Is self harm morally wrong?

[wolly]

Hi,I started to smoke because my own parents are mistreating me and I had no one to support me.I tried praying a lot but my prayers were unanswered and I had the idea that if I die of lung cancer everything will be better.I realise this is not the answer but it's very hard to live all by yourself.This isn't about stress this is about the continous state of struggling,loneliness and pressured by others.

I have no life and I have no idea what to do!

 

[rambot]

My friend. As someone who has been very by themself and is now surrounded by my own pod of happiness, let me just say: Being on your own in itself doesn't need to be a problem. Try to cultivate habits that you can do on your own. Find community events to connect with healthy people who will build you up. If you've moved on and are living on your own, then you get to choose which adults INCLUDING FAMILY you want to communicate regularly. Take care of yourself. The act of smoking can become (both chemically and behaviourally) a very soothing motion. Be careful!
If you live near nature, go explore it.
Write your thoughts down. Don't keep your thoughts only in your head; they need to escape.

 

[Joseph G]

Hi,I started to smoke because my own parents are mistreating me and I had no one to support me.I tried praying a lot but my prayers were unanswered and I had the idea that if I die of lung cancer everything will be better.I realise this is not the answer but it's very hard to live all by yourself.This isn't about stress this is about the continous state of struggling,loneliness and pressured by others.

I have no life and I have no idea what to do!

Hi wolly,

From a former smoker who has experienced all of the damage it causes both physically and spiritually and socially, I can say emphatically "yes" to your subject line. But I suspect you already know that from what you've stated in your post.

I would more broadly suggest to you that smoking is really just a symptom of a deeper more profound need that isn't being fulfilled. I think you allude to that need when you state that you "have no life."

That made me curious about your journey so I read your posts from beginning to present. First of all let me say that I can't begin to imagine some of things you have endured and I admire your courage in sharing them openly. Particularly in your struggles to experience answered prayers in relation to those challenges then and now.

I couldn't help notice though that a core question has never been asked. As a believer I feel compelled to offer that all of your stated needs - experiencing the love of God, understanding His true nature, getting answers to your prayers, procuring His help in overcoming trials and tribulations, and most poignantly realizing your purpose in life beyond salvation - all flow from this simple question..

Have you ever accepted Jesus Christ as your personal Savior and Lord? I ask not because I have made a presumption one way or the other - only you and God know for sure. I ask because I firmly believe that all advice given from myself and others will fall short if your relationship and identity have not been confirmed in your heart and spirit first and foremost. Your answer would simply grant us wisdom in how to proceed.

God bless.

 

[Brihaha]

Yes, harming yourself is morally wrong. If you are a believer in God and Jesus then all you need to do is open the bible and read some. Every time I read the bible I feel deeply satisfied. I am not joking. You will be blessed with more faith which correlates to reading the bible more which will evolve into a way of life.

I am alone quite a bit since the kids grew up and my marriage dissolved. But I am truly happy and grateful to have been blessed with faith. I finally picked up the bible and finished reading it during the pandemic. Hands down best decision I ever made. And I am a recovering alcoholic who quit drinking years ago. God literally carried me thru my drinking days so I could be alive to read the bible and truly be saved. Jesus is our savior man. He sacrificed his own mortal life so we could be graced with salvation. What a gift!! So in this vein I suggest you might do some good for other people. It helps you and others. We can't really fathom just how big an impact we make in the lives of others. Especially when we conscientiously help others out of sheer goodness. It sets a fine example for the world to see.

There's a couple of sayings I've utilized in my sobriety.

Keep
It
Simple
Stupid

That one reminds me not to try to fix everything at once.

This too shall pass. Fairly self explanatory but it never hurts to give yourself affirmations of encouragement.

The Serenity Prayer works well too.

Good luck my friend. Tomorrow is another day and happiness is your choice. Peace

 

[wolly]

Hi wolly,



Have you ever accepted Jesus Christ as your personal Savior and Lord? I ask not because I have made a presumption one way or the other - only you and God know for sure. I ask because I firmly believe that all advice given from myself and others will fall short if your relationship and identity have not been confirmed in your heart and spirit first and foremost. Your answer would simply grant us wisdom in how to proceed.

God bless.

My own life is a nightmare and you think praying will help? I spend most of my time in psych units and I felt like a vegetable.
I hate my life!

 

[Joseph G]

Yes I do wolly, I do think praying will help. In fact, it is ultimately the ONLY thing that will help. Along with Bible study to learn Who He is and what HE desires.

I can say I relate to you in one regard - my own life is a history of mental illness and psych wards. When I said I was familiar with years of stigma, shame, loneliness and despair - I meant it. And I'm saying to you that I found the answer to my deepest needs in the person of Jesus Christ.

And that's because my major problem was that I was, at core, a sinner separated from God. Once that was taken care of, everything else flowed from that.

What I've learned since receiving Him? As bad as ANY of us think we have it, none of our sufferings can compare to what He endured for our sake - during His lifetime and on the cross - to purchase for us what is most important to HIM - our very souls.

And yes, in addition to His atonement He also suffered all of our weaknesses while He was here so that He could demonstrate that His compassion for us is genuine. Particularly, He knows mental anguish well - because He endured it to a depth we could never handle. Who of us has ever sweat great drops of blood in anticipation for bearing the sins of the world? Who of us can say we've suffered more than the only pure, innocent Man to ever walk the earth?

