hello, I am starting to go a little crazy. Here's my problem. About 5 years ago I became a christian, got babtized and love the lord. I want to follow him with all my heart, please him, and do his will. The only problem is, I am strugling with feelings for men, I know, Its not right. I am trying to surpress these feelings, because this is not what God intended for us. Its so hard, I feel like a looser, like I am not perfect, not able to be one of God's children. I've prayed for so long for God to release me of this, but It doesn't work. I am 25 now, and tired, dont know what to do, how do I solve this? The only thing I want is to find a woman and settle down, and be a follower of Jesus. I love God so much, but cant face him, because I fail over and over again, and keep slipping back into the same sin. I've never acted on it, I mean, I never went out with a guy or did anything. Nobody even knows, and thats the hardest thing, its a big masquerade. Is there any one out there who can help me, or has experiance with this, or knows someone who can help me, PLEASE HELP ME! I am desperate! Thanks.....
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Lost in this world
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kelco
Rev. Kelco
hey humanbeing. Remember what Paul says we all fall short of the glory of God. What you are struggling with is common to us all. Where does it say in the bible that longing to settle down and have a family is wrong? The thing of it is that God's time is not our time. While I don't have a solution for you, I know one thing that you can do while you wait, pray! The more you pray the closer you get with God and having a good, solid relationship with Him will make the waiting better and prepare you for that time when that someone special comes along.
God Bless
God Bless
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blerg1234
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Don't be afraid to really seek God about the problem!
The best thing is that God understands that we ALL struggle, and while we can feel as though we have no right to come to God, He WANTS to be there for us.
The BEST thing you can do is pray about it and really seek God. Position yourself for change!
The best thing is that God understands that we ALL struggle, and while we can feel as though we have no right to come to God, He WANTS to be there for us.
The BEST thing you can do is pray about it and really seek God. Position yourself for change!
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Saviot'Valuan
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http://www.settingcaptivesfree.com/home/
try this, I hear it can get you on the right path. I've heard stories that 'truly' gay men and women have realigned their life through this.
try this, I hear it can get you on the right path. I've heard stories that 'truly' gay men and women have realigned their life through this.
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W
Wakeup2god
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Dear friend, what we all desire is love. Unfortunatley somewhere along the road of your life the counterfeit has slipped in. There is nothing wrong with feeling love for another man, woman, whoever. We mustn't confuse that with lust though.
I'm sure that those who are married will tell you that their partner can't provide that perfect love, only God can. We are lied to by the world that we need a partner to make us complete. We don't. We need God to make us complete, a partner is an addition, a blessing to us. God knows your thoughts, He knows the root of them as well. Here's an analogy for you. When a car breaks we consult the maker. Somethings out of tune with you. We all have our own problems. A missfiring piston can be as bad as a broken headlamp or a flat tyre. The missfiring will affect your day to day running. A broken headlamp affects you in the darkness, it can make you a danger or put you in danger. A flat tyre can stop you moving. None are worse than the next but they all need dealing with before they cause more trouble. Now if we go to a dodgy back street dealer he may sell us conterfeit parts that seem to fix the problem but they soon break and cause more damage. Go to the original creator.
Seek the real deal and not the counterfeit. God has a plan for you.
I'm sure that those who are married will tell you that their partner can't provide that perfect love, only God can. We are lied to by the world that we need a partner to make us complete. We don't. We need God to make us complete, a partner is an addition, a blessing to us. God knows your thoughts, He knows the root of them as well. Here's an analogy for you. When a car breaks we consult the maker. Somethings out of tune with you. We all have our own problems. A missfiring piston can be as bad as a broken headlamp or a flat tyre. The missfiring will affect your day to day running. A broken headlamp affects you in the darkness, it can make you a danger or put you in danger. A flat tyre can stop you moving. None are worse than the next but they all need dealing with before they cause more trouble. Now if we go to a dodgy back street dealer he may sell us conterfeit parts that seem to fix the problem but they soon break and cause more damage. Go to the original creator.
Seek the real deal and not the counterfeit. God has a plan for you.
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Cristiano
Regular Member
Humanbeing,
Hello. I wanted to let you know that I am in the same situation...really. I am about your age and have had to deal with this issue for most of my life, although college really got me realizing that I was checking out all the guys on campus rather than all the girls my freshman year
. I am not a feminine man and fit fairly well into "heterosexual society". Still, it is extremely hard, with feelings of isolation and that no one will ever understand you because you can't tell anyone about your desires for another person of the same sex. I sometimes think, "Wow, if I didn't have Christ, I may have committed suicide by now or been down a really WRONG track." Even though others can give you encouragement on these forums, for example, and tell you to pray and keep the faith, they really do not know what it is like to struggle with homosexual sin unless they too struggle with it. That is why I was so happy to see your post.
Even though sin is sin when compared to the Lord's perfection, struggling with homosexual desires as a christian here on earth, in my opinion, is a lot worse than struggling with other sins. It is really a sin that you cannot talk to other christians about (except a pastor, for example, which is still almost unbearable to do), whereas if someone is struggling with alcoholism or drug addiction, it somehow doesn't seem as taboo to me as struggling with same-sex desires, socially speaking.
