Re-Marriage and Divorce

[PrettyboyAndy]

Hello friends,

A close friend of ours, recently got saved. She brought up many verses with us, and has a very different view then we do, I would like some feedback from my fellow Saints.

Is a Christian allowed to Divorce, if so on what grounds?

Is a Christian allowed to Re-Marry, if so on what grounds?

 

[DominicBaptiste]

Hello friends,

A close friend of ours, recently got saved. She brought up many verses with us, and has a very different view then we do, I would like some feedback from my fellow Saints.

Is a Christian allowed to Divorce, if so on what grounds?

Is a Christian allowed to Re-Marry, if so on what grounds?

I think the traditional view is that you're married until your spouse dies. I kind of like that view, but in reality, most people don't follow it. I have one great grandmother who was married four times, and she had one son with each of the first three husbands, and they all have children and grandchildren. It would makes things easier to say, "one marriage only until death do them part," but as I just described, it often doesn't happen that way. One of my sisters is about to get married for the second time, and I don't particularly like it, even though I am happy that she has found someone to be with. It seems unfair to her first husband, and it also makes me think that she thinks of her husbands as disposable assets, which is terrible. But, I always try to think back to my great grandmother, and when you know that whole families are in existence because of the multiple marriages of ancestors, and it makes it hard to be cruel to people in the present moment who are getting remarried.

 

[r4.h]

Hello friends,

A close friend of ours, recently got saved. She brought up many verses with us, and has a very different view then we do, I would like some feedback from my fellow Saints.

Is a Christian allowed to Divorce, if so on what grounds?

Is a Christian allowed to Re-Marry, if so on what grounds?

Math 5:32 and Math 19:9, 1 Cor 7:15 and Duet 24:1-4 are the verses said to condone divorce and therefore remarriage on the grounds of unfaithfulness, including desertion, which is unfaithfulness also.

Mk 10:12, Lk 16:18, 1 Cor 7:10+11 and 39, Rom 7:1+2 and Mal 2:14+16 go against those above and i could add 1 Cor 7:16 which seems to place the salvation of deserting unbeliever in the hands of the believer.

The rule of interpretation is that unclear verses are used to get right understanding of the unclear.
That in mind we need ask what did Jesus intend with the exception clause in Mathew?

At this point in my understanding I do not believe a Christian would divorce, so remarriage is also out.

The question is not "CAN" a Christian do such and such? but "WOULD" a Christ filled believer do it?

By the way, what were this new believers view, often new converts are the "like a little child" Jesus spoke of, they just believe the father, and havnt been corrupted.

 

[sdowney717]

Romans 7
Or do you not know, brethren (for I speak to those who know the law), that the law has dominion over a man as long as he lives? 2 For the woman who has a husband is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies, she is released from the law of her husband. 3 So then if, while her husband lives, she marries another man, she will be called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from that law, so that she is no adulteress, though she has married another man.

1 Corinthians 7
10 Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. 11 But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife.

So clearly Christs command is to not remarry after divorcing, unless the married partner dies, then you are free to remarry with God's approval. If you try to change this by reading into other verses what conflicts with these, then your twisting scripture to accommodate your flesh and passions. Paul says as does Christ they commit adultery who remarry if the original spouse still lives.

 

[sdowney717]

Matthew 5, does not approve a remarriage. But does authorize divorce for sexual immorality. Divorce does not mean your free to marry again.

32 But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.

Again Paul teaches, the only acceptable reason for another marriage is death of the spouse.
1 Corinthians 7
39 A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.

This here people use to justify another marriage if there exists a living former spouse, but its twisting scriptures by saying the believing spouse is not under bondage in this case where the unbeliever departs. Not under bondage is not referring to the original marriage's falling apart allowing for another marriage, Paul is authorizing a peaceful separation, they are not under an emotional bondage to reconcile with the departing spouse. AND Paul moves on to say you may save your HUSBAND OR WIFE in such cases, Paul still calls them husband and wife!

1 Corinthians 7
12 But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. 13 And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy.

15 But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace. 16 For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?

 

[Thomas1987]

Can't divorce , can marry again when your second half die .

 

[Francis Drake]

Goodness me, what a jumble of ideas here.
My Christian wife of 29 years had an affair, was forgiven by me, and then a couple of years later, she walked out on me anyway.

After I had forgiven her, the Lord twice revealed her breach of promise to avoid contacting him. When she suddenly left, it turned out she had already signed a lease on a flat and had furnished it behind my back.

I spent a full year praying for restoration before the Lord finally told me she would never come back and I should to let her go.

The Lord then led a lovely woman to me and I remarried 11 years ago, and are now exceedingly happy.

Those who deny remarriage really don't understand the mercy and compassion of the Lord,especially to those who are victims.​

 

[nonaeroterraqueous]

Goodness me, what a jumble of ideas here.
My Christian wife of 29 years had an affair, was forgiven by me, and then a couple of years later, she walked out on me anyway.

It's not a jumble of ideas. In no case is anyone bound to remain married to an unfaithful spouse. In fact, I would not suggest even trying, because of the sexual impurity you heap upon yourself in the process.

Those who deny remarriage really don't understand the mercy and compassion of the Lord,especially to those who are victims.

That's an overly broad statement, mischaracterizing all that has been said, here. Most cases of divorce and remarriage are the result of "falling out of love." In that case, the motivation for divorcing and remarrying is no different than the motivation for committing adultery without divorce and remarriage. The only difference is in wanting to feel legally justified in doing so. People forget that an artificial legal system does not supersede the laws of God. The human laws may allow it, but the oath taken before God will always be enforced in the end, and it should be taken with the utmost importance.

