Safe place - Venting thread

[ChildishFears]

I AM NOT A CHRISTIAN BUT I DECIDED TO POST HERE ANYWAYS.

My vent is against THE *CONCEPT* OF AN ALL-LOVING GOD THAT SUPPOSEDLY CARES ABOUT EACH AND EVERY ONE OF US.
I get so furious when some theist say that they prayed "For a minor and curable illness to go away/To get out of a semi-difficult financial situation/Or any other rather trivial thing" And when that happens, they proclaim basically that God directly intervened in their life to help them out. And when I point out "WHY would God help you with that petty thing, and not the tens of millions of men, women and children, suffering from physical/emotional/sexual abuse, from starvation, from devastating disease, etc" Then I get bombarded with "WHY DO YOU BLAME GOD" "YOU'RE JUST A GOD HATER" "ITS ALL MAN'S FAULT" "FREE WILL BLAH BLAH BLAH" It's like, NO I'm NOT blaming your God for a damn thing (because to me at least, your God only exists as a concept), I'm just pointing out the contradiction. It doesn't make an ounce of sense to me at all. Either be consistent and say God has decidedly abandoned our world, and allows all forms of suffering to exist because of free will or ......say that 'YES God chooses to help someone get over a cold, but will allow thousands of African children to die of starvation or hundreds of Palestinians to die from air strikes'...which then would obviously tear a huge hole in the omni-benevolence defense.


Right now I'm feeling rather useless (which is a normal occurrence) but I feel more so when I sit and reflect on all the people that are suffering immense amounts of pain and there's absolutely nothing I can do about it. It makes me want to scream and destroy things (inanimate objects) and curse those responsible for the massive suffering of others. But it's such a conflicting thing because some of those people doing wrong may not completely recognize or understand the depths of what they've done. I think it was Socrates that explained if one truly understood that what they did was wrong, they wouldn't do it again. And I believe that. For instance I have both intense dislike but sympathy towards some Hamas militants particularly the younger ones. They've been raised in such a isolating and suppressing environment, they only know one way of life and if they have been pounded with a certain message over and over again, can we truly expect them to know better? That suicide bombing is a way to become a martyr and reach Heaven (WHICH BTW is a perversion of Islam, because suicide is STRICTLY prohibited in the Qur'an and the punishment for it is eternal torment--Which I think is cruel but anyways that's another story)...I mean look at the state they're living in, it's pretty much on the same lines of a concentration camp, so I can understand if the youths adhere to a radical doctrine and way of life...but whether or not they know better it's still wrong..ugh I just don't know what to think anymore.

/end vent

 

[Jo1]

How do u know everythings ok.
Im struggling guys

 

[over the rainbow]

x

 

[Ariel]

How do u know everythings ok.
Im struggling guys

I was in the deepest hell, I had to depend on my husband to help me. He found me a therapist who prescribed meds. After a week on an anti-depressant I was walking across campus when the world literally changed right in front of me. Suddenly everything was so beautiful--the trees, the birds chirping, the blue sky. Before that moment everything looked dark. I asked my husband, has it always been so beautiful. He looked at me with compassion and said, yes.

Dear Jo, there is much hardship in life, and pain and sorrow. But somewhere in your world right now it is beautiful. Find that beauty, cherish it, because this is a gift God gives us, to cherish precious moments of life when we realize that we are not alone, and that He loves us.

I am praying for you

 

[over the rainbow]

x

 

[Criada]

I wish I could cry. I'm so afraid and there's nobody to hear me. I am alone.

I hear you, sweetie
Praying for you.

 

[Jo1]

Yes I know how you feel

 

[over the rainbow]

x

 

[4hurting]

Often what we count as very little is rather a lot.
(Huh).

Lol.
What I mean is I notice your blessings Jo1 of 107,164.

Now correct me if I'm wrong, even if given out of sympathy, as opposed to caring and kindness and I'm sure there is plenty of that in there, it shows you get the attention that you need.

No, lol, ((hugs)), I'm not saying your craving nothing but attention.

Remember what I said:
Often what we count as very little is rather a lot.

