Parenting for a child with ADD/Aspergers

[Geoffc64]

Hi Folks, I'm hoping for a little help here.
I've got a 9 year old (nearly 10) who was diagnosed about a year ago with ADHD, but now they're thinking it might be Aspergers. Can anyone give anysuggestions regarding disciplining him as well as how to get him to follow "normal" instructions (eg, go and have a shower) without getting melt-downs?
Thanks,
Geoff

 

[jackmt]

Hi Folks, I'm hoping for a little help here.
I've got a 9 year old (nearly 10) who was diagnosed about a year ago with ADHD, but now they're thinking it might be Aspergers. Can anyone give anysuggestions regarding disciplining him as well as how to get him to follow "normal" instructions (eg, go and have a shower) without getting melt-downs?
Thanks,
Geoff

Discipline never worked on me. I needed to know why doing a thing was good, right, necessary, etc. Then I was able to do it. Reason, rewards and withholding of rewards, I think, would be a better tack than punishment. Punishment always made me dig my heels in.

Also, I have always had a strong aversion to water. I believe this is not uncommon with Aspies. And we Aspies hate transitions. But once I got into the shower, I didn't want to come out. I'd like to hear what other Aspies have to say on the matter.

 

[Intellectual-Christian]

Hi Folks, I'm hoping for a little help here.
I've got a 9 year old (nearly 10) who was diagnosed about a year ago with ADHD, but now they're thinking it might be Aspergers. Can anyone give anysuggestions regarding disciplining him as well as how to get him to follow "normal" instructions (eg, go and have a shower) without getting melt-downs?
Thanks,
Geoff

Hi Geoff,

I haven't been on this forum as often as I would like to be, so I just saw your post. I actually wrote a blog post on a similar topic a few weeks ago. (I can't post links yet, but if you click at the link in my signature, you'll find it. The post entitled something like 10 things every parent should know about raising a child with Asperger's Syndrome.) I think what jackmt is correct, but I would add that prevention is far more powerful than cure. Especially if he has sensory sensitivities (loud noise, bright light, touch, etc.), a lot of behavioral issues can largely be prevented by controlling his environment.

I hope this helps a little. I've got a few more ideas parents have found helpful on my blog, so you might want to check it out in addition to a lot of what others on the spectrum out there are writing.

 

[jackmt]

Hi Geoff,

I haven't been on this forum as often as I would like to be, so I just saw your post. I actually wrote a blog post on a similar topic a few weeks ago. (I can't post links yet, but if you click at the link in my signature, you'll find it. The post entitled something like 10 things every parent should know about raising a child with Asperger's Syndrome.) I think what jackmt is correct, but I would add that prevention is far more powerful than cure. Especially if he has sensory sensitivities (loud noise, bright light, touch, etc.), a lot of behavioral issues can largely be prevented by controlling his environment.

I hope this helps a little. I've got a few more ideas parents have found helpful on my blog, so you might want to check it out in addition to a lot of what others on the spectrum out there are writing.

Exactly right about prevention, but sensory issues do not always show themselves clearly to be such. I use a heavy pillow (Memory Foam) as a weight on my head/face to 'reset' my senses at least 3 times a day for 15 min. Some specialists recommend every 2 hrs. for at least 10 min. Others use weighted blankets or jackets. I sometimes use a bean bag on my chest weighted down with my arms. whatever is available; the weight is the important thing.

Also magnesium supplements help with sensory issues; sound especially for me. My dog calms me down, too. All these things are known to be helpful with those on the spectrum.

Have you read Tony Attwood's Complete guide to Asperger's Syndrome? Best book on the market in my opinion. Also, watch Temple Grandin and especially her comments on the movie. But watch the movie first.

Hope this helps.

 

[HiddenBlessings]

If you have decent insurance, you can take your child to see a behaviorist. That is what I am doing with my low-functioning 6 year old boy Joshua. They are going over discipline with me. Let me know if you have insurance and how it works out!