I'm a devout christian but I dont know how god expects me to handle urges plz help!

[Boidae]

Masturbation is sin. I got convicted by doing it, and I'd get convicted if I'd do it. I got sad like a whole day when I did it, maybe even depressed.

It opens doors to sexual thoughts/sexual temptations.

Watch this:

[youtube]583aZdjisS8[/youtube]

You were convicted of it, yet I have not. Maybe your own masturbation was leading to sin, yet mine does not.

My thoughts are strictly of my wife and no one else. Can I commit adultery against my wife with thoughts of only her while masturbating?

 

[CounselorForChrist]

Theres lots of views on mastubartion but people to often mix the views together. The simple biblical fact is it is NOT a sin to touch. Sin only takes places when you you picture someone and therefor lust while masturbating.

Some people will say masturbations a sin simply because you might have the tempation for dirty thoughts. But thats overboard. If it were true why go outside? You might have the temptation to yell at someone. Why go to the store, you might have the tempation to steal. Why go walking, you might be tempted to think dirty thoughts about someone you come across.

See my point? Everything is this world is tempting. And yet we do not avoid the world. We just have to have self control when it comes to temptation. Its only a sin if you let temptation get the best of you. So touch away!

 

[BornAgainGrace414]

Do you see Jesus doing it?
I highly doubt it.

Masturbation while married is another story, as that's something that can be done together and it wouldn't be outside of marriage if not together.

Not juding either way, if you haven't been convicted, then maybe not. But I do ask that you pray on the matter and ask for clarity.

 

[Boidae]

Do you see Jesus doing it?
I highly doubt it.

Masturbation while married is another story, as that's something that can be done together and it wouldn't be outside of marriage if not together.

Not juding either way, if you haven't been convicted, then maybe not. But I do ask that you pray on the matter and ask for clarity.

I have and did.

BTW, the MB that I am doing is not with my wife, but thoughts of my wife.

My wife has multiple sclerosis and from that has an extremely low sex drive, while mine is extremely high. Sex is very infrequent at best for me.

Masturbation itself is not a sin, but the thoughts that accompany it can lead to sin as if when you're married thinking of someone that isn't your wife. That would be committing adultery in your mind through lust against her, but you can not commit adultery in your mind against her, with thoughts of only her.

 

[BornAgainGrace414]

I have and did.

BTW, the MB that I am doing is not with my wife, but thoughts of my wife.

My wife has multiple sclerosis and from that has an extremely low sex drive, while mine is extremely high. Sex is very infrequent at best for me.

Masturbation itself is not a sin, but the thoughts that accompany it can lead to sin as if when you're married thinking of someone that isn't your wife. That would be committing adultery in your mind through lust against her, but you can not commit adultery in your mind against her, with thoughts of only her.

I agree, I think masturbation is acceptable while married because you're clearly having your wife in mind, which is in no way inappropriate to lust about.

 

[lemon-aid stand]

I was told in health class that females normally experience urges but I spoke with my parents and they said such urges are sinful. In health class they told us all that its perfectly normal but the bible tells people things like this arent right. so what should I be doing?

I really love jesus and want to be true to god but if god made me how can I be true and deny who I am normally

plz help i just want to be a good person but im really confused as to what I need 2 be doing

i get this as well.. you are not alone.. i think we all do.. all i can say. is don't beat yourself up over it.. set your focus on Christ and not on the sin.. He measures the heart.. i am bothered by this though.. so i will pray for you.. and please pray for me.. in Christ Jesus.. dale

 

[KatILoveJesus]

so why would you suggest things like masturbation, if that is designed to release a physical urge wouldn't i be better by avoiding it and remaining pure? i guess my concern is how does acknowleding immoral thoughts (even if I dont act on them) help me to be loved by jesus. the idea of taking every though hostage, i dont know if im up for that, i dont know if i have that much strength over my thoughts so please lets be honest.

Can i think about these things like these urges without being sinful? if i keep them just as thoughts in my mind? as thoughts as prisoner?

 

[DreamerOfHearts]

I was told in health class that females normally experience urges but I spoke with my parents and they said such urges are sinful. In health class they told us all that its perfectly normal but the bible tells people things like this arent right. so what should I be doing?

