I quit the teaching education

[Rebekka]

Just want to let you know that yesterday I quit from the teaching education (to get my high school teaching degree to teach Dutch - I started February 11). It depressed me so very much - I just had to quit for my own mental health.

It's not the teaching itself that I hate, it's the courses at uni that drive me crazy - the idiotic ideas on pedagogy they tried to poison me with. (I have strong opinions on what is good education, and my teachers at uni think 100% differently). I could not sell their product, it went against my morals. And all seemed so grey and dreary to me - it was as if happiness didn't exist anymore.

I hope to continue it one day, but right now I'm taking a break. In the meantime I'll work on my PhD thesis so it's not like I'll have nothing to do.

On the upside, I feel a whole lot better now that I finally took the decision to quit (I was miserable with the teaching education from the start, but hoped to outgrow it - alas, quite the contrary): I'm not nearly as depressed now as I was last week. I went to the doctor this morning, and he agreed with me quitting.

So now you know.

 

[fuzzymel]

Congrats!

The important thing is you tried. If you hadn't of given it a go you would have regretted it.

Enjoy doing you PhD thesis and hopefully something right for you will come along.

 

[Epoh99]

I am so happy for you! I believe strongly in doing what's best for yourself no matter what other's think (as long as God is leading the way). I'm a people pleaser and care too much what other's think. My anxiety over the past few years has made me realize I have to quit that kind of thinking.

So, I think it's great you did what was right for YOU and your health. I support what you're doing 100% (not that it matters, but I do ).

 

[Rebekka]

Congrats!

The important thing is you tried. If you hadn't of given it a go you would have regretted it.

Enjoy doing you PhD thesis and hopefully something right for you will come along.

Thank you mel! Yes, I would have regretted it if I hadn't given it a try.

I am so happy for you! I believe strongly in doing what's best for yourself no matter what other's think (as long as God is leading the way). I'm a people pleaser and care too much what other's think. My anxiety over the past few years has made me realize I have to quit that kind of thinking.

So, I think it's great you did what was right for YOU and your health. I support what you're doing 100% (not that it matters, but I do ).

Thanks Hope. I'm like you - at first it bothered me so much what other people would think ( "giving up is weak") that I kept going even though I couldn't anymore. One of the good things about my current depression, about the lowest of my depression even (and no one wants to go there but still it has one good thing), is that it made me realise that in the end, it doesn't matter what other people think - my own mental health matters more than what other people might think of me.

And you know what? The people whose judgment I feared the most (my parents and inlaws) don't judge me at all, they understand! Have yet to tell the rest but I think I can take it.

 

[127.0.0.1]

Well, that's what college/uni is for. You try new stuff and see if you like it. I'm sure most people who go to college/uni wind up doing something totally different from what they intended going in. In my eng102 class, on the last day, we watched a tape recording of a speech from a Spokane NA graduate, he said at one point he wanted to be a lawyer, but he couldn't do it, they kept asking him to sign treatise!

Hope you have fun getting your PHD!

 

[Rembrandtfan]

The important thing is that you are doing what is best for you.

Glad you're feeling better.

 

[Rebekka]

Thanks Command and Rembrandtfan.

 

[snoochface]

I think it's great that you had the courage to do what you knew was right for you. Not enough people do that, and they end up living miserable lives where they hate their jobs, hate even waking up in the morning, because they so dread what their day will be like. Good for you for putting an end to it before it got to that point!

We are a lot alike. I had a very similar experience, with the fears about how I'd be judged and everything along with it. It was a good choice for me, too.

 

[Rebekka]

I think it's great that you had the courage to do what you knew was right for you. Not enough people do that, and they end up living miserable lives where they hate their jobs, hate even waking up in the morning, because they so dread what their day will be like. Good for you for putting an end to it before it got to that point!

We are a lot alike. I had a very similar experience, with the fears about how I'd be judged and everything along with it. It was a good choice for me, too.

Thank you snooch.
"...hate even waking up in the morning, because they so dread what their day will be like. Good for you for putting an end to it before it got to that point!" - well, it had got to that point, actually. :o But I managed to get out of it - just in time, because I really was collapsing (last week was the hardest). Thank God - I came to my senses in time.

 

[mina]

I'm a teacher and i presently HATE it. I wish i could quit! I'm glad you are able to do so!!

 

[HeyHomie]

What do you plan to do for your career now?

 

[bluebug83]

I am so happy for you! I believe strongly in doing what's best for yourself no matter what other's think (as long as God is leading the way). I'm a people pleaser and care too much what other's think.

Epoh - I'm EXACTLY the same way.

