AnEmpiricalAgnostic said:
ID is the theory that if you take creationism and do a find/replace operation that effectively changes the word god to designer you will be able to sneak it into the science curriculum via religious advocates in power on the school board thereby circumventing the separation of church and state and driving a wedge into the secular science curriculum.
I gotta work on the replacement cast of characters... close though.. but no cigar
The Elohim: any number of extra-terrestrial scientist dna manipulators, creators of all life on this planet after some terraforming.
GOD: Translated incorrectly from Elohim, which means in Hebrew "those who come from the sky"
Lord: Yahweh, the council leader in charge of the Earth project
"Inspired Word of God" - the Truth, given to our Prophets, who's mindset couldn't understand science, so wrote in terms of their peers, rather than the Elohim. Boy did we get it wrong!
Angels of the Lord: any number of the Elohim, in their terrestrial suits with jet packs on their arms and legs. I guess they had what looked like wings to help them get around
Fallen Angel: those who were exiled or left here on earth, they weren't "taken up" back to their home planet.
Sons of God: reference to the Elohim
Sons of Man: humans
Satan: a governmental employee of the Elohim home planet who was claiming that we're horrible creations and should be done away with. He set out to prove it, saying Job loved Yahweh because of the wonderful life he had. So the deal was made to try to break him, Satan wanted to prove to Yahweh that if he lost everything, he'd hate Yahweh. Didn't work. When the test was over, Yahweh gave him back the lives that were taken. recreated from their original DNA, memory and all.
Michael, Gabriel, Uriel, Lucifer, and a whole list of names of "angels"... all the Elohim have names, just like we have names. Apparently they have name preferences above ours.. which have their own meanings. i.e. Simon became Peter, Saul became Paul, Jesus (they don't mention his original name)
Jonah's "big fish" (OT) and/or "whale" (NT) was a type of submarine -- to them it was a big fish or whale, today we'd call it a submarine. No supernatural reason for being able to "live 3 days inside the belly of a whale" if it were a sub like we know about
Jacob's Ladder: the steps that unfold from a space ship
Taken up: joining the elohim on their flying crafts
Moses' white cloud following them in the desert.. shining brightly by day (sun reflection?) and 'leading the way' at night (floodlights?)
The Burning Bush: illuminated by floodlights, what else would Moses think it was? He didn't understand artifical light, it must have been fire.. but it didn't burn up anything... hmmm...
Jesus' resurrection: the "angels" opened up the tomb and recreated him from his DNA they stored before the big 'event'
Noahs' Ark: this was a mind blower. After the Sons of God mated (gee, total dna/chromosomal compatibility?) with the Daughters of Men, the homeplanet goverment didn't like what was going on, they wanted to can the project and destroy all creation. Enoch was already taken up and with the Elohim, which would be why Noah was noticed and picked. Supposedly Noah, his family, and representative families from the other 6 races, were put on a Space ship, not a boat ship, WITH ALL the creations and life forms created here on Earth. Not living, breathing, eating, excreting animals and sea life, JUST their DNA in storage. They were 'saved' from the destruction of the life on this planet. They had to stay in the ship until the planet was habitable again.
Supposedly this is how the Pangea became all the other continents and still 'drift' today. The deluge (atomic bombardment?) is what created the multiple tectonic plates.. and it's why all the continents seem to fit as puzzle peaces. and maybe why, as JohnR7 always pointed out, Greenland seems to have Flipped.
There's also another thread here about 'meteors' hitting the earth, in a form of a pattern, and all seem to be 'from the same time frame'. Wow, another Match to their story!
As for Jesus and all the jargon about who he is, and the disagreement with the Koran and BoM comments about him being a man... they explain all that too.
In Genesis 6, the sons of the elohim, who created us, liked our female creations so much, they mated with them. This is half-breed race was The Jews. The other caucasians were not half-breeds.
Yahweh, however, wasn't involved with Gen 6, obviously, since he was told to destroy all the life here, as well as their 'fallen angels' in exile here. So when HE, himself, inseminated Mary, Jesus WAS, at that point in time at least, the ONLY Begotten Son of Yahweh.
As for Gen 2, the tree of knowledge didn't have fruits, it was a library and, unlike the previous versions of mankind, they didn't ask questions. But the ones we know as Adam and Eve, created in their image and likeness, did. They wanted to know, and one of the other elohim scientists (like a serpent) slithered in and told them the truth. And then their eyes were opened. They weren't not wearing clothing, they just now had more scientific knowledge than they could handle. They realized they knew nothing (were naked).
They say the Prophets, and Prophecy, did not SEE the future: the future didn't happen yet, they don't claim to know the future. The prophets were only revealed the truth, in terms they felt could be understood, each step of the way. Which is why the claim "never changes" makes people scratch their head wondering why all the writings seem to show a whole lot of change through time.
Yahweh's well known and often repeated statement "I am the Alpha and the Omega" means that before there was life on Earth, he existed, he was here first with the first recon crew. And if this planet goverment forces him to blow us to smitherines again, HE will still be around, hence, the last.
IN other words, if he has to destroy this planet, he was here first, and he'll still be here after we're gone.
The Eternals claim their bodies can go 700-1000 years, and when they're over 700, they dna create and clone a new body, move all the memory and experience over, and they're good for another 700 years.
We were originally created with that lifespan, our dna, like their dna. But after the Noah incident, they made us only with a 120 year span (and like light bulbs, they don't necessarily last that long in the field LOL)
There's a lot more... this didn't even scratch the surface. But, I dunno.. it does sound kinda like it all fits, all the missing and confusing puzzle pieces now make a lot more sense. Is it an understanding, or just another good story? We don't know now.. but some day we, or our offspring, may find out for sure.
They also don't Believe in an almight God who created everything... they didn't create the DNA rules, they just, like us, discovered how it works and how they can maniplate it.
Sorry this is so long, didn't have time to make it shorter
