I have a problem when I get bored, and it's pretty bad..

[Handy Andy]

Hi all, never posted on here before.

So I'll get down to it, I'm a currently unemployed security guard, recently passed my police exam and I may be only 6-10 months away from going to the depot. However, being unemployed I can never find enough to fill my time, even if I assign myself multiple tasks, I'm still left with hours and hours to fill, and I get very bored.

Unfortunately, when I get this bored, I instantly think about sex. I'll go on tinder and message some of my matches, and if they don't want to hang out, I go to craigslist.

Here's the worst part, in my life, I have had sex with ten times as many men as I have women, and it seems only when I'm very very bored, that I want to have sex with a man.

I pray to God for forgiveness, but I don't think it's enough, I don't want to go to hell for being an abomination, so my question is, how do I stop? How do I fill my time so I'm not bored and give in to these urges that I normally never feel?

I've tried movies, videogames, youtube videos, netflix, reading, I even started writing a second novel, but nothing keeps my interest long enough.

I am single, and haven't come close to finding the right woman yet, so I find it hard to distract myself.

Help?

 

[BFine]

Romans 13:11-14
"And do this, knowing the time, that now it is high time to awake out of sleep; for now our salvation is nearer than when we first believed.
The night is far spent, the day is at hand.
Therefore let us cast off the works of darkness, and let us put on the armor of light. Let us walk properly, as in the day, not in revelry and drunkenness, not in lewdness and lust, not in strife and envy.
But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision
for the flesh, to fulfill its lusts."


http://www.freeheartday.com/18-powerful-resolves-for-overcoming-sexual-temptations/

 

[tturt]

Pursue getting a better understanding of G_d's love for you. Encourage you to acknowledge He loves you every few minutes. Scriptures such as "Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Rom 8:39; "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." John 3:16; "We love him, because he first loved us." I John 4:19 (suggest personalizing it).

Also, encourage you to do a study of God's names, titles, and attributes. There are hundreds.

 

[Goodbook]

First you must believe the gospel.,do you believe Jesus christ is the son of God who died on the cross for you to pay for the sins of all mankind, was buried, and rose again on the third day? This Jesus can set you free from sin. Place your trust in Him and he can do a work in you.

To stop sinning repent of your unbelief, change your mind and decide this day who you will serve. The Lord almighty or your flesh and lusts, which satan has you in bondage. The two are incompatible.

Do you have a bible? Start reading it and pray for God to help you understand it.

 

[grandvizier1006]

You're not an abomination for having sexual thoughts--even if they're about men. It's just something you shouldn't act on.

If you are a believer and have accepted Jesus into your heart, then you are saved forever. If you express repentance every time you do something wrong and do your best to look into God's Word and understand more and more about what Christianity truly is, then you have nothing to fear.

 

[aiki]

Hi all, never posted on here before.

So I'll get down to it, I'm a currently unemployed security guard, recently passed my police exam and I may be only 6-10 months away from going to the depot. However, being unemployed I can never find enough to fill my time, even if I assign myself multiple tasks, I'm still left with hours and hours to fill, and I get very bored.

Here's a thought: Why not fill those many hours with Jesus?

Unfortunately, when I get this bored, I instantly think about sex. I'll go on tinder and message some of my matches, and if they don't want to hang out, I go to craigslist.

Here's the worst part, in my life, I have had sex with ten times as many men as I have women, and it seems only when I'm very very bored, that I want to have sex with a man.

Yuck, dude. I mean, really, YUCK! Gross, even. Your problem isn't boredom, it is a wicked, unregenerate heart.

I pray to God for forgiveness, but I don't think it's enough, I don't want to go to hell for being an abomination, so my question is, how do I stop? How do I fill my time so I'm not bored and give in to these urges that I normally never feel?

I've tried movies, videogames, youtube videos, netflix, reading, I even started writing a second novel, but nothing keeps my interest long enough.

I am single, and haven't come close to finding the right woman yet, so I find it hard to distract myself.

Why pray to God for forgiveness? Just to ease your conscience? Buddy, God sees your heart; He sees your true intentions, your core desires and He responds to you accordingly. God's not in the business of simply easing your guilt so you can feel more comfortable about sinning. He commands you to be holy as He is holy. He demands that you yield your life to His will and way. Until you forsake your sinful, self-centered living and start living in sincere, loving obedience to Him, you'll continue to spiral further and further down into wickedness. And at the end of that spiral eternal hell awaits you.

I would look in horror upon you marrying any woman. Dude, your life is vile and disgusting! Why would you want to invite any woman into such a life? You need to be washed in the cleansing blood of Christ and be brought to new spiritual life in him. God help any woman who marries you before you've done so!

