If you had it to do all over again.....

[JoeNah]

We all have regrets. But would you, given the chance, change what you have done in the past? Remember that we do not know how the changes would "play out" - we don't know what would be the end results of how we changed things.

I wouldn't. There are things that I wish I had done differently, but I am not sure I would change the way my life has "played out" because I would be afraid that I wouldn't have what I have now.

My wife and I will celebrate our 30th wedding anniversary, next month. Neither of us has been married to someone else. We have 2 sons, 1 daughter, all of whom are grown, and know the Lord Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior. My older son is married and has a son and a daughter. I like being a grampa! If I went back, and did something differently, it is my belief that I might not have what I have now.

Any thoughts?

 

[davedajobauk]

For sure we cannot 'reincarnate' ourselves
So, we are, talking hypothetically.....

As our Lord, knew our outcome,
when we were 'knit' in our Mother's wombs...
I would venture... that could we go back and give our lives 'a makeover'
that to actually do-so, might, be a direct challenge to, His will for us

Yes of-course! with the wisdom of our years
we COULD, want to sin 'less' ... but, we have been forgiven our sins
iow: it is as if all sin, had not been committed [?]

Yes, I can, recall some moments, when, armed with today's 'hiindsight'
I could possibly have pre-empted some major catastrophe/ disaster
BUT... here again, might such action [prevention] been contrary to His will [?]

No, no-regrets!
What has transpired throughout my life has doubtless,
shorn my long hair, bruised my knees and elbows
abraded all of my 'rough-edges'
and transformed me... beyond-comparison

This, was His intent, for me...

What has been
is unchangeable..
and by His grace
we, continue to grow




dave

 

[buttercup2000]

I try not to think about "what might have been," and do think that if I undid or did something I might not be very happy with the outcome. I try daily to be grateful for the life I have been privileged to have and to make the best of each new day to come.

 

[tansy]

Funnily enough, I've been thinking a lot about that kind of thing lately...if only I'd done this, or that. But then I think, maybe I would have done worse things or made worse mistakes, or different mistakes, or I could be in a worse circumstances than I now am.

I do sometimes think, if only I'd come to know God when I was much younger, maybe things would have been a lot better. But then, perhaps in the end it doesnt really make much difference ultimately...I don't know.

 

[Katryna]

I will be honest and say a few things.

I wish I had finished my education, and built a bit of career for myself. I didn't think that was important (it wasn't stressed for me by my parents, not necessary for *girls*), and when I got older I did the "good Christian woman" thing and stayed home with my kids. While I think that is VERY important, when I tried to re-enter the work force there was nothing meaningful to be had for me... and the unemployment rate and economy what it is now --- well, that area of my life is the pits right now, and the kids are gone.

Secondly, I think I was too hasty in the marriage department. I was unhappy at home (dad was an alcoholic), and I married to get out. First husband was also a substance abuser, and got one of his partying friends pregnant. I left. Remarried two years later, again, a non-Christian and in a hurry to re-start my life... the man 11 years my senior, divorced with 3 kids --- a lot to take on at 24. He also lied to me, telling me his first wife was a sexual refuser, when the truth was it was he that had no desire. I have lived 28 years trying to make this marriage "work", with a man who would be perfectly happy as a monk. Now that he is in his early 60's, the likelihood of change is nil, and I fight a daily battle with depression.

So yes... if I could have seen what lay ahead, I would have prepared myself for a little self-sufficiency and not married out of a sense of urgency.

 

[davedajobauk]

To underline, those things I mentioned above

We come into this world with NOTHING

Therefore, if we COULD go back and start over
we would do so WITHOUT
the benefit of, gained knowledge and experience
> that we presently have [?]

LOGIC: [?] we would 'begin again'
just as naive as we were, the first time-around
and would therefore, PROBABLY
make a similar 'hash' of, similar circumstances

~
that DAY....

you did... what you had-to
with what you had
and from where you were
you LEARNED....

'one-day-at-a-time'

just as we were meant-to... [?]

find peace, in so much as you are here... and 'headed'
toward home



dave

 

[kaykay9.0]

Since we lost our only child at age 16, one of my biggest regrets is not having other children. However, I'm not sure I could have changed that anyway. So I try not to beat myself up about it. Often we berate ourselves for things that given the circumstances, we did the best we could with the knowledge we had.

So we might as well walk forward learning from the past.

 

[servant of Merciful Love]

We would have landscaped/leveled our back yard to make it bigger with a patio (just a small porch out back now and very 'woodsy').

 

[davedajobauk]

LOL Gail....

I managed to landscape the rear garden
of my past matrimonial home [years ago]

It took many years to erect a perimeter wall
to raise the soil-level towards the far end
for lawns, the goldfish pools and the sheds

a wonderful effort... by myself
though not, without considerable expense
for materials...
Our gardens, were acknowledged by many
as, THE BEST IN THE STREET
if only, for the lack of effort... by others

However... and here is the reason for this post

All things that man does [can achieve]
will not endure the test of time

I google-earth'd a map that enabled me to view that property
an image taken only-recently
This shows that the rear gardens
iow: everything inside the perimeter wall had been excavated
by, the new owner, who, is turning a four-bedroomed house
into two flats [ground/first floor apartments]
the shed-outbuildings/ pools / lawns / border gardens
patio and seating finished in terrazo style [marble-effect]

all now gone....

pffffffftttt !!!

What did I achieve [back then] what difference did I make
so temporary, that I might have left it 'untouched'
as-did so-many others in that street



dave

 

[sk8Joyful]

We all have regrets. But would you, given the chance, change what you have done in the past?

If I went back, and did something differently, it is my belief that I might not have what I have now.

Any thoughts?

Your last sentence, kind of sums up our learning experiences... and while a million times over, I wish I had not let that one person in '84 into my life, (for he pre-empted & harmed so much else), yet with prayer even that turned out ok. My faith was saved, and daughter's as well. And with time, the rest will too

 

[Rev.Ozzie]

After giving this a lot of thought I have to say no. As it turns out I have four wonderful sons two of which are in full time ministry all are doing what they like to do and are happy. If I would go back and change anything that to might change.I learn from the things that did not happen the way I wanted them to and stand amazed at the things God has worked out in my life. There is an older movie that I would recommend watching titled "Mr.Destiny" well worth the time to watch it.