Okay let me explain.

Think, well I know I've touched on this before, unless I've edited it.

Often when we get down, hurt, upset, depressed, so on, we turn inwards.
So it means we focus on ourself.

Is this selfish and non-purpose serving, perhaps, but not here to debate that one.

Point is, sometimes only think that can snap us out of it, whether short term or long term is, is, looking at someone else.

Now the trouble comes in here, trying to explain, well make clear to people reading this, not for gloating, no one jumps up and down saying yippee, throw a party cause Jo1 is as bad if not worse than me, hurrah.
NO way.
But because your bad, I feel a sense of what, sharing, empathy the right word, even if I often feel false in my mind, like I don't really care.
God does.

So in my pain, that God allows I'm able to come to you, and approach you.

Now the trouble comes in that, you should let me in more than others, cause I've been or still are there.
Trouble is, sometimes though, my motives can be wrong and I'm back on me again, anyway, that's boy girl thing, lol, duh, going slightly as usual off topic.

But seriously though.
In my statement:
Often what we count as very little is rather a lot.

We think it's over, want out, game over, never gonna go away, woe is me.
Longer that goes on, the longer we think, no good.
But I'm sure, and must be some on this forum, that smoked for say 20, 30 years, maybe only 15, but at one stage after say 10 years tried to give up.
They could not, failed every time, and they heard satan's voice:
'Stop trying, give it up, you've had a hard day today, go on, one won't hurt, it's only been a lousy 3 days, you've been longer than that before and failed, you'll never do it, you'll never amount to much, na na na.'

Thing is, all nonsense, cause a down you, means God does not get His job done.

Most of us spend more time in walking wounded wards than actually being effective for God.

This is because we are more vulnerable, men to, some men, are not gay, like me, but more soft, woman like, more, you know, sensitive and so easy target, etc.
We need physical, not taking, you know, love making sort of physical.

We want Jesus to come right now, and hug us, but not gonna happen.
Some Christian don't need this, lucky, have a partner, etc, someone gives them that, and are, though meaning well, quick to thump with bible verses, cause their in the spiritual and close to God, enough for them, on the whole, until something happens to them.

So we look for that physical from others.
Trouble is, we have a high regard for other Christians, put them higher, cause their people of God, should know better, 1 Cor 13, show me love now in Jesus name.
Let God love me through you.

But you don't go about it right, get misunderstood and bang, you get hurt.
Or you take a shine to someone being nice, your hearts all ohhhhhhh, awwwwww, and you get hurt.

With each hurt comes bitterness and oh yes that force shield, field, etc.

Sometimes though, painful as it is, can't believe gonna say this, perhaps not so sure on this bit anymore, one has to let it down, take a chance, be open, vulnerable.

My advice, (finally), lol.
Is to stop if only for 1 hour today and hey maybe you do do this, so if so make it 2 hours, not all at once, but across the day, then tomorrow 2 and half and so on, until eventually you Jo1 will be coming on and suddenly so focused on others, replying, encouraging them, uplifting them, that you are what, not focusing on yourself.

However, still take time to feed yourself, nothing wrong in that.
SICK to the back teeth now, anyone says you are this and that, meaning God, Christian, pull yourself together, things happen.
Some of us are not as mentally tough as others, deal with it (ouch) no in a nice way (phew) lol.

I really hope that helps, risking my pain in fingers to type all this, so don't you dare say no one cares or bothers.

Jo1, act, move and honour Him, by serving others with ickle bit of your time a day and watch how He honours you and I hope and pray it therefore truly helps you.
Okay.
That's from God, not me, STAY away from me, I'm okay at a distance, but keep it that way, okay, .

Blessings, Lee.

 

[loved33]

Hi childish fears
you sound like you have a very compassionate heart, you care so much...and you look at the bigger picture of why people do things rather than just judge them straight away. what you said about Socrates...Jesus said on the cross...Father forgive them...they dont know what they are doing.

All I can say is this all loving God called Jesus..I have met personally. I wish I could translate that experience to you...but I cant. One thing I will say is...you my friend are not a God hater....you care about so many of the things He cares about.