To be clear, there's nothing wrong with seeking the things we seek. But again, everything else in life that we could ever want is subordinant and subsequent to His desire to establishing His presence in us and securing for us a new identity.

So I ask again as a point of reference, have you ever accepted Jesus Christ as your personal Savior and Lord?

 

[wolly]

Yes I do wolly, I do think praying will help. In fact, it is ultimately the ONLY thing that will help. Along with Bible study to learn Who He is and what HE desires.

I can say I relate to you in one regard - my own life is a history of mental illness and psych wards. When I said I was familiar with years of stigma, shame, loneliness and despair - I meant it. And I'm saying to you that I found the answer to my deepest needs in the person of Jesus Christ.

And that's because my major problem was that I was, at core, a sinner separated from God. Once that was taken care of, everything else flowed from that.

What I've learned since receiving Him? As bad as ANY of us think we have it, none of our sufferings can compare to what He endured for our sake - during His lifetime and on the cross - to purchase for us what is most important to HIM - our very souls.

And yes, in addition to His atonement He also suffered all of our weaknesses while He was here so that He could demonstrate that His compassion for us is genuine. Particularly, He knows mental anguish well - because He endured it to a depth we could never handle. Who of us has ever sweat great drops of blood in anticipation for bearing the sins of the world? Who of us can say we've suffered more than the only pure, innocent Man to ever walk the earth?

To be clear, there's nothing wrong with seeking the things we seek. But again, everything else in life that we could ever want is subordinant and subsequent to His desire to establishing His presence in us and securing for us a new identity.

So I ask again as a point of reference, have you ever accepted Jesus Christ as your personal Savior and Lord?

Well Jesus didn't save me with anything,I mean if there are good beings in heaven what's the point of good vs evil if you have no evidence on this subject?I really prayed 2 years ago and nothing good happened to me. I injected poison in my veins,I smoked ciggarettes and my own father didn't show any emphaty towards me.Why is this happening to me?
So if I go to hell at least I will have a better place because I insulted the holy spirit many times and maybe I can become a demon like Lilith

 

[Brihaha]

Well Jesus didn't save me with anything,I mean if there are good beings in heaven what's the point of good vs evil if you have no evidence on this subject?I really prayed 2 years ago and nothing good happened to me. I injected poison in my veins,I smoked ciggarettes and my own father didn't show any emphaty towards me.Why is this happening to me?
So if I go to hell at least I will have a better place because I insulted the holy spirit many times and maybe I can become a demon like Lilith

Jesus will help you when you are ready to help yourself friend. Sometimes many of us wallow in our self-pity for a while till we tire of the futility of it. I am guilty myself. We often create our own hell of misery. And no it is not a better choice.

At least you know your father. Some never do. Try to accentuate the positives rather than dwelling on pessimism. Be active in your own healing. Find a self help group or church to associate with others to whom you can relate. I still smoke cigarettes but rarely whine about people ignoring my problems anymore lol. Perceptions become reality and often lead to the death of reasoning. If you close your mind because you already made your decision, it occasionally prevents you from reasoning and thinking any deeper. You are a worthy person who simply can't feel that way or see your worth. Read the gospels. Jesus saved us all with his sacrifice. Millions of people can testify as evidence Jesus is our savior. This is the key to faith. If Jesus came and sat beside you it would be impossible for you to demonstrate your faith by obeying the commandments. You would know he is real but knowing prevents you from having an ability to use faith to show belief. The new covenant is established on faith alone, not works. It is by faith that anyone is granted salvation thru Jesus. I wish you well and am simply trying to be honest with you to help you rise out of your blues. I truly wish you well.

 

[Joseph G]

wolly,

Just a note to let you know that you are being prayed for and we are always here with an ear to hear - publicly or via pm. Hope you are prayerfully considering the advice given. I too encourage you not to give up on Him because He hasn't given up on YOU!

Romans 5:8

"But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

God bless!

 

[com7fy8]

Prayer for you . . .

 

[Diamond7]

I had the idea that if I die of lung cancer everything will be better.

Would you like to join us in the real world where people do not die, they end up sick on oxygen. Although I suppose if you want to sign the release form the doctors will give you some fentanyl and send you on your way. The Bible says to choose life, not death.

 

[Lily76_]

I started self harm in my teens and throughout my adulthood ., I have trauma , from abuse,. My dad ending his life and two friends also ending their lives, one of them in front of me . Drink and drug use, and facing the detraction of my mum who has Terminal Cancer and is at end of life care, my sister also having cancer. i am currently recovered from self harm, drink & Drugs the only things i do now is vape and I have anorexia and I have mental health issues Schizophrenia PTSD it is Morally wrong ....in the bible it is , it is said not to have tattoos or cut your body. but in mental health it helps make you survive trauma each person is different what can be traumatic to you is different for others who can brush it off ,i become Christian just before i found out that my mum had ternmal cancer and i am now Christian and reading the bible is starting to heal me but its one step at a time i have now got mental health support workers and i care plan ,AA & NA (recovery meetings ) unsure how i will be after my mum goes but i do know that Jesus Loves me and his healing is starting on me but sometimes things are put in our path for a reason that only Jesus Knows and the word of God its self has healing power of Jesus