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JPPT1974 said:I am a petite person with small breasts! Thought that I might tell you all also I am 5'2"!
love4jesus said:Why do I feel that I cannot get a boyfriend because I am not pretty? I keep telling myself that if I lost weight, got my scars removed, if I had bigger breasts, normal hearing, no mole on my neck, and nice hair someone would like me.All the wrong guys like me, guys that are weird. I don't know why I feel that a lot of guys only like girls for their beauty.
renaistre said:After all that has been said here, I think the only thing I can add (and even this might have been said) is that your frustrations are pretty common. In your case they might be harder to deal with because of the challenges you've had to overcome in your past, but there's nothing wrong with you just because you can't find a boyfriend.
That said, you might have a problem with low self-esteem, which would be understandable given your testimony. So if just venting now and then here on CF doesn't work (it usually does for me), you might want to think about professional counselling. But I'm an engineer, not a psywhateveryoucallit, so take my diagnosis with a bit of skepticism.
On an other note (not to derail the topic again, but...), what kind of keyboard style do you play? I used to visit the CF keyboard forum every now and then, but there seemed to be too many of the stereotypical arrogant musicians there.So when I see a fellow keyboardist somewhere else, I have to jump at the chance.
BlackLamb said:Hey,
First of all, I have to agree with everyone that says you're pretty, because you are! You don't look any of the things you think you are. But you know what? I don't think any number of compliments is going to help much in the long run. I know because I've been going through the same feelings for years. You said you had a crush of yours in middle school hurt you, right? Same thing with me. My middle school experiences completely crushed me, and when I came out of them and kind of matured more and people would tell me how pretty I was, it never healed the hurt and insecurity. I have trouble even looking at myself in a mirror a lot of the time. So even though you should recieve everyone's compliments as truth, it's going to take more to make the pain better. And that's going to involve realizing how wrong everyone that hurt you was. That they were the ones at fault, and there is nothing wrong with you. And it sounds so cliche, but it's only because it's true. And truth doesn't always equal easy. And I know what it's like to long for a mate. It just plain stinks. And people say, "Oh, you're young, you have pleanty of time". But that doesn't help when you see all these other people our age with boyfriends. It's not the most pleasant situation in the world. But please, if you feel like you need someone to talk to, don't hesitate to PM me. This issue you bring up is easily one of the biggest problems in my life, so I can relate.
Take care
love4jesus said:You are right, everyone in the world could tell me, "You are beautiful." I would become excited and confident but deep inside still lays a scar. I not only need to hear that I am beautiful but I want to feel loved. I need to re-dedicate my life to Christ. It is hard to live a Christian walk in my home because I hear so much criticism. We are the only people who yell and the only people who go to church on our block. I get so angry with the way my parents treat me. My mom is always putting me down and my dad ignores me. I guess I always wanted someone to be my friend. People always give me dirty looks when I smile at them or when I try to talk to them, they try to boss me around so my reaction is to reply in anger. I just need a friend, I need Jesus. I want to move away. People tell me, "Don't move away for the wrong reason." Believe me it is the right reason because it is crippling my walk with Christ.
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