Loving Your Enemies

[Beanieboy]

I understand that I am to love my enemies, to return curse with blessing, to pray for my enemies, to forgive them, to turn the other cheek.

In fact, my enemies are the only ones fighting a one sided war. I decided to just not react, but it's gone on for months, now, and everyone has a limit. I'm at a loss at the moment because my emotions are a bit raw due to the death of my mother, and now I'm at a point where I metaphorically want to put some nails in bat and start swinging.

So, I've prayed about it, admitted to God I don't have a love for my neighbor that can endure psychological abuse this has been having on me. It has lead to suicidal ideation. I went on antidepressants which helped, and I'm angry now.

So, I'm at a loss of how to move forward.

 

[xaris]

Love isn't always the gushy-mushy sentimentality stuff. It also confronts, convicts and tells the truth.
(Heb 12:1-12)

 

[Devin Hammond]

Powerful Prayers for complete protection from enemies by Evangelist Gabriel Fernandes

Prayer For Enemies | Prayers For Your Enemies

A Prayer For Protection Against Evil Plans | Be Covered By God's Grace

 

[Arc F1]

I understand that I am to love my enemies, to return curse with blessing, to pray for my enemies, to forgive them, to turn the other cheek.

In fact, my enemies are the only ones fighting a one sided war. I decided to just not react, but it's gone on for months, now, and everyone has a limit. I'm at a loss at the moment because my emotions are a bit raw due to the death of my mother, and now I'm at a point where I metaphorically want to put some nails in bat and start swinging.

So, I've prayed about it, admitted to God I don't have a love for my neighbor that can endure psychological abuse this has been having on me. It has lead to suicidal ideation. I went on antidepressants which helped, and I'm angry now.

So, I'm at a loss of how to move forward.

You aren't alone. That is the one thing I struggle with the most. What I do is think about how if I don't forgive I won't be forgiven. Making it to heaven is my number one goal. This verse usually brings me back to where I need to be.

For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you.

 

[Sketcher]

I understand that I am to love my enemies, to return curse with blessing, to pray for my enemies, to forgive them, to turn the other cheek.

In fact, my enemies are the only ones fighting a one sided war. I decided to just not react, but it's gone on for months, now, and everyone has a limit. I'm at a loss at the moment because my emotions are a bit raw due to the death of my mother, and now I'm at a point where I metaphorically want to put some nails in bat and start swinging.

So, I've prayed about it, admitted to God I don't have a love for my neighbor that can endure psychological abuse this has been having on me. It has lead to suicidal ideation. I went on antidepressants which helped, and I'm angry now.

So, I'm at a loss of how to move forward.

Out of curiosity, how are they getting at you?

 

[Beanieboy]

Over the top surveilance that violates privacy.

 

[Beanieboy]

Love isn't always the gushy-mushy sentimentality stuff. It also confronts, convicts and tells the truth.
(Heb 12:1-12)

What is mushy gushy about always being on the receiving end of gossip, oversurveilance, and trying to take the high road?

 

[xaris]

What is mushy gushy about always being on the receiving end of gossip, oversurveilance, and trying to take the high road?

I was referring to the fact that love will sometimes confront. IOW, it's not unloving to confront those things.

 

[ValleyGal]

Your neighbour has cameras on your house? For the purpose of watching you or are they simply aimed in your direction because they have lots of cameras to protect their own home? If they are doing it in order to watch you, that is a violation of privacy and you can file a complaint to their landlord if they rent, or to the City if they own. If they are within their rights legally, then there is only one thing you can do - change what you can. What are some things you do have control over? Closing the blinds, put in some very tall cedars, move... come up with a list and choose the best option.

I would also suggest looking into boundaries. There are a lot of good books on the subject, including by Cloud and Townsend. It's about not changing anyone else, but taking responsibility for our own selves, including your own feelings. If their watching you is not illegal, then rather than getting angry or resentful, figure out what you can control, and then do it, so you don't fall into bad feelings and blaming them for it. The flip side of boundaries is that it also frees others to take responsibility for themselves though logical consequences. In your situation, if your neighbour is watching you illegally, the consequence is that they will be charged. If they are doing it legally, the logical outcome is a neighbour who is less than willing to be helpful if they ever need anything.

Loving your neighbour isn't about calling them out on their bad behaviour, but about what is in their best interest. It is not in their best interest for you to be resentful towards them, or to allow them to spy on you, break the law, etc. How to deal with this in the most loving way? Natural and logical consequences.