Galatians 5:19-25
19 Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness,
20 idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies,
21 envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like; of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told you in time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,
23 gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.
24 And those who are Christ's have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.
25 If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.

John 8:34-36
34 Jesus answered them, "Most assuredly, I say to you, whoever commits sin is a slave of sin.
35 And a slave does not abide in the house forever, but a son abides forever.
36 Therefore if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed.

Selah.

 

[Locum7]

Hey, few things to work through. Def need to seek God and genuine savation first. But you will need to find other ways to use you time well, not just fill it. Time is precious, learn to value it and treasure it. Take some time out to think through what you want you do with your time, but i think that your issue wont go away when you get a job. Cut off anything from your life which has sexual content in it, films, games etc. Fill your life with Christ, time, bible time, just talk to him about everything, listen to worship music. Learn his word and meditate on it. Speak his truth over yourself daily, e.g i can do all things through Christ who strengthens me phil 4v13. Pray through the armour of God in ephesians 6 and the fruits of the spirit in gal 5. Keep an ear out for your thoughts, some may be a clue why you are inclining your heart to this sinful thinking, especially negative past experience. Remember also that satan will push you towards that thinking so start resisting, along with all the above. Plus some accoubtable fellowship with other Christians, forums are not enough. This is just a starting point so wont solve it for you, but it might set your feet on the path to healing. Blessings

 

[Sketcher]

Why is your name "Handy Andy?" Are you defining yourself by this struggle?

 

[royal priest]

Hi all, never posted on here before.

So I'll get down to it, I'm a currently unemployed security guard, recently passed my police exam and I may be only 6-10 months away from going to the depot. However, being unemployed I can never find enough to fill my time, even if I assign myself multiple tasks, I'm still left with hours and hours to fill, and I get very bored.

Unfortunately, when I get this bored, I instantly think about sex. I'll go on tinder and message some of my matches, and if they don't want to hang out, I go to craigslist.

Here's the worst part, in my life, I have had sex with ten times as many men as I have women, and it seems only when I'm very very bored, that I want to have sex with a man.

I pray to God for forgiveness, but I don't think it's enough, I don't want to go to hell for being an abomination, so my question is, how do I stop? How do I fill my time so I'm not bored and give in to these urges that I normally never feel?

I've tried movies, videogames, youtube videos, netflix, reading, I even started writing a second novel, but nothing keeps my interest long enough.

I am single, and haven't come close to finding the right woman yet, so I find it hard to distract myself.

Help?

You have misidentified the problem. It is not boredom, it is sin. Sin is conceived in the heart through lust and that is where you need to stop it. If you fail to stop it there, sin will come to birth as you act on it. James 1:14-15.
You are right for thinking that praying for forgiveness is not enough. Proverbs 28:13 Forsaking means repenting. Repenting means more than to just stop doing something. True repentance is not merely negative, but also positive. It means turning from sin, to God.
The only hope you have for true repentance is to be united with Jesus. He is your only hope against temptation. John 15:5
Being united to Jesus means following Him. following Him means doing what He tells you to do. This is how you guard your heart from sin. It is not by playing video games, or watching television, or keeping busy with mundane activity. Rather, you need a relationship with the Savior. If you are logging onto Tinder, then you are already failing at the level of your heart. You need to deal with your wicked heart. You need to bring your evil heart to Jesus and plead with Him to change it, to take away evil desire and for Him to give you a heart that loves Him, wants to serve Him, and you need to want to kill the sin in your heart.
Examine your heart. Examine your activities. What are you doing that might trigger lust in your heart? If you can't think of anything, then you need to fill it with things that will counter your lust. Read your Bible ALOT. Pray ALOT. Find a church that will help you to draw near to Jesus and help you grow in understanding who Jesus is and how He helps His people deal with their wicked hearts.
I will pray for you, that God will help you to become a slave of righteousness. Romans 6:12-14

 

[AGTG]

What you need is good old-fashioned repentance covered by the shed blood of Jesus and empowered by His Holy Spirit.

It might look like this:

You cease any and all pornographic or sexual activity, you delete and destroy any connections with those things, including closing online accounts and browser histories.

Then, and this is the most important thing, when temptations arise to return to any of those activities, call out to Jesus and ask Him for the power to overcome the temptation.

He will be faithful to rise above your raging tempest of temptation and quell the storm and seas.

Repeat and rinse until He has fully extracted the demonic claws which have taken hold of your heart. It could be days or weeks, but don't give up, don't give in, He will deliver you if you want Him to.

Then, the power of these temptations will be outside of your body, and much weaker, than they are currently.

Create and maintain godly boundaries from there forward and follow Jesus.

Here are the scriptures which back up this practical approach to repentance:

1 Corinthians 10
13 No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.

Hebrews 12
4 In your struggle against sin you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood.