Single and closer to 40

[Ronit]

I'm very single and close to 40 and while that makes me a bit uncomfortable for the reasons that a are basically cultural. You know little girls always dress up as brides and pretend that their hero will be there. But what if that never happened? Do you move on to other dreams. I have. But I still want that man that God has for me, if indeed he has one for me. I know I sound like I'm doubting and I am because marriage is not promised. Heck life isn't promised it's a gift. I know this.
I guess finding someone in middle age is good because all the hormone stuff has pretty much past and now you look forward to something solid. Stability.
But I don't ever want to lose that sparkle. The sparkle of love that two people have like when old flames are reunited.
Sorry for my romantic rant.
Romance-anyone notice it has the word Rome in it?

 

[JustSomeBloke]

But I don't ever want to lose that sparkle. The sparkle of love that two people have like when old flames are reunited.

Isn't it just the sweetest thing when you see an elderly couple in their 70s or 80s holding hands?

 

[bèlla]

One of the reasons gratitude practices are championed by many is the recollection effect it produces. We recall the good in daily increments and see it in relation to what exists and what we're waiting on. Thus, a faithful God who demonstrated His hand in our lives in other places. Is the same God operating in the areas where movement isn't evident.

~Bella

 

[Ronit]

One of the reasons gratitude practices are championed by many is the recollection effect it produces. We recall the good in daily increments and see it in relation to what exists and what we're waiting on. Thus, a faithful God who demonstrated His hand in our lives in other places. Is the same God operating in the areas where movement isn't evident.

~Bella

Yes. I like that!

 

[bèlla]

Yes. I like that!

Ann Voskamp’s 1000 Gifts is nice. I used to count daily joy dares in the past. I wrote them down at first. Then I collected them in the Project Life app and made weekly spreads instead. They can be printed or added to a book. Its a nice way of recollecting what He’s done.

~Bella

 

[Ronit]

Ann Voskamp’s 1000 Gifts is nice. I used to count daily joy dares in the past. I wrote them down at first. Then I collected them in the Project Life app and made weekly spreads instead. They can be printed or added to a book. Its a nice way of recollecting what He’s done.

~Bella

Cool!

 

[Willing-heart]

I think you should keep praying for a spouse and at the same time lead a normal social life and, when you do pray, tell God your desires and then place it in His hand and then put your desires in neutral and let God lead the way. God bless

 

[Ronit]

I think you should keep praying for a spouse and at the same time lead a normal social life and, when you do pray, tell God your desires and then place it in His hand and then put your desires in neutral and let God lead the way. God bless

I'm totally doing that.

 

[bèlla]

This isn’t directed to you @Ronit. I’ve been conversing throughout the day with a friend with marital problems. I thought I’d share my thoughts.

I would work diligently to develop a servant’s heart and understand what it means to put another’s needs above your own. I’d learn how to handle disappointment, hurt, and disagreements without becoming bitter or pointing fingers.

I would invest a lot of energy in learning how couples weathered problems in their marriage. I wouldn’t be worried about a wedding dress. I’d want to know how to handle infidelity, porn use, depression, anxiety, etc. Because those are the challenges you’re never prepared for. You get a lot of platitudes. But how do you cope with someone who won’t communicate or be intimate?

Those are the Christian books and sites worth reading. Problem-solving is an underrated skill as is composure. You’ll need a large measure for a healthy marriage. Read the marriage forum. Look at the difficulties they’re wrestling with. Many assume their lot will differ and that’s rarely the case.

And if you can’t handle the wait between singleness and the altar. How will you withstand the same in your marriage? The change you’ve been praying for that hasn’t happened. As the years pass can you maintain your hope? Or will you slip into despondency and blame?

There’s a lot of married folks walking alone. Just like you. Carrying the load on their shoulders by themselves. It’s easy to love and serve when your needs are met. Add a little neglect and ingratitude to the mix and now what?

Where’s your forgiveness and servitude? Are you recalling slights or praying and casting down the thoughts and imaginations? Everybody prepares themselves for the high points while forgetting the valleys and hardships.

You’ll have a lot. More than you realize.

~Bella

 

[Ronit]

Thank You.

 

[Ronit]

Thank You.

Very insightful. Thank you

 

[bèlla]

Very insightful. Thank you

You’re welcome. I’ve worked with several marriage ministries in the past. I contemplated becoming a counselor. But there are things I don’t want to hear.

I used to read this site. They have some good articles.

~Bella

 

[Ronit]

You’re welcome. I’ve worked with several marriage ministries in the past. I contemplated becoming a counselor. But there are things I don’t want to hear.

I used to read this site. They have some good articles.

~Bella

I understand.

 

[.Mikha'el.]

I'm well into my thirties, and the only relationships I've ever had were a couple of "romances" with women on this site. I like to think that some people find someone, and others never do. We can't force the issue on our own. We should all be open to whatever happens in life at any stage, because it's not something we can directly control.

 

[Radagast]

But I still want that man that God has for me, if indeed he has one for me.

Have you considered visiting classic car shows?

 

[Ronit]

Love Classic cars My dad has one
I love man even my chihuahua loves our 68 satellite

 

[Radagast]

Love Classic cars

You said so on another thread. That's exactly why I made the suggestion.

 

[Ronit]

1960's impalas are great too

 

[Ronit]

Actually aren't we all on Lock down????
Man I hate this the Quarentine that is

 

[Radagast]

Actually aren't we all on Lock down????

Yes, but not forever.