 

[Unqualified]

Grieve your mum that should help the anger. Can you ignore them and be non confrontational. Maybe it’s a reaction to something you said, so you would have to endure the consequences. What about passive resistance. Be yourself do your thing and to heck with the neighbor in a sweet way. Don’t let them hang you up.

 

[SANTOSO]

I understand that I am to love my enemies, to return curse with blessing, to pray for my enemies, to forgive them, to turn the other cheek.

In fact, my enemies are the only ones fighting a one sided war. I decided to just not react, but it's gone on for months, now, and everyone has a limit. I'm at a loss at the moment because my emotions are a bit raw due to the death of my mother, and now I'm at a point where I metaphorically want to put some nails in bat and start swinging.

So, I've prayed about it, admitted to God I don't have a love for my neighbor that can endure psychological abuse this has been having on me. It has lead to suicidal ideation. I went on antidepressants which helped, and I'm angry now.

So, I'm at a loss of how to move forward.

Hello Beanieboy,

When you are angry ! Are you not suffering ?
You are suffering because you are hurt or offended by what your enemies have said and done or even look !

The question you need to ask yourself truthfully: are you suffering for what is right or what is wrong ?

If you suffer for what is wrong, repent and come back to the Lord’s side.

If you suffer for what is right, you are suffering for righteousness’s sake or Christ’s sake.

It can be said that when you are suffering for what is right, you are taking the cross.

If you felt this cross to much to bear with, then you need to consider what Jesus have offered :
Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. -Matthew 11:29

When you take Jesus’ yoke, you know that this suffering that you bear — the Lord bear with you !

That is why we have heard:
Blessed be the Lord, who daily bears us up; God is our salvation. Selah -Psalms 68:19

What do the Lord bear up daily? Yes, it is our burden !

Are you not convinced? Hear what the Lord have said :

"If the world hates you,
KNOW THAT it has hated Me before it hated you. -John 15:18

Do your enemies not hate you ?

Therefore, consider this :
and if children, then heirs'heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him. -Romans 8:17

Remember that you are God’s child, provided that you suffer with Christ that you may also be glorified with Him.

If you want to love your enemies, you must know you must first love God ; without you loving God by submitting to His will, it is impossible for you to love your enemies.

Only those who are born of God born of love and begets love !

If you want to bless those who curse you, you know that you need to earn your blessings from God before you can bless others. For how you can bless others what you have not received.
For this is what we have heard:
All the paths of the LORD are steadfast love and faithfulness, for those who keep his covenant and his testimonies. -Psalms 25:10

If you want to pray for your enemies, you know that requires strength! You know that you don’t have that strength! Have you not tried and failed miserably? Go to the Lord ! For He gives strength to His people!

Have you not heard what David have said :

Blessed be the LORD! For he has heard the voice of my pleas for mercy. -Psalms 28:6
The LORD is my strength and my shield; in him my heart trusts, and I am helped; my heart exults, and with my song I give thanks to him. -Psalms 28:7
The LORD is the strength of his people; he is the saving refuge of his anointed. -Psalms 28:8
Oh, save your people and bless your heritage! Be their shepherd and carry them forever. -Psalms 28:9

Have you learned from David ? Despite his suffering, what he prays in Psalm 28. Are you stronger than David ? Are your enemies like David’s enemies? Learn how the Holy Spirit lead him to pray aright and seek God’s strength to save him from his enemies.

Learn from his spiritual experience on how he moves forward! Then you can move forward!

 

[John Helpher]

So, I'm at a loss of how to move forward.

Hey Bb. Sorry for your loss. It sounds like you're in a pretty emotional place right now. It's okay to feel sad about your loss and I agree with others that you should take some time to properly mourn your mother's death.

It's tricky because the best way to deal with enemy loving is to approach the situation rationally. Often we make enemies of people who do not intend to be our enemy, but rather just do some annoying or hurtful thing without realizing how it affects others. I was listening to a rock song on youtube recently and down in the comments a fan posted, "When I listen to this band, my neighbors listen, too". Maybe it was just a joke, but there tends to be truth in jest. He probably does crank up the volume on the music he likes and perhaps it bothers the neighbors but in his mind he either doesn't care or thinks he's doing them a favor. Is he their enemy, or just an obnoxious neighbor who's too immature to understand what he's doing?

You're in an emotional place right now so it may be difficult for you to separate your emotions from a rational approach toward these people who are bothering you. Frankly, I'm always a little bit wary of people who complain about being spied on (especially people on meds while also dealing with emotional trauma), because usually it is an issue of paranoia.

It's difficult to give accurate advice without specific information. If you're interested, I posted a video about enemy loving a couple weeks ago over on this thread.

Good luck.