I am going to die alone.

[Kenny'sID]

Thank you. I do alright in some areas, but am completely incapable in others. If anything it is a weird type of conundrum.

You're welcome, and I understand, just wish I could do more, but it seem prayer is is about the only thing we can do sometimes.

I learned a long time ago life is not fair. I know there are many people that have it much worse than I do.

No, it's not fair at all, it wasn't for me anyway, and knowing there are those worse off helps a little, but what really helps is it's just a few more years until life really begins.

Compared to eternity, this is nothing but an extended boot camp to get us ready and see what we qualify for. So hang in there and keep your eye on the main goal/prize and problems with this life don't seem so bad as they are very short lived.

 

[Ohj1n37]

I believe prayers have been answered and a piece if not all of my puzzle has been completed. I want to share what I have come to understand because this may help others who are in my situation. I also want to give thanks for the prayers. I had recently read chapter 7 verses 15-18 in Ecclesiastes. I recalled the verses in my head last night and started reading commentaries on them.

Essentially the verses say that there are some cases where good people suffer and bad people have good lives for seemly no reason. This can cause good people who suffer to fall into sin by doing one of two things. The first is to fall out of faith and to start sinning. The second is the more dangerous as it is not obvious in how it is sin. A term is coined super-righteousness and is not the same as the self-righteousness seen in other parts of the Bible.

Super-righteousness is when a suffering person who is saved tries to behave righteously, so that God would change their circumstance. Another way of wording this is, "If I behave very good God will 'owe me' and get me out of this horrible situation I am in."

My situation encompassed this and in some ways can be considered deeper. When I was little and was not saved I cursed God for my situation. When I was saved I knew it was not God's fault and have only now just realized that I been throwing the blame on myself. The act of placing blame is the error. My condition, the loneliness, and psychological issues, are a test. There is no one to place the blame on and seeing my issues as a test takes away the pain, the anger, the sadness, and the jealous for a normal life. This is how I know it is the solution to my problems.

Now that I can see more clearly I can trace back what I have been feeling in various situations that have lead to emotional outbursts in which I can not contain. I would see something I did not get to have or may never get have, such as a romantic relationship with a woman. This would make me angry or sad with myself. Why have I yet to have a girlfriend? Why can't I hold a job? Why am I so pathetic? Up until recently I would place the blame on myself, causing emotional outbursts. Now I know it's not my fault. Now I fully realize it is a test.

If anyone is going through a similar predicament I recommend reading Ecclesiastes chapter 7 15-18, Psalm 73, and looking up a few commentaries on Ecclesiastes chapter 7 15-18. Thank you for the prayers and the help everyone. I have a new hope. Now I have a new line of thought to challenge my inner demons.

 

[Ohj1n37]

To clarify, what I mean by test might be better described as refine. I am going through struggles and it is no ones' fault. I am not to blame. God is testing me or refining me, that is God is making me into a better person than I would be and is drawing me near to him.

 

[savedbygrace94]

I had been crushing on a girl at church for the past four or so years of my life. She brought her boyfriend to church today and it totally destroyed me. To make things worse my sister got mad at me and confirmed that, "No girl would ever like me and I will die alone."

My main problem is that autism runs in my family and I have it real bad. I am very clumsy, but my biggest problem is that I am essentially socially retarded. One time a girl asked me, "Do I look fat?" and to that I replied, " I think I look fat." I am 6'2 and 170lbs. I learned that was a bad answer because she never talked to me again (by the way the girl was not fat I just got so nervous I had verbal vomit).

Anyway I am horribly depressed because the last four or so years of my life have been wasted crushing over someone I never had a chance with. I am pretty pathetic. I have been trying unsuccessfully to get a six pack for three years or so now, so I would be attractive to women. I am an extremely emotional person. I am just not sure what to do.

I have been asking for God to either take me to be with him or to please come hang out with me because I have no friends or a girlfriend to hang out with in real life. I use to play video games, but I do not like them anymore. I am afraid to drive. I live cooped up with a family who I do not get along with.

What do I do with my life? I feel like I am just smart enough to suffer great emotional pain, but just incapable enough to not be able to do anything about it.

Hey there! Firstly, I'm so sorry that you had to go through this. it must have been really disappointing for you to see someone you were interested in with someone else. Sadly, this situation is one that many of us have found ourselves in before (myself included) and it left me feeling the same way as you. However, I have learned a few valuable lessons from my experience with this.

1) when you are interested in someone, do not allow yourself to fantasize too much on what might be. this fuels the fire and will make you feel a lot closer to them than you actually are, this is also likely to cause infatuation and not love. The Bible warns us to Guard our heart with all diligence for from it flow the issues of life Proverbs 4:23. Arguably, by emotionally jumping straight in and maintaining a crush for such an extended period of time... somewhere along the line maybe you were not as careful with your heat as you could have been. But that's okay... it's a valuable lesson to learn and the balance between guarding your heart and not building walls around your heart is a tough one to strike up! prayer and wisdom will help you in this area.

2) do not be led by your feelings. The heart is deceitful and our feelings are constantly changing. if we are constantly following our feelings we will never have stability! you have to take dominion over these thoughts you are experiencing (thoughts of depression and inadequacy). We have biblical authority to resists these thoughts/ lies of the enemy! we can quench the fiery darts of the enemy with our shield of faith Ephesians 6:16. So when you have such thoughts, take up the word of God and see what the creator says about you. read about your worth in Christ. God died for you and that is your true worth... not whether a girl likes you or even how many friends you have.

3) Attraction for a truly godly woman will not be skin-deep. someone will like you for who you are on the inside. To one a woman that is truly pursuing the lord's heart, your relationship with God and your faithfulness to him will be very attractive.

Although, I don't see any problem with wishing to change your appearance if it makes you feel better and means you are taking care of your body, but don't do it for others.

My final thoughts and prayer for you is that God gives you eyes to see how much he loves you, that he will show you the gift of friendship and eventually in the right season bless you with a companion because it is true that it is not good for man to be alone, BUT Christ is more than enough of a covering for you.

I hope this helps

God Bless x