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Is rejection deserved?

blackribbon

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Accepting who you are is a loooonnnggg trajectory. Learn to enjoy the journey, one minute at a time

However, the time to start is right now...and the first step is just accepting that you are who you are for a reason, even if you don't see that reason at this time. If you focus on what you don't like, your life will always be self-focused and selfish...and unhappy. If you recognize that you have something to give and set out to figure out what that is, you start to become a giving person and that is when you start to live.
 
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S.O.J.I.A.

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Hi all, Just wondering about this.

if a young person with autism is rejected/shunned/discluded. due to their lack of social skills or inability to initiate friendship, is the rejection deserved?

how can someone with autism seek to be healed from the wounds of rejection when their rejection was warranted because of their condition?

"deserved" or "warranted" aren't the right words. "consequential" is a more accurate term.

if you don't develop social skills the consequence of that is you will run into trouble in terms of social interaction.
 
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Ben Collyer

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"deserved" or "warranted" aren't the right words. "consequential" is a more accurate term.

if you don't develop social skills the consequence of that is you will run into trouble in terms of social interaction.

indeed, but I was not diagnosed or offered social skills training as a child, so it must be that God sovereignly allowed the circumstances of my childhood to occur. for whatever reason, only he knows.
 
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Dave-W

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f a young person with autism is rejected/shunned/discluded. due to their lack of social skills or inability to initiate friendship, is the rejection deserved?
Absolutely not.
how can someone with autism seek to be healed from the wounds of rejection when their rejection was warranted because of their condition?
That answer would be the same if you are suffering rejection from autism, or the color of your skin, or your accent, or how fat/skinny you are, or how tall or short you are, .......

You put the rejection on Christ:

Isaiah 53:3 He was despised and rejected of men,
A man of sorrows and acquainted with grief;
And like one from whom men hide their face
He was despised, and we did not esteem Him.​
 
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S.O.J.I.A.

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indeed, but I was not diagnosed or offered social skills training as a child, so it must be that God sovereignly allowed the circumstances of my childhood to occur. for whatever reason, only he knows.

k,

1 Corinthians 10:13

so are you going to put in the work to improve yourself in order to have a better life or not?
 
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ToBeLoved

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I think this is one of the reasons people need to be diagnosed with illnesses and mental illnesses.

Because then the person can study the disease and know the issues that most people with the disease face and the side effects if that is applicable.

When we know the probable issues we can be proactive and expect the issues to affect our lives.

We need to educate ourselves
 
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Ancient of Days

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Life isn't fair or unfair, its just life. Its not what happens to us that causes discomfort its how we REACT to it that causes us discomfort.

Helps to emotional stability
 
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Sabertooth

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if a young person with autism is rejected/shunned/discluded. due to their lack of social skills or inability to initiate friendship, is the rejection deserved?
Since elementary school, I have beaten this by associating with other Aspies. (And this was before I ever even heard about Asperger's. ;))
 
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Sabertooth

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..., so it must be that God sovereignly allowed the circumstances of my childhood to occur. for whatever reason, only he knows.
Instead of blaming God for your circumstances, why don't you ask YHVH Rapha if He might heal/fix them? Even if He doesn't choose to rescind your autism, He is still willing to fix your surrounding issues.

"You have not because you ask not." James 4:2
 
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Ben Collyer

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Instead of blaming God for your circumstances, why don't you ask YHVH Rapha if He might heal/fix them? Even if He doesn't choose to rescind your autism, He is still willing to fix your surrounding issues.

"You have not because you ask not." James 4:2

because he ordained my circumstances, he is sovereign
 
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Sabertooth

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because he ordained my circumstances, he is sovereign
What makes you think that all of your circumstances are ordained (as they are)?

As a consequence of his poor decisions, the "prodigal son" ended up living in a pigpen. God only ordained that to remind him that he didn't have to live like that (and that choices have consequences).

You can only claim that He is a God who will not intervene on your behalf if you are an agnostic (autistic).

If you are an adopted Christian that knows Him as "Abba, Father," you should be running to Him with every little problem that you encounter (and stop making excuses for not doing so).
 
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BryanJohnMaloney

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Hi all, Just wondering about this.

if a young person with autism is rejected/shunned/discluded. due to their lack of social skills or inability to initiate friendship, is the rejection deserved?

how can someone with autism seek to be healed from the wounds of rejection when their rejection was warranted because of their condition?

No. It is not deserved. It is not your fault if you are surrounded by those who refuse to be Christ-like.

Their rejection was NOT WARRANTED! The abused to NOT "earn" the abuse. Satan inspires others to abuse and reject them. It is that simple.
 
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BryanJohnMaloney

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by the grace of God I actually have a lot of friends, People consistently tell me that they like me and that I am "sweet" and "lovely"...ofcourse there are those who dislike me for whatever reason.

but in spite of these appraisals and my apparent strong social life...I am still a very wounded and depressed person. I hate the fact I have autism, i HATE it. I do not want to be different. there is something about me that is as yet unhealed, insecure, feeling unloved.

I also struggle with the message that God made me this way, i can understand that in his sovereign purpose he allowed me to be born autistic, but it has brought me nothing but pain and grief

In early life, you have been indoctrinated that "different = bad". That's what it boils down to. Satan has lied to you. Sameness is what the Enemy wants. He wants us to all worship sameness and conformity. Look at the most evil movements in history, the totalitarian states. Germany 1933-1945, Cambodia under Pol Pot, China under the Cultural Revolution, they all were about imposing sameness and rejecting difference. They all were about punishing the different.
 
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Amy Cortright

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Hi all, Just wondering about this.

if a young person with autism is rejected/shunned/discluded. due to their lack of social skills or inability to initiate friendship, is the rejection deserved?

how can someone with autism seek to be healed from the wounds of rejection when their rejection was warranted because of their condition?


The Bible says Christians will be rejected many times do to the fact that they are good people not poor people. Not all rejection is deserved. But carefully evaluate your own behavior and see if it is really Asperger's that is causes the rejection or simply something else you are doing. You must feel confident in who you are however, and if you are a good person and blameless you can't allow others opinions of you to hurt you so much. Know it can be lonely at times if most reject you, yet you can pray and have God a lot of the time. I pray that you find a good circle of friends who will accept you for you and understand your strengths and weakness well.

Amy
 
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Rescued One

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Hi all, Just wondering about this.

if a young person with autism is rejected/shunned/discluded. due to their lack of social skills or inability to initiate friendship, is the rejection deserved?

how can someone with autism seek to be healed from the wounds of rejection when their rejection was warranted because of their condition?

If possible find the one friend who accepts you. People need to wake up and that may take more years. I'm not autistic but we moved every year when I was growing up. I now have two close friends who live in other states.

Rejection isn't deserved on the basis of autism! But remember there are others who don't do well at making friends.
 
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ToBeLoved

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indeed, but I was not diagnosed or offered social skills training as a child, so it must be that God sovereignly allowed the circumstances of my childhood to occur. for whatever reason, only he knows.
I don’t know if I believe that.

We as people sin and are sinful. It could have been a mistake, or lack of knowledge/education about the disease or just a bad choice by your parents.

Whenever sin is involved, I don’t see it as a divine directive. God does give us free will.

I would really think through this belief, especially if it is centered around Calvinist theology.
 
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