I really love jesus and want to be true to god but if god made me how can I be true and deny who I am normally

plz help i just want to be a good person but im really confused as to what I need 2 be doing

Lot's daughters got their dad drunk and slept with him, thinking the world had ended and there were no men left.

Granted, their minds were probably fried after what they went through.



Sex is for procreation, start thinking about what it is you want in a man, and how many children you want. Stuff like that.


Keep yourself occupied on the long term.


In Christ, everyone is connected, so spiritually that kind of stuff can flood the church.

 

[KatILoveJesus]

I'm just confused. it seems like i can do whatever i want in the eyes of jesus if i apologize for it later. and honestly i really want to explore these urges with a man. its not my fault i have them! if god made me how i am then why should i fight so hard the feelings i feel? idk i just wonder why the other girls in my class can have their "romantic nights" that they blab on to me about but i cant have that, like i dont deserve it or something? thats the idea that really gets me upset. cant i make some mistakes now? isn't that what im supposed to be doing? i mean i dont want to betray jesus but at the same time it seems like normal girls my age are engaging in this kind of thing so why cant i? why dont i deserve it?


im really uncertain about this whole thing in case you cant tell

 

[ChrisHolland619]

It's not sinful to WANT sex, it's sinful to HAVE sex before you are wedlocked.

Sex is not a sin. Sex is good. God likes sex. After you're married.

 

[CounselorForChrist]

i mean i dont want to betray jesus but at the same time it seems like normal girls my age are engaging in this kind of thing so why cant i? why dont i deserve it?

First off, lots of people do things that I choose not to. They smoke weed, the party hard, they have sex outside marraige....etc. Just because they are doing it doens't mean its right. They have to answer to God for what they do. SO don't be pulled in by peer pressure to sin. Because just as they will have to answer to God, you will to. And God isn't going to like it if you say "Well they sinned, why couldn't I!". You know the rules of the bibles.

Also take note that the bible never says when your a christian life will be perfect and happy. Its a hard life alot of times. We have to sacrifice alot and be ridiculed by others. Even Jesus when on earth was tempted by the things that go on down here. So if he was tempted...we will defintly be tempted!!!

Lasty and perhaps the most imporant....you should be using God as your role model/example. We are to be like him. Not be like a human who sins daily. A good saying I was told when it came to wanting to do what others did was "If your friends tell you to jump off a cliff...will you?". Ignore what others do/have.

Beacuse not only is it a sin to do the stuff that they are, but by being jealous/envyious of what they can do, you are sinning even more! Does that suck sometimes? Heck yeah, I can admit that! But what matters to me is what happens when I die. So I try to live like Jesus.

Also if you think about it...what does anything matter as humans? Having a fancy car, designer purses, big tvs....this is all temporary. When we die none of it goes with us! Our real treausers are on heaven! Now you might say "But I'd still like to enjoy my life here anyways!". Well you can, again thats your choice! But, isn't a lifetime of hardship worth the price of everlasting life? When you do die and the universe is destroyed, God will create a new earth! We get to live here (well there) with perfect bodies and never have to worry about sin! So I'd much rather suffer here and get rewarded later then enjoy here and suffer later....for eternity in hell.

it seems like i can do whatever i want in the eyes of jesus if i apologize for it later

Don't look to much into that. Many people say "Well...its ok if I sin because I can just ask for forgivness!". This is not true. If you are purposley sinning then using forgiveness as a way out each time so you can just sin again, then God will not accept that. He knows your motives and your thoughts in everything you do. Remember that! Because on judgment day he will replay EVERY good and bad thing we did in life and at that time no excuse will matter.

Now, this doesn't mean you won't sin. We often will sin over and over and over on the same thing. This is why we have to get better and try not to sin at all. We are sinners at nature. Just keep on working on your life and making it God oriented. Fight through this battle and the victory after death wil outweigh ANYTHING you "could have had" in this life.

I'll be praying for strength for you!

 

[KatILoveJesus]

First off, lots of people do things that I choose not to. They smoke weed, the party hard, they have sex outside marraige....etc. Just because they are doing it doens't mean its right. They have to answer to God for what they do. SO don't be pulled in by peer pressure to sin. Because just as they will have to answer to God, you will to. And God isn't going to like it if you say "Well they sinned, why couldn't I!". You know the rules of the bibles.

