I have a problem with women

[LJSGM]

Luke 18

9To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everybody else, Jesus told this parable: 10"Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. 11The Pharisee stood up and prayed about[a] himself: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other men—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. 12I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.'

13"But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, 'God, have mercy on me, a sinner.' 14"I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted."

 

[sampa]

........... that I don't understand women and I feel like I have been used, and I assume all girls are going to use me - kinda of like what Diva said but on for a man.

............want you to pray for me thanks that you would even bother for someone like me

jream,I was attracted to reading this thread b/c there's a guy that's 24yrs old and seems to have this kind of opinion, most all girls are harlots. thought about asking your advice on the guy, but that seems besides the point.

Do you have any female friends that you don't have attraction to or just see as sisters in Christ and wont' do something physically with? Someone brought this up as advice, another older male, to the guy mentioned above.

Side note in response to your first question;
"Are there women that aren't harlots? Because it's all I've ever met except like my mom. Every time, it's a cycle, once a girl hits that age range, they turn bad, when do they get their head on straight?"

I don't know if I'm the average statistic, (since I'm out of the genearation your addressing), but I had boyfriends and between the ages of 17-19. Got saved when I was 19, did a big turn-around and basically was just friends with most guys. Only allowed one kiss over the years since then, that's a long time. I still have not been in a real relationship (19 being my last boyfriend) and did a lot of cleaning out in my life last year (spiritual kind of fasting and looking at generational things and unhealthy attractions). I'm trying to step out and take more risk, but it's hard to find men that don't want to do something physical and keep the relationship pure before God.

So jream, I believe there is hope, I'm sure there's other women 19-22 likeminded.
Just looking at the singles section of CF there's 19year olds that still have never been kissed or 23 year olds that haven't dated. Does that encourage you?
Will pray for you tonight, IN Christ, Sampa

 

[jesuspickedmeup]

Ok the last few posts were great, thank you guys and girls, well men and women. I think my problem is that I don't understand women and I feel like I have been used, and I assume all girls are going to use me - kinda of like what Diva said but on for a man.

It makes sense girls who dont trust, oh i gotta go to the doctor.
Thank you for posts you guys, and RebbecaTG I do want you to pray for me thanks that you would even bother for someone like me

trust me brother you will never understand women so just move on

 

[RebeccatheGreat]

Thank you for posts you guys, and RebbecaTG I do want you to pray for me thanks that you would even bother for someone like me

You are absolutely worth praying for! just don't ever call me an old woman again .I kid,I kid.

and trust is a very hard thing to regain,I know from experience.

God Bless

 

[RebeccatheGreat]

trust me brother you will never understand women so just move on

very true,haha.
really all females need 3 things.
security,respect & to be admired.if we have all 3,we're pretty much happy campers.or maybe I'm just simple.....:o

 

[fuzzymel]

very true,haha.
really all females need 3 things.
security,respect & to be admired.if we have all 3,we're pretty much happy campers.or maybe I'm just simple.....:o

Nope that sounds about right.

 

[foreveramanda]

trust me brother you will never understand women so just move on

*laugh* my husband tells me at least once a day that he doesn't understand women - well I don't understand men

very true,haha.
really all females need 3 things.
security,respect & to be admired.if we have all 3,we're pretty much happy campers.or maybe I'm just simple.....:o

I agree - though being pampered sometimes is nice to


to the OP I consider myself a nice girl. I don't harlot. I actually never dated a guy until I met my husband. He is my first everything - date, kiss, etc etc etc. There are some girls out there that aren't a good example but on the flip side there are guys out there too. Every woman (and man) is different and acts and reacts in a different way to things. If you are pushed around as a young child you expect to be pushed around because it is a way of life. I am 20 years old and I have grown up watching the same shows/movies you have. What do girls and guys in that age range watch? We see violent movies, tv shows that don't blink an eye at making females out to be 'harlots', and the image that men need to be angry, pushy, and violent to women. It is what we see on the big screen and the tv - and sadly people buy into it. It is made even worse when you don't have a good example at home. All these things work together and before you know it you have a society of lose girls and violent men. I can only speak from my experience and I can tell you that what I see for 'role models' for today's youth are people that shouldn't leave rehab because they will be back in 24 hours, short loveless marriages, lack of Christ, short skirts and skimpy tops, and people that walk around without any underwear on. This all comes together and we think that is how we are supposed to act. To get the guy, to be famous, to reach the big time we have to harlot ourselves out. We forget that there is a better way. O stayed true to myself. I wore what I wanted and more often than not you didn't see me wearing shorts and my belly button was never seen. I set a standard for myself that did not involve being anything less than my best. Right before I met my husband I had given up on meeting a good guy. The boys I knew could not look past the fact that I am not model beautiful they couldn't see I am God's idea of beautiful. Good girls, solid guys they are out there. And sometimes they are hidden in plain sight.

I hope this is coherent I am not feeling on top of my game and am I only on the computer because my attempt at a nap failed.

Blessings to all.

 

[1Newcreation]

Ok the last few posts were great, thank you guys and girls, well men and women. I think my problem is that I don't understand women and I feel like I have been used, and I assume all girls are going to use me - kinda of like what Diva said but on for a man.