God does help me, yes even with petty things...the only way i can describe itis in an analogy.

If I wanted to adopt a child..they would have to want to be adopted too. If they decided they want to be my child..live in my house..learn my ways..be warmed by my embrace...they will naturally be in contact with all I have to offer too.

The world is full of need, Gods hand is outstretched to everyone...there is no respect of persons with him......it is love to give a person choice...God invites all for adoption..not everyone wants to come tho...its about relationship.

another more crude analogy would be...if someone told you you had a million dollars in the bank....but you never ever went to the bank and drew that money out...you receive no benefit...even tho its there for you

God is love and will not force himself on anyone...but he earnestly wants everyone to become His child thru turning to Jesus, His way to come to Him.

I know there are lots of things you said..this is your space to vent, and imm glad you shared it.Thank you. I dont proffess to in anyway have answers that you need ... but i did want to just say hi and drop a couple of lines in response to what i read

PEACE

 

[Jo1]

Yes still strugglin. Strugglin with loneliness and depression
I dont talk to anyone in my church now, not as if i did before anyway

 

[Jo1]

 

[Jo1]

Who cares anyway

 

[Jo1]

 

[Jo1]

I cod just go and throw myself off a cliff right now,but who cares

 

[Criada]

God cares, sweetie, very much.
And so do I
Praying for you.

 

[Jo1]

God cares, sweetie, very much.
And so do I
Praying for you.

Thanks sis

 

[thelost]

I posted this earlier:

Prison in my mind
I wake in the morning and look in the mirror only to see a man looking back at me that I no longer recognize. I have lived for 43 years and have never really given much thought to eternity or my own morality, until now.

I watch the news on the television and on the internet. I see the world events unfold right before my very eyes, the same world events Jesus warned us about in the bible, and I am stricken with fear and disgust within my heart. For I know that if Christ were to return this day, I would be left behind.

The bible says that God loves me and that I am the righteousness of God in Christ, I believe every word that is in the bible, except, it never pertains to me. My mind tells me daily that I was a mistake, I was never supposed to be saved. Every word that God spoke in his word was for everyone else, not me.

I wake up in the morning and I tell myself, “I’m not going to drink tonight, I’m going to read my bible and pray”. By the time I get home from work, all I can think about is having a beer. I want to be a Christian. I want it more than anything. I don’t want to be left behind.

The question that burns in my heart, why does God love everyone but me? Am I really that bad. Am I so awful of a person inside that Jesus doesn’t want me? Why can’t I just make a decision to live my life for God?
Why can’t I just believe that Jesus does love me? Why do I see myself being left behind?

I have seen God work in my life and in my families lives, I know the Lord is looking over me and my family. No matter how I feel, I always thank the Lord for his many blessings and provision.

Glory be to God forever and ever Amen!

The lost Christian
____________________


but after browsing this forum I realize how much more difficult things could be for me and my family. I guess my biggest problem is, I just can't wrap my brain around the fact that God could really truly love someone like me. And if that is the worst problem I could face, then praise Jesus!

Thelost

 

[thelost]

Thanks sis

Jo1, I don't know what your situation is, but, I have learned 1 thing through everything I have been going through. That no matter what's going on in your life, it could always be worse. I guess what I'm saying is, Thank God for the good and the bad.

Shortly after I wrote my initial post, I went in to the living room where my 11 month old grandson was crying. I picked him up and he looked right in to my eyes and stopped crying. And that's when I realized how much worse my life could be.

God loves you! and like he said to the apostle Paul, "My grace is sufficient for you".

I hope you find some wisdom in what I'm saying, I have been thinking about my initial post and how stupid it is. Please, just think about what I'm saying. You are loved by the most powerful force in the universe. What more could we need.

Take care dear, I'll be praying for you as well as myself and all the others I've read about on this forum.

God Bless!

Thelost

 

[Criada]

((((((Thelost))))))
I know this thread isn't for advice... but, I really think you should change that name.. you are not lost, brother, you are safe in God's arms, and He will never leave you or forsake you, however bad things feel