And Rebekkah, just wondering, but is there any way you could go to a different uni that teaches more along the lines of what you think, or get your degree and then teach in the style you believe in? One thing that drives me nuts is how higher education should be about broadening your mind, but many schools/professors see it as their mandate to pound in to you their way of thinking so you turn in to little clones of themselves instead of exposing you to a wide variety of thought.

 

[Rebekka]

What do you plan to do for your career now?

Well, the word "career" always scares me (as I'm one of the least ambitious people I know ), but - hm. My doctor advised me to take some rest first (at least a month), so that's what I'll do - and work on my thesis in my own pace. I don't know yet what I'll do next. I'm still depressed; the future scares me right now.
I might look for a job at a bookstore (have worked there before) or a teaching job at a school (there's a shortage of teachers, so schools sometimes hire teachers without the teaching degree, if they have the right Masters degree -which I have), or something else.

Epoh - I'm EXACTLY the same way.

And Rebekkah, just wondering, but is there any way you could go to a different uni that teaches more along the lines of what you think, or get your degree and then teach in the style you believe in? One thing that drives me nuts is how higher education should be about broadening your mind, but many schools/professors see it as their mandate to pound in to you their way of thinking so you turn in to little clones of themselves instead of exposing you to a wide variety of thought.

Another university isn't an option, because the teaching education is more or less the same all over the Netherlands, and I live too far away from other universities to get there in time for courses (I live in a tiny village with bad public transport, and I don't drive) - also, universities have a limited number of schools they can (or will) send you to, so a uni further away from my house would also mean a school further from my house. It was bad enough to reach "my" high school from where I live, and this one was supposed to be "near" me.

Your other suggestion, getting the degree and then doing as I please seemed like the right thing to do before I started - and if I ever finish the degree, this is my plan. Sadly, schools in general are not on my side right now, the climate isn't right for me - only a small group of schools (the only one I know of is in Amsterdam, much too far from where I live) are on my wavelength when it comes to education.

Right now, I can't survive the one-year teaching education. It's nice to be able to look past it, but that's irrelevant if I can't make it that far. Lots of people are put off by the teaching education - there's a huge shortage of qualified teachers, and the fascist ideas of the teaching education people are a big reason why the shortage still continues. This probably doesn't make sense, but it's the truth. I'm not the only one who got sick of the nonsense they teach future teachers. I know of people who fled to Curaçao (a Dutch island in the Caribbean) to get the degree, because that way they were sure that the pedagogists from uni would not follow them (Curaçao being too far away) so they could get their degree unsupervised. I seriously considered that, but I didn't want to get away from my husband that long - I'm not a strong person, I'm a wuss.

 

[127.0.0.1]

One thing that drives me nuts is how higher education should be about broadening your mind, but many schools/professors see it as their mandate to pound in to you their way of thinking so you turn in to little clones of themselves instead of exposing you to a wide variety of thought.

Everyone, this is called "parenting", pronounce it it "pair-en-ting". I will also accept "homeschooling" or in some cases "private schooling". Just remember that your essays are due Monday and I expect them all to conform to my guidelines.

 

[Mskedi]

What is being taught that you think is so wrong? Now I'm curious.

I wasn't taught *bad* things when I studied to be a teacher, but I would say a lot of what they prepared me for wasn't realistic.

 

[Rebekka]

What is being taught that you think is so wrong? Now I'm curious.

I wasn't taught *bad* things when I studied to be a teacher, but I would say a lot of what they prepared me for wasn't realistic.

It's so many things, it would be an endless list.
The Dutch education system changed drastically about 10 years ago. They replaced knowledge with vague skills, you're not allowed to teach things I find important (certain aspects of grammar, the bulk of literature, spelling, etc.) but you're required to teach things I find unimportant. The quality of education now is much, much lower than it was 10+ years ago.

Also, the teacher is demoted to an assistant, it's not about teaching but about learning. And pupils are supposed to do everything themselves, don't really need a teacher anymore, only need to know how to look things up on the internet. Knowledge is outdated, you only need to know where to find information. Absolute truth doesn't exist, morality doesn't exist. Perception is everything.

This doesn't work (it's proven that the old system is far more efficient, and better for pupils and teachers; today's society is more stupid than it was 10+ years ago), but the teachers who teach future teachers pretend they don't know that it doesn't work. You're not allowed to criticise them - they believe in their ideology.

I'm very oldfashioned when it comes to teaching, and I can't function in the modern system that took all the power away from teachers and gave it to government, management and others.

There's more, but it depresses me to talk about it, sorry.

 

[cherryblossom03]

No one can fault you on doing what's best for you. Good luck on your thesis!

 

[invisiblebabe]

Good for you! I hope your PhD research is going well!