It makes sense girls who dont trust, oh i gotta go to the doctor.
Thank you for posts you guys, and RebbecaTG I do want you to pray for me thanks that you would even bother for someone like me

I don't think we understand ourselves sometimes!

Really we aren't ever going to completely 'get' the opposite sex. I think it works both ways.

But just because we don't understand something, it doesn't mean we just give up on it and have resentment towards it.

You could compare your frustration with women to math.
For example I did not understand math, I use to get very upset over it, and I began to hate it.!!!
And I became more despondent, just as your expectations of women are becoming.

I then got a really good teacher, who helped me and I began to have a better appreciation for it.
I was shown that certain math problems were all different but had similarities (like women), and there was more than one way to come to a solution or conclusion. It sometimes just took a different approach and a change of thinking. But there is always a basic formula to follow. (like there is for women)

So you need to have a different approach, come in looking at this problem from a different angle. But have the basic formula of respect, giving assurance and admiration for women and you may have a more positive result.

Basic formula for having a better view of women
make sure you have

a good teacher, Christ being #1 who will show you how to have....... respect + admiration
+ appreciation + compassion + just plain good thinking....+ confidence (expect the best, not the worst) = a woman God desires for you.

God bless you
1newcreation

 

[aldar]

very true,haha.
really all females need 3 things.
security,respect & to be admired.if we have all 3,we're pretty much happy campers.or maybe I'm just simple.....:o

buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuullcrap!
hehe....
you atleast forgot
conversation,
affection,
family commitment,

 

[aldar]

jdream,

1st step of understanding women...do not..do not ask a woman about another woman... becuase women are the most competitive creatures in the world.

That little tid about women needing to be "admired" thats the horn of that beastly creature in hiding, women need to feel like they are the only woman in the room, they often demand your full utmost attention, women don't even want a hint or even the imagination that you think another woman hotter than she is... weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew no. women....don't like each other hehe. put too in a ring and you will soon have ground beef and some scattered hair. You know how they make the most realistic were-wolf movies? they put women in a room and trick one into assessing anothers woman choice of shoes... give em 10 mins and just start rolling the cameras!

don't ask a womans advice or opinion about another woman, becuase they are too competitive to give you a fair answer. no lie... haha.

 

[1Newcreation]

jdream,

1st step of understanding women...do not..do not ask a woman about another woman... becuase women are the most competitive creatures in the world.

That little tid about women needing to be "admired" thats the horn of that beastly creature in hiding, women need to feel like they are the only woman in the room, they often demand your full utmost attention, women don't even want a hint or even the imagination that you think another woman hotter than she is... weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew no. women....don't like each other hehe. put too in a ring and you will soon have ground beef and some scattered hair. You know how they make the most realistic were-wolf movies? they put women in a room and trick one into assessing anothers woman choice of shoes... give em 10 mins and just start rolling the cameras!

don't ask a womans advice or opinion about another woman, becuase they are too competitive to give you a fair answer. no lie... haha.

You guys are so funny. And it is odd that when I read the remark about being admired, I read it in a whole different way, I saw the definition as similar to respect. You may have misinterpreted the definition.

For example, It is good to admire a woman, a mother who works really hard for her children even when she is sick, we can admire a woman who is fighting adversity but with God's strength can come through in victory. Consider women in history, like Rosa Parks, she and women like her are women to be respected and admired.
We can admire a mother who watches her son or daughter make foolish decisions in life, but is always there for them no matter what. This is admiration. Not 'adore me, aren't I beautiful.' admiration. Come on now we are not all so shallow.

Please don't just jump to conclusions and make such bold statements about women. We do have something valid to offer, we aren't all about our looks. And a woman who is confident in Christ does not need the validity of a man's compliment and the need to be center of attention or is competitive with other sisters in the Lord.

God bless you
1newcreation

 

[Forealzchola]

Read my Post from last week.
I said exactly the same thing and got about 100 other guys to agree.

http://www.christianforums.com/t5816480

I hate to say it but the Muslims were right in keeping their women on very short ropes, at least if they cheat they get stoned to death, over here if you cheat you get a new husband and get to step on the heart of the old one lol.

ok see now this is showing a big lack of respect towards women and sexism...it would be wise of you to seek a christian counsler to speak about this issuse you have, which seems to be steming off from past rejected experiences....

 

[EllaBella]

Understand what you are saying here. There are very few strong young Christians out there Brother.

It's a viscious cycle really, ungodly young men encourage young women to make themselves more sexually appealing, so they do it, they have pressure from other girls too. It's almost like a competition out there on who can be the "hottest" and who can display the most "sex appeal"

It's sad really we are told that to enjoy our youth we need to party, drink & have fun, when in reality all this leads to is the feeling of worthlessness and waking up one day at age 30 to realise you have nothing.

I feel for those who don't have Jesus...

Just remember Psalm 84:11
For the LORD God [is] a sun and shield: the LORD will give grace and glory: no good [thing] will he withhold from them that walk uprightly.

If you set about continuing your walk uprightly, the Lord will not withhold a Godly woman from you if it is his will