We live in a Christian world that has made homosexual desires extreme outliers in the Christian walk, when I would argue that many people have or have had "feelings" toward someone of the same sex. We somehow as a body of believers, have labeled that an "extreme, uncommon" sin, rather than making it a natural part of being a human. I think it is because those men who actually have had a same sex desire want to overcompensate by preaching hatred. With that being said, my encouragement to you as a fellow brother in Christ that is struggling with the same sin is this:
1) Christ experienced EVERYTHING of the sinful nature and yet did not sin. That means He experienced same-sex feelings at some point in His 33 years on this earth, whether it was when he hit puberty or when he was dying on the cross. To me that is amazing. He knows EXACTLY what it feels like to never feel like you will ever find "love" with another human being. He knows EXACTLY what it feels like to feel out of place. He knows EXACTLY what it is like to want a family but at the same time want the love from someone of the same sex and wondering if you can find a woman that will really be attractive to you. He knows EXACTLY how YOU feel. Take comfort in that.
2) Paul gives us insight as to how we should face such "aspects" of our lives. I love this verse, 2 Corinthians 12:7-11: "To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weakenesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." The point is, we can pray all we want, but it may be the Lord's will that we bear this particular burden our whole lives that he might be glorified through it, and it may be that we have it for a time and then he removes it when we are ready. It's his choice, according to his will. I will refrain from quoting the suffering passages by Paul.
I have contemplated this a lot my brother, and some encouragement comes from knowing that my witness in the world has been more effective because of my thorn. In college, I was not involved in love relationships, so I was always able to give my "all" to my friends and love them as Christ loved us, offering all of myself. As a result, I have formed awesome relationships over the past several years and have had many opportunities to share God's love and his Gospel with non-believers, that I probably never would've had if I had been involved with "significant others" who took up my time.
It is horrible to think we may spend life "alone", but amazing to think that if we keep our eyes on Jesus, we will be satisfied. Just like the song says, he is "more than enough". Period. That means in any situation. Remember that the sufferings on earth will never compare to the glory that awaits us in heaven. Bro, I would love to hear from you, as I have never told this same problem to anyone before now either. It would be encouraging to know that there is someone else out there who feels like I do. May God bless you
Hello. I wanted to let you know that I am in the same situation...really. I am about your age and have had to deal with this issue for most of my life, although college really got me realizing that I was checking out all the guys on campus rather than all the girls my freshman year
. I am not a feminine man and fit fairly well into "heterosexual society". Still, it is extremely hard, with feelings of isolation and that no one will ever understand you because you can't tell anyone about your desires for another person of the same sex. I sometimes think, "Wow, if I didn't have Christ, I may have committed suicide by now or been down a really WRONG track." Even though others can give you encouragement on these forums, for example, and tell you to pray and keep the faith, they really do not know what it is like to struggle with homosexual sin unless they too struggle with it. That is why I was so happy to see your post.Even though sin is sin when compared to the Lord's perfection, struggling with homosexual desires as a christian here on earth, in my opinion, is a lot worse than struggling with other sins. It is really a sin that you cannot talk to other christians about (except a pastor, for example, which is still almost unbearable to do), whereas if someone is struggling with alcoholism or drug addiction, it somehow doesn't seem as taboo to me as struggling with same-sex desires, socially speaking.
We live in a Christian world that has made homosexual desires extreme outliers in the Christian walk, when I would argue that many people have or have had "feelings" toward someone of the same sex. We somehow as a body of believers, have labeled that an "extreme, uncommon" sin, rather than making it a natural part of being a human. I think it is because those men who actually have had a same sex desire want to overcompensate by preaching hatred. With that being said, my encouragement to you as a fellow brother in Christ that is struggling with the same sin is this:
1) Christ experienced EVERYTHING of the sinful nature and yet did not sin. That means He experienced same-sex feelings at some point in His 33 years on this earth, whether it was when he hit puberty or when he was dying on the cross. To me that is amazing. He knows EXACTLY what it feels like to never feel like you will ever find "love" with another human being. He knows EXACTLY what it feels like to feel out of place. He knows EXACTLY what it is like to want a family but at the same time want the love from someone of the same sex and wondering if you can find a woman that will really be attractive to you. He knows EXACTLY how YOU feel. Take comfort in that.
2) Paul gives us insight as to how we should face such "aspects" of our lives. I love this verse, 2 Corinthians 12:7-11: "To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weakenesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." The point is, we can pray all we want, but it may be the Lord's will that we bear this particular burden our whole lives that he might be glorified through it, and it may be that we have it for a time and then he removes it when we are ready. It's his choice, according to his will. I will refrain from quoting the suffering passages by Paul.
I have contemplated this a lot my brother, and some encouragement comes from knowing that my witness in the world has been more effective because of my thorn. In college, I was not involved in love relationships, so I was always able to give my "all" to my friends and love them as Christ loved us, offering all of myself. As a result, I have formed awesome relationships over the past several years and have had many opportunities to share God's love and his Gospel with non-believers, that I probably never would've had if I had been involved with "significant others" who took up my time.
It is horrible to think we may spend life "alone", but amazing to think that if we keep our eyes on Jesus, we will be satisfied. Just like the song says, he is "more than enough". Period. That means in any situation. Remember that the sufferings on earth will never compare to the glory that awaits us in heaven. Bro, I would love to hear from you, as I have never told this same problem to anyone before now either. It would be encouraging to know that there is someone else out there who feels like I do. May God bless you
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