Disclaimer: I am not a lawyer, and my advice should not be construed as me giving legal advice. It is just life advice from similar life experience.
My first piece of advice is to stop saying that you are being abusive. Based just on what you posted, the things you describe are not you abusing anyone. Maybe you're being humble or maybe there's some other motivation, but if you are not harming her or specifically doing anything that keeps her from contacting her family or whatever else, don't say that you're being abusive. That could be an admission of a crime in some contexts, and if you're not doing it, then don't say that you're doing it.
Secondly, I have experience in this kind of thing, and my mistake was that I was naive and didn't protect myself, and wanted to "stick it out" because staying married at all costs was the "right thing to do", and I have suffered the consequences of that naiveté for many years (when I say "protect myself", I don't mean physical self-defense. I mean that I didn't look out for my own well-being and take steps to make sure I was ok). She is hitting and biting you. Period. It is normal and natural to feel angry when someone hits and bites you and makes you feel marginalized and like you don't have a voice or an opinion that matters. You're not the bad guy for being angry about that. If she is hitting and biting you, SHE is the one in the wrong, and you are the victim of her abuse. Period.
Here is what will happen if you don't look out for your own well-being: she will continue to hit you and abuse you until you snap and retaliate. When that finally happens, she will play the victim and call the police and you'll go to jail. The other option is that she'll continue to do this until you destroy yourself. Either way she'll get exactly what she wants.
If you continue to be abused by her, your life will be destroyed. She will continue until she destroys you one way or another. You MUST understand that. Please.
I agree about the holiness and sanctity of marriage, but your very life is on the line. Protect your life. Obviously don't physically do anything to her or to anyone else. Just don't keep allowing her to destroy your life, because she will.
I don't disagree with finding a Christian counselor, but also understand that the ability to regurgitate Bible verses does not qualify a person to be a counselor. Make sure you talk to someone who is legitimate. There are excellent and legitimate counselors out there who are Christians, but in my own experience, people slap the "Christian" label into their professional title but are absolute crap counselors. I have dealt with that directly.
I understand that it is difficult to see clearly right now. You might even think you're seeing clearly right now, but in ten years you'll look back and see just how clouded your vision and judgment are right now. Get yourself some help. Talk to someone about what is going on. Find the money for an attorney to get professional legal advice, because you WILL need legal advice and protection. Don't say things that could be construed as an admission of a crime if you haven't committed one. Don't let her make you say anything that could come back to bite you in the rear end. If you haven't done anything wrong, don't jump on the grenade for her just to keep her from appearing wrong or guilty. If she is destroying you, don't defend her.
What I think is the most straightforward immediate solution is to arrange for yourself a place to temporarily stay, and go file a restraining order, citing the type of abuse you are enduring. After that, you can explore other legal options and seek professional counseling. That will give you a measure of protection while you clear your head and explore all the options to protect yoursel.
But, of course, talk to a lawyer.
