LOL(big sarcasm on the LOL)....Since I have both worked full time as a mother (with travel the 1st 6 months of my daughter's life), AND been at home full time (the past 10 years). I can tell you that I found it easier to work, then come home to her mentally and physically. There are no lunch breaks or work breaks worked into full-time mommying. In fact, here are some of the things that a person gets to do when they work, that you do NOT get to do as a full-time parent:
- Talk on the phone withouth "mommymommymommymommy" droning in the backgournd. This happens EVERYTIME THE PHONE RINGS until your kids turn 20.
- Write your to-do list, fill in your calandar, or plan your work-day without a child asking if they can color on your planning, or can have a paper and pencil too, or you make a list for them of things to keep them busy so you can get your stuff done.
- Go to the bathroom with the door closed, rather than keeping it open in case of toddler emergencies (which always happen at that moment).
- Go to the bathroom...period....rather than holding it for the next 15 minutes while you encourage your child who is in potty training to just relax and see if it will come out. Or hold it while you remind your grade school child to come back and flush and wash their hands.
- Squeeze in a quick workout or walk over the lunch break, rather than making lunch, feeding lunch, eating the leftoveres and cleaning up the lunch....then planning supper.
- I also used to balance my checkbook and do my bills over my lunch break, eating a sandwich while I did, then file the papers when I arrived home. Try to write out a check accurately when your kids are demanding your attention.
- Take time off from work for dentist, doctor, and OB visits. Without your 2 year old daughter in tow...for instance, standing behind the OB saying, "Mommy, you have lots of little strings where you go pee and babies come out (our son was in utero, and I couldn't find a sitter for the girls on my prenatal exam day)."
- Take off a sick day and go home to bed while your kids are at day care....rather than pouring cough medicine, aspirin and coffee into you to get through being sick, while you care for the kids who were either sick last week, or will be by next week.
- Take the majority of your clothes to the dry-cleaners for pressing and dry-cleaning....it helps professional clothing look better and last, and that is part of what you get paid for right? But if you ar eat home, you buy everything wash and wear (I miss silk very much, thank you), and wash nearly 10 loads of laundry a week for a family of 5. Most of that would still be there, but about a load of my own clothing would be washed by someone else.
- Having a grown up conversation with a grown up about inspiring work strategies, grown up jokes and grown-up issues....like what is happening in the world. VS.....BARNEY IS A DINASAUR IN OUR IMAGINATION lalalalalala for the 100thgazillionth time.
- You have a post-supper tidy routine, tidy again before you go to work in the morning, and arrive home to your home STILL CLEAN!!!!!! You're weekly house cleaining is to clean up after supper....throw in a load of laundry in, fold the last one, go to bed. Dust and vac and scrub on Saturday. Hubbys often split chores when wives work. When you stay at home, what happens in one Saturday for the working person happens EVERYDAY for the stay at home person because people make messes all the time, and people are there all the time. When your kids go to daycare....they clean up the messes your kids made all day.
- When you work, your car also stays cleaner....same reasons as above.
- When you work, you don't pull every muscle in your lower back and between your shoulder blades by carrying around kids on your hip or nursing them all day.
- When you work, and your kids wake at night, you share the duties with your spouse, because you are both working....when you stay at home, it's your job to get up so you spouse can get to work the next day, because you can sit, eat bonbons and recover later.
- When you work, you can run to the grocery store, run errands, get the gas tank filled, etc. on the way to the day care provider. All of that is slower, or has to be done late evening, when you are at home with kids. PLUS you have more grocery shopping to do because you cook more meals.
Simply...when I worked and my daughter was an infant, I was more intellectually stimulated by adults, had more sleep, less cleaning, shopping, cooking and errands to do and had less distractions.
As for what I do during the day? Same thing as a day care provider, only with more intensity and dedication to my childrens health, nutrition, education, morals, values, faith and developement of their abililites and talents, because I am the parent. I also try to make sure all is ready for my spouse when he gets home, so he has a place of solace after a busy day, dinner with his family so he feels connected to us and a chance to unwind. I also do many things we would hire out for otherewise, because I am at home (like all the window screens-sills-bases, I keep a large garden, and I don't have any dry-cleanable clothes) and it saves money. We often make gifts, rather than buy them to save money, and we live by a stricter budget, which means less eating out and more work at home.
Next time someone says something so naive

....send them to this post. I've done both, and I know the difference. AND if they wonder why stay at home with all of that work, well, then they just don't get the idea about how effective we can be when we are the ultimate day-care profider, custom matched to the needs of our kids.
Like I've always said, I can always work, but I can't always have a chance raise my kids hands on like I do when they are young.