Also take note that the bible never says when your a christian life will be perfect and happy. Its a hard life alot of times. We have to sacrifice alot and be ridiculed by others. Even Jesus when on earth was tempted by the things that go on down here. So if he was tempted...we will defintly be tempted!!!

Lasty and perhaps the most imporant....you should be using God as your role model/example. We are to be like him. Not be like a human who sins daily. A good saying I was told when it came to wanting to do what others did was "If your friends tell you to jump off a cliff...will you?". Ignore what others do/have.

Beacuse not only is it a sin to do the stuff that they are, but by being jealous/envyious of what they can do, you are sinning even more! Does that suck sometimes? Heck yeah, I can admit that! But what matters to me is what happens when I die. So I try to live like Jesus.

Also if you think about it...what does anything matter as humans? Having a fancy car, designer purses, big tvs....this is all temporary. When we die none of it goes with us! Our real treausers are on heaven! Now you might say "But I'd still like to enjoy my life here anyways!". Well you can, again thats your choice! But, isn't a lifetime of hardship worth the price of everlasting life? When you do die and the universe is destroyed, God will create a new earth! We get to live here (well there) with perfect bodies and never have to worry about sin! So I'd much rather suffer here and get rewarded later then enjoy here and suffer later....for eternity in hell.


Don't look to much into that. Many people say "Well...its ok if I sin because I can just ask for forgivness!". This is not true. If you are purposley sinning then using forgiveness as a way out each time so you can just sin again, then God will not accept that. He knows your motives and your thoughts in everything you do. Remember that! Because on judgment day he will replay EVERY good and bad thing we did in life and at that time no excuse will matter.

Now, this doesn't mean you won't sin. We often will sin over and over and over on the same thing. This is why we have to get better and try not to sin at all. We are sinners at nature. Just keep on working on your life and making it God oriented. Fight through this battle and the victory after death wil outweigh ANYTHING you "could have had" in this life.

I'll be praying for strength for you!

I believe that you are right. I want to always be morale but honesty when i talk to the other girls in my class they argue a good point. im sure its immorale but they argue that acting on your urges is ok and if god wanted you to pretend you dont have urges he wouldnt have given you them! thats what they tell me and i want to despute them but i dont have any good reason!

if god loves me so much why does he give me sinful urges? i want to be a morale person but if ill be honest this whole thing seems like i have to fight my own biochemistry to be right in the eyes of god why would god make me in such a way to leave me so easily tempted?

 

[KatILoveJesus]

i just want to be a good person but it seems sometimes like god made my body in such a way to want me to be bad

that is the part that i really struggle with tbqh

 

[lemon-aid stand]

I was told in health class that females normally experience urges but I spoke with my parents and they said such urges are sinful. In health class they told us all that its perfectly normal but the bible tells people things like this arent right. so what should I be doing?

I really love jesus and want to be true to god but if god made me how can I be true and deny who I am normally

plz help i just want to be a good person but im really confused as to what I need 2 be doing

start by using capitals at the beginning of the God and Jesus.. i know that i would be more at ease with you. just seeing the respect.. but the bible doesn't say that those urges are evil.. it says to have self control.. God knows that you are struggling.. just do your best to follow His will for your life.. He looks at your heart. not what you are doing.. does this mean that you should just throw your arms up.. no never.. we are to fight the good fight.. and when we come up short.. God's grace abounds.. best wishes.. i know that i have answered this exact thread from the same naughty girl before.. are you just waiting for someone to say go ahead.. it'll be alright.. strive against it you.. atleast as best you can.. i was reading what your girlfriends are telling you.. they are not giving you sound christian advice.. maybe it is best to find more biblically based friendship.. how do you expect to prevail when you are operating in a secular group of friends.. you will never prevail, until you make the appropriate changes.. start living and acting like a christian.. then you will start having a positive result.. how do we live and act christian.. we make Jesus Christ the standard for our life, and march after His order.. we do not make our friends the standard..

 

[DreamerOfHearts]

I'm just confused. it seems like i can do whatever i want in the eyes of jesus if i apologize for it later. and honestly i really want to explore these urges with a man. its not my fault i have them! if god made me how i am then why should i fight so hard the feelings i feel? idk i just wonder why the other girls in my class can have their "romantic nights" that they blab on to me about but i cant have that, like i dont deserve it or something? thats the idea that really gets me upset. cant i make some mistakes now? isn't that what im supposed to be doing? i mean i dont want to betray jesus but at the same time it seems like normal girls my age are engaging in this kind of thing so why cant i? why dont i deserve it?


im really uncertain about this whole thing in case you cant tell

I am sure Jesus totally doesn't care if you touch or whatever.