 

[sdowney717]

Scripture is not a jumble of ideas, it is coherent truth which some simply don't like parts of.
Hearing from God is subjective, how can anyone else know you heard personally from God, but scripture is objective truth, something you can prove true.
If someone hears something from god, that disagrees with what God says, then they did not hear from God.
Try to prove God and Christ and Paul approved of another marriage when the spouse is still living from scripture.

For example, nothing here about Christ approving remarriage with a living spouse, just the opposite.
v10, shocked the disciples so much they said better to never marry at all!, seeing the Lord's command was so rigid.
v9, the exception clause, does not permit another marriage, just provides the ok to divorce.
The 'and' clause is also unambiguous, he commits adultery who marries a divorced for any reason woman, and this scripture is in complete agreement with what Paul teaches.

Matthew 19:9-11 New King James Version (NKJV)
9 And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.”

10 His disciples said to Him, “If such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry.”

Jesus Teaches on Celibacy
11 But He said to them, “All cannot accept this saying, but only those to whom it has been given:

 

[bling]

There are several things here that need to be addressed:

1. Christ is talking to Jews while they are still under the Jewish written Law and not the Christian Law written on our hearts.
2. Christ says they are divorced and does not say those that “think they are divorced”.
3. Christ also says they are married even though it causes adultery and means they are adulterous and not those that think they have married.
4. Under the old Law these adulterers should be stoned and from the reaction of the disciples that sounds like what they thought would happen when the Kingdom was established.
5. One problem is with the definition of words, especially: marriage, divorce, and adultery. It seem God in all His wisdom has allowed societies throughout the world and time to define marriage. Divorce seems to be the dissolving of a covenant relationship and an adulterous is anyone involved in the damaging of a covenant relationship.

Before going around telling people they are going to hell if they stay in their existing relationship you might want to study Biblical definitions and you might want to think about what would be the most Godly type Loving reaction. Did David deserve to continue living with Bathsheba?

 

[PrettyboyAndy]

It's not a jumble of ideas. In no case is anyone bound to remain married to an unfaithful spouse. In fact, I would not suggest even trying, because of the sexual impurity you heap upon yourself in the process.



That's an overly broad statement, mischaracterizing all that has been said, here. Most cases of divorce and remarriage are the result of "falling out of love." In that case, the motivation for divorcing and remarrying is no different than the motivation for committing adultery without divorce and remarriage. The only difference is in wanting to feel legally justified in doing so. People forget that an artificial legal system does not supersede the laws of God. The human laws may allow it, but the oath taken before God will always be enforced in the end, and it should be taken with the utmost importance.

Matthew 5, does not approve a remarriage. But does authorize divorce for sexual immorality. Divorce does not mean your free to marry again.

32 But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.

Again Paul teaches, the only acceptable reason for another marriage is death of the spouse.
1 Corinthians 7
39 A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.

This here people use to justify another marriage if there exists a living former spouse, but its twisting scriptures by saying the believing spouse is not under bondage in this case where the unbeliever departs. Not under bondage is not referring to the original marriage's falling apart allowing for another marriage, Paul is authorizing a peaceful separation, they are not under an emotional bondage to reconcile with the departing spouse. AND Paul moves on to say you may save your HUSBAND OR WIFE in such cases, Paul still calls them husband and wife!

1 Corinthians 7
12 But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. 13 And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy.

15 But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace. 16 For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?

Very nice posts:

To use an example:

Let's say, someone after being cheated on and divorces, does Re-Marry.

Would that not be a forgivable sin?

If God hates divorce, would he want that person to divorce again, to fix the initial divorce?

 

[PrettyboyAndy]

There are several things here that need to be addressed:

1. Christ is talking to Jews while they are still under the Jewish written Law and not the Christian Law written on our hearts.
2. Christ says they are divorced and does not say those that “think they are divorced”.
3. Christ also says they are married even though it causes adultery and means they are adulterous and not those that think they have married.
4. Under the old Law these adulterers should be stoned and from the reaction of the disciples that sounds like what they thought would happen when the Kingdom was established.
5. One problem is with the definition of words, especially: marriage, divorce, and adultery. It seem God in all His wisdom has allowed societies throughout the world and time to define marriage. Divorce seems to be the dissolving of a covenant relationship and an adulterous is anyone involved in the damaging of a covenant relationship.

Before going around telling people they are going to hell if they stay in their existing relationship you might want to study Biblical definitions and you might want to think about what would be the most Godly type Loving reaction. Did David deserve to continue living with Bathsheba?

Nice post.

I think if we find the original Greek words, and see what they mean, we can better understand this text.

This looks like an informative article.

WHAT WAS JESUS' EXCEPTION, EXCEPT it is for FORNICATION?

 

[sdowney717]

Very nice posts:

To use an example:

Let's say, someone after being cheated on and divorces, does Re-Marry.

Would that not be a forgivable sin?

If God hates divorce, would he want that person to divorce again, to fix the initial divorce?

The warning is we do not want to be called an adulterer, which is what Christ said we are if we do that.
However I will let God judge them that do this, and I am in no position to officiate any remarriages. I wont even try to understand how this affects a person's eternal rewards, since I cannot know, I just know it was spoken against strongly by Jesus and the apostles..

Romans 7
So then if, while her husband lives, she marries another man, she will be called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from that law, so that she is no adulteress, though she has married another man.

The end time days of the church at the end of the end of days, at the end of this age will be terrible times, and lots of demonic deceptions abounding.