star vigor that a lot of sixteen through twenty-five year old women seem to flock to. It took me a while to realize that I don't fit the stereotype.

People have told me that I've got a "curious handsomeness," but I didn't listen, and somewhere inside I kept desiring that "hot" or "cute" label. What I chose to ignore is that there are whole legions of women who appreciate the intellectual, handsome, more distinguished and older looking men. I've always looked and acted 10 years older than I am for some reason (even when I was a toddler some tell me), so I've never fit with my peer group but get along very, very nicely with people ten years my senior. Try to find the good in what you have and don't worry if you don't fit the supermodel stereotype.

Believe it or not (and this is kind of scary to me), I sometimes get weird crushes on divorced women in their thirties. Probably because they seem to be more open, loving, and understanding than late teen and twenty-something women.

And I just don't get what's the physical difference between an attractive woman in her twenties and an attractive woman in her thirties. They've all got the same stuff!

 

[CRCDude]

And I just don't get what's the physical difference between an attractive woman in her twenties and an attractive woman in her thirties. They've all got the same stuff!

This is so true.

I just had a thought.
It is unfortunate that people give hollywood so much power. We seem to elevate actors to the status of gods when in truth most of the hollywood types are as fake as one can be and still not look fake(some do look very fake). Still we seem to look at them as the gold standard for what is attractive or not. Very unfortunate.
I'm not sure if anyone has brought up this point yet there are alot of post in this thread.
My point being everyone I think has there own beauty, it's true that beauty gets buried under tons of baggage or bad attitudes. And sometimes the affects of sin can even take there toll on us physically, but yet I beleive that beauty is still there. God didn't make a mistake when he created us, and alot of people seem to have the attitude that He did make a mistake. Why did God have to make me like this? I hear that alot. I have even asked that question myself on occasion. I find it significant that the bible describes Jesus as not being one to behold. or not drawing people to him because of his looks, yet they loved him all the same. This threads title is stages of falling in love, I think the first stage of falling in love is having a loving spirit. My mom often told me "You have to be a friend to make friends" I think the same applies to love you have to show someone love if you want them to love you back. Well again I find myself preaching I'm sorry for that I know alot of people don't like that, but you know I have been learning alot myself as I am typing right now. Sometimes you can answer your own questions by just rambling I think thats why alot of people have journals, but this is off topic I will quit now I promise.

God Bless

 

[Sketcher]

Believe it or not (and this is kind of scary to me), I sometimes get weird crushes on divorced women in their thirties. Probably because they seem to be more open, loving, and understanding than late teen and twenty-something women.

They're probably a little more mature and since they are hurt by the divorce, more emotionally vunerable. You know what that means . . .

 

[HoosierCanuck]

They're probably a little more mature and since they are hurt by the divorce, more emotionally vunerable. You know what that means . . .

No, I don't know what that means......please explain.

Yeah, divorce hurt me but the marriage hurt worse. I don't consider myself emotionally vulnerable. The divorce made me a stronger person. That may be hard to believe when I comment on the looks and such but overall I am a MUCH stronger person than I was during that 2 years of h***.

For Fatolia....okay, so I'm not a dog...but I suck at having pictures taken! lol

 

[Tink]

For Fatolia....okay, so I'm not a dog...but I suck at having pictures taken! lol

I'd personally like to see a photo of you! And no lines about things breaking! You can feel free to PM me, sister!

In His love,
Tink

 

[JPPT1974]

No, I don't know what that means......please explain.

Yeah, divorce hurt me but the marriage hurt worse. I don't consider myself emotionally vulnerable. The divorce made me a stronger person. That may be hard to believe when I comment on the looks and such but overall I am a MUCH stronger person than I was during that 2 years of h***.

For Fatolia....okay, so I'm not a dog...but I suck at having pictures taken! lol

I am so sorry that divorce hurt you my friend. But also glad that it has made you a stronger person. Glad you came out of it.

 

[Fatolia]

I should dig up that candid shot I took of HC when we hung out....

 

[HoosierCanuck]

I should dig up that candid shot I took of HC when we hung out....

did you take one when i was picking my nose? j/k!!!!!

 

[JPPT1974]

Breaking somebody in the nose really, really hurts I heard.

 

[Fatolia]

huh? where did we get to breaking someone in the nose?

Actually, HC, I think the picture was when all those Fusion guys were flirting with you.