What God does care about is when people sleep around a lot which means they are breaking up a lot and ruining people's hearts and lives.

Society today says "sex is for fun", yet if you look at the reality, it is about a serious relationship, procreation, and deep bonding uniting two people closer then they ever could be united otherwise. Though that does depend on how much their souls are entwined and how deeply in love with each other they are.

With my wife she knows every little thing I am thinking, regardless of where I am. Not even a joke.

We also talk on the phone all day when I am on business trips.

Digressing there... but point is masturbation is not even a sin listed in the Law, and we are not under the Law. "There is now no condemnation under Christ".

When you finally find someone, you won't have such problems. You will find someone, just keep up your appearances, and be bold and confident.

 

[CounselorForChrist]

if god loves me so much why does he give me sinful urges? i want to be a morale person but if ill be honest this whole thing seems like i have to fight my own biochemistry to be right in the eyes of god why would god make me in such a way to leave me so easily tempted?

He doens't give you any sinful urges. Sin (some say the devil) gives you those. If Eve hadn't bitten the apple, there would be no sin. But since she did, we suffer from temptations and sinful things. God just wants you to live like Jesus as cloesly as you can, he know no human will ever be perfect.

 

[Simon Tanner]

So what am I supposed to do? Ignore "sexual urges"? Or acknowledge them. PLZ be direct idk what to do here.

I know sex is wrong and should only happen in marriage but what should I do NOW? Should i try to fight these sinful urges or what?

Plz I'm very confused as to how to behave right.

Kat, you are not alone. I'm reminded of one evening where a woman friend and I attended a play (with dancing!!!) at conservative evangelical College in Los Angeles. At intermission, my friend came running out of the girls bathroom laughing so hard she could hardly talk. She compelled me to come into the bathroom and the phenomenom was inescapable. A girl had written these words: "Girls, I've been dated James for six months and I'm starting to have these feellings, What do I do??:" The entire wall was covered by advice ranging from the practical (invidual cold showers; a couple sitting on a bed always having 3-4 legs on the flooir; etc. etc) to the pastoral (recite scripture silenly, always having a third person presentm etc,) I don't begin to do justice to the wall and the exuberant care with which it had been PLASTERED with advice. You are not alone, Kat. You honor God by sharing your struggles (really). You'll get PLENTY of advice (purity ring, throwing yourself into good works, etc)..Maybe some of this will help you, maybe not. Please remember two things: God created you as you are, right now, and he loves you--he even LIKES you.

 

[Simon Tanner]

So what am I supposed to do? Ignore "sexual urges"? Or acknowledge them. PLZ be direct idk what to do here.

I know sex is wrong and should only happen in marriage but what should I do NOW? Should i try to fight these sinful urges or what?

Plz I'm very confused as to how to behave right.

Kat, you are not alone. I'm reminded of one evening where a woman friend and I attended a play (with dancing!!!) at conservative evangelical College in Los Angeles. At intermission, my friend came running out of the girls bathroom laughing so hard she could hardly talk. She compelled me to come into the bathroom and the phenomenom was inescapable. A girl had written these words: "Girls, I've been dating James for six months and I'm starting to have these _feelings_, What do I do??:" The entire wall was covered by advice ranging from the practical (individual cold showers; if a couple sits on a bed always having 4 legs on the floor; etc. etc) to the pastoral (recite scripture silently, always having a third person present, go on group dates, pray with a girlfriend about the guy and not one-on-on with the guy (or vice versa). I don't begin to do justice to the wall and the exuberant care with which it had been PLASTERED with advice.There are TONS of Christian Dating books out there (Paul and Virginia Friesen among many other authors have written based on their experience leading youth groups.). You are not alone, Kat. You honor God by sharing your struggles (really). You'll get PLENTY of advice (purity ring, throwing yourself into good works, etc)..Maybe some of this will help you, maybe not. Please remember these things: Many people struggle with such things all their life, so go easy on yoursefl God created you as you are, right now, and he loves you--